


Blindsight

by royal_nonesuch



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Angst, Catharsis, Drama, Friendship, Gen, Injury Recovery, Major Character Injury
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-11-15
Packaged: 2018-10-27 22:55:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 51,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10818462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/royal_nonesuch/pseuds/royal_nonesuch
Summary: This is a multi-chapter story exploring Ignis' struggle to recover from his injury sustained during the Leviathan battle.  It takes place before the party leaves for Tenebrae.  Prompto wants to help Ignis get back on his feet, but Gladio believes they don't have enough time to wait for him to heal.  Emphasis on inner strength, friendship, and fate.  Lots of angst, but ultimately there is catharsis.*I've had to create a couple of OCs to round out the cast (primarily hospital staff.  That tells you just how sad ch. 9 was!!)*





	1. Chapter 1

** _Altissia_ **

            “Do not board that ship, Chancellor.” Ignis warned.  He had no intention of letting Ardyn approach the Oracle.  He had his daggers drawn.  Ardyn slowly turned from the boarding ramp to face the younger man.  

            “My, you look so intimidating.”  His tone was petulant, mocking.  “And if I do?” Ardyn asked provokingly.

            “I will kill you.”

            “Oh I wish that you could, believe me I do.”  Ardyn walked slowly towards Ignis.  “Aren't you going to try?” He said holding his arms outstretched, exposing every vital target.  Ignis held his ground, but made no attempt to strike.  “Just as I suspected.”  Ardyn turned and sauntered back towards the ship when he felt a dagger sink deep into his back.  He turned around, smiling.

            “Now that’s more like it.  In the back no less--but you are the most ruthless one.”  

            “I warned you,” Ignis clarified.

            Ardyn pulled the dagger out of his back and held it in his hand.  Ignis threw his second dagger, this time directly into Ardyn’s heart.  He hunched over for a moment, but stood up quickly.  He was laughing.  Ignis couldn’t understand.  He hadn’t seen anything like it.  He reached for a flask of fire--perhaps elemancy could affect him.

            “Isn’t it obvious yet? You cannot harm me.”  Ardyn removed the dagger from his heart and threw it onto the stone platform.  He was a little angry now.  Suddenly, Ignis felt every muscle in his body freeze. Ardyn closed the distance between them.  He took the flask of fire from Ignis’ frozen hand.  “Wouldn’t want you to accidentally drop this now would we?”  He slipped the dagger he was holding into his belt and held the flask.  He started to circle Ignis.

            “What should I do with you?” Ardyn asked lightly.  It was starting to become obvious to Ignis that this meeting was not by chance--it was a trap and he’d fallen into it.  “I could kill you, but that would be awfully pedestrian.  And let’s be frank, Noctis would not have the wits to complete this journey without you.”  Ignis struggled, but his limbs were not responsive.  Ardyn kept eyeing him--the way a tailor might regard a client.

            “Hmmm.  I might have just the thing...Have you ever read the prophecy?”  Ignis couldn’t reply.  “Of course you have.  Did you know that one of the warriors of light is supposed to lose his vision?”  Ignis remembered the paintings in the Citadel.  He was never certain if it was literal or metaphorical.  Right now, all he could feel was panic.

            Ardyn stepped directly in front of Ignis and took the glasses from his face.  He looked at them for a moment.

          “‘Specs’ That’s what they call you right?”  He crushed the glasses in his hand and threw them away.  “You won’t be needing those again.”  With that, he closed his right hand around Ignis’ neck.  He held the fire flask in his left.  Suddenly, Ignis felt life return to his limbs.  He knew Ardyn was just toying with him, but he was determined to fight. He gripped Ardyn’s right hand with both of his and tried with all his strength to free himself, but Ardyn was impossibly strong. He couldn’t help but admire Ignis’ spirit.

            “You should be flattered I’m choosing you for this.  You are the only one strong enough to endure it.”  Ignis still couldn’t speak.  His voice caught in his throat.  Ardyn glanced from the fire flask in his hand to the dagger at his belt.

            “Now, how should I do this?”

 

* * *

 

 **Author’s note** : _This story is based on my very speculative theory about what took place during the fight with Leviathan that I have pieced together from dialogue in the game.  I’m being intentionally vague about how exactly Ardyn blinds him (for now anyway--sorry!).  If you have any questions about my thinking, please leave it in the comments or send me a message.  I hope you enjoy!_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minor warning: there are graphic medical situations in this chapter (and subsequent chapters).

Chapter 2

               Gladio rushed through the labyrinthine Altissian streets made even more confusing by the destruction wrought during the fight with Leviathan.  The battle had ended just moments earlier--Noctis was victorious, but the costs were high.  Lady Lunafreya had been killed and Noctis had survived; that much he knew, but he didn’t know the details. He wasn’t searching for Noctis, or Luna, however, he was searching for Ignis.

            The two had separated early on in the fight.  They decided their resources would be better spent in different parts of the city.   The battle was intense, but they were winning.  The empire was in retreat.  Ignis had noticed, however, that Chancellor Izunia’s ship had remained behind.  The last time Gladio spoke to Ignis, he was heading to investigate.  Gladio was starting to fear the worst. 

            His feet splashed loudly; every inch of the city was covered in water.  He climbed a partially shattered staircase near where the Chancellor’s ship had been.  He started shouting Ignis’ name, but wasn’t getting a response.

            “Hey Iggy!  Answer me dammit!!”  At the top of the staircase, Gladio got his answer.  His good friend was lying face down, motionless on the platform.  He raced to his friend’s side and gently rolled him over to his back.  Gladio wasn’t ready for what he saw.

            Ignis’ face was a bloody mess.  He had a very large wound over his left eye--maybe a burn? He couldn’t tell much because the blood obscured everything.  His hair, clothes, everything were drenched.  He must have been lying like that for a while. Gladio leaned closer and put his ear close to his friend’s face.  He could hear and feel him breathing. Some good news anyway.  Seconds later he heard Prompto racing up the staircase.

            “Noct’s alright.” he panted. “But he’s out cold.  The doctors think he will be fine.”  When he finished his message he caught sight of Ignis.

            “Ignis!”  Prompto was terrified.  He charged over and knelt down next to Ignis.  He reached for his wrist and checked his pulse.  It was rapid, but weak.  Not good. 

            “I think he’s in shock,” Prompto explained, “We've got to get him help right now.”  Gladio called for medics over his radio, but didn’t get a response right away.

            “Who knows how long this medevac will take.  I’ll carry him.” Gladio put his arm under Ignis’ shoulders and was ready to scoop him up when Prompto grabbed his arm.

            “No, don’t.  What if he has a spinal injury?”  It was a good point.  Gladio hadn’t even considered it.   They waited a few moments for the medical team to call back, but there was no response.  Prompto watched the blood drip from Ignis’ face the whole time.  To make matters worse, the platform they were on was structurally unsound.  Leviathan had done tremendous damage.  They’d have to take a risk and move him.

            “Forget this, I’m carrying him.”  Gladio scooped Ignis into a fireman’s carry.  Even with his considerable strength, Gladio felt strained by the unconscious body draped over his shoulders.  He moved as quickly as he could down the stairs and towards the field hospital. 

* * *

 

            Medical teams set up some tents in front of the hotel Leville.  They were triaging the considerable number of patients showing up.  Any cases deemed serious enough were taken straight to the hospital.  Gladio and Prompto were overwhelmed by the number of people huddling in the tents.  Some were battle injuries, some were injured in building collapses.  It was a chaotic mess.  Gladio pushed his way through the crowd towards the first doctor he could find.  Prompto noticed how many angry stares they were getting for barging through the line.

            “Doctor,” Gladio said, still trying to catch his breath, “my friend needs help right now.”

            “As you can see, I have many emergency cases already.  Please wait to be evaluated by a nurse--

            “Just help him damn it!” Gladio shouted. “Do you have any idea who this is?  He’s King Noctis’ adviser.”  That seemed to get the result Gladio wanted.  The doctor motioned for him to place Ignis on a nearby stretcher.  Gladio put him there as gently as he could.  Prompto got a good look at his face and felt his stomach lurch.  Not because he was squeamish about blood, but because his friend was in such bad condition.  The blood had run down his face and onto his clothes.

            “I think he’s in shock,” Prompto managed.  The doctor acknowledged him and a nurse started to take vital signs.  She removed his jacket, and opened his shirt.  He didn’t appear to have any other major wounds which was a relief.  They quickly went through a trauma assessment.  The doctor put on a stethoscope and listened to his lungs.

            “Airway is clear, but breathing is shallow.  Get me some oxygen,” the doctor instructed.  A nurse brought an oxygen mask and put it over Ignis’ face.  The doctor continued the exam.  With gloved hands he delicately examined Ignis’ face.  “Severe ocular trauma, perforation of the right globe likely.”  The doctor turned to the nurse:

            “We need to get him to the hospital immediately and start him on a fluid drip. I want to do exploratory surgery as soon as possible.”  She draped a blanket over the motionless Ignis and started to rush him off. 

            “We’ll do what we can,” the doctor said before chasing after the stretcher.

            Severe trauma. Exploratory surgery?  Prompto felt numb.  Gladio leaned over and held onto his knees.  Sprinting with Ignis over his shoulders had exhausted him.  He looked over at Prompto who was nearly in tears.  Gladio lashed out.

            “Be a man.  Do you think Ignis would stand here crying if it was one of us?”  Prompto felt like he’d be smacked in the face.  He shook his head.  Of course Ignis wouldn’t cry, but Prompto felt Gladio was being unnecessarily cruel.

            “Then don’t,” Gladio could tell he’d gone a bit too far.  He gripped Prompto’s right shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly.  “He’s gonna be alright.”  Prompto nodded in response.  It sounded nice, but neither of them believed it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of my headcanons is that Prompto has a surprising amount of medical knowledge from helping injured animals. There will be more Medical!Prompto later in this story.


	3. Chapter 3

            Ignis slowly opened his eyes and discovered he was lying in a meadow of royal blue sylleblossoms.  The sun was shining brightly making the delicate flowers sparkle.  His glasses were gone, but he could see more vividly and clearly than he ever had.  

            It was astonishingly beautiful _._ He couldn’t remember a time in his life when he felt more peaceful or safe.   The soothing atmosphere made his eyelids feel heavy.  He started to drift off until an angelic voice called his name.

            “Ignis,” she said warmly, “you have to wake up.”  Ignis opened his eyes again and saw a beautiful woman kneeling beside him.

            “Lady Lunafreya,” he tried to move, he wanted to respectfully greet her, but his limbs felt like lead weights.  Her hair fell loosely to her shoulders and she was wearing an elegant white gown.   _Her wedding dress?_ Ignis was having trouble thinking clearly. He stared up into her face.

            “Are we in Tenebrae?” He thought sylleblossoms only grew in Tenebrae.

            “No...we are not in a physical place,” she replied calmly.  Ignis’ former peacefulness was replaced with growing concern.  She noticed his distress and squeezed his hand reassuringly.

            “...not a physical place?”  Ignis waited a moment before finishing his thought. “Is this...the afterlife?”

            “You might call it that.   _My_ mortal life has come to an end,” she said it solemnly, but not with sadness.  Ignis felt his heart sink.  He struggled to sit up.  Luna put an arm around his shoulders to help.

            “Then I have failed you.  Please forgive me.”  She kept her arm around him, comforting him.

            “You did everything you could.  It was not your fate to save me,”  Ignis found little comfort in these words, but he greatly appreciated them.  “All of this was meant to happen.  It is part of the prophecy.”  After a pause he turned to her.

            “And Noctis?”  He couldn't bear it if Noctis had been lost.  She smiled.

            “He defeated Leviathan.  He is alive and well.”  Ignis felt so relieved, but there was another important question to ask.

            “If I am here with you, does that mean I too have passed?”

            “No,” she said as she stood up.  “You are in between.”  

            “In between?”  Ignis was finding it very difficult to grasp what was happening.

            “Yes.  You are between life and death.”  This was a very shocking thing to hear, but he hardly knew how to respond.  “Your friends are trying to save you,” she turned away from him for a moment and looked off into the distance.  

            “You have a difficult journey ahead of you,” she said somberly, “but you must try.  Noctis needs you.”  She said it with great conviction, but Ignis did not need to be convinced.  He would never abandon Noctis if he had even a fraction of life left in him.

            “What must I do?”  He said as he looked up at Luna.  She held out her hand and he took it.  With her help, he managed to stand up.

            “You have to go back.”  Once he was standing in front of her, he noticed just how much taller he was.  It made her seem so much younger and more vulnerable than she had a moment ago.  

            “What is the way back?” He asked, still very confused.  It was difficult to hold on to a thought--much like in a dream.  She pointed to an opening in the distance--he hadn’t noticed it before.

            “You must follow that path.”  The two of them walked towards the opening.  As it came into view, Ignis could see that the pathway led to a dark forest.  He felt nothing but dread when he looked at it.  He suddenly had a powerful desire to stay where he was.

            “You must make your journey soon,” she said, “the longer you stay here the less likely you are to leave it.”

            “Will you walk with me?”  It was a question, but also a plea.

            “I cannot.  Only you can.”  She seemed pained by this.  “I am so happy I got to meet you--even if it was like this.”

            “The pleasure was most certainly mine,” he bowed before her and took her hand.  He lightly kissed it.  He was determined to observe etiquette.

            “Godspeed, Ignis.”  He nodded in response and started to walk towards the forest.  

            “Wait--” He stopped and turned around.  Luna walked towards him and clasped his left hands between both of hers and looked straight into his eyes.  “You must remember not to fall asleep--no matter how tempting it might seem.”  He placed his right hand over hers.

            “I will not fail, Lady Luna.”  She nodded and unclasped his hands.  It was time to go.

* * *

 

            Prompto sat in a chair beside Ignis’ bed.  The hospital was overcrowded, but they’d managed to get him a small private room.  Ignis’ status and role in protecting the citizens of Altissia had accorded him some special treatment.

            It had been over 12 hours since they’d rescued Ignis, but they were just now getting an opportunity to see him.  His eyes and forehead were wrapped in clean bandages.  His usually perfectly coiffed hair was matted and clung to his forehead.  He was still unconscious and that scared Prompto more than anything.  His vital signs had stabilized, but they kept him on oxygen and several IVs.  One was an antibiotic, that much Prompto knew.  He assumed it was purely preventative.  

            Ignis’ familiar Crownsguard attire had been replaced with hospital clothing which looked like ugly pajamas to Prompto.  He was sure Ignis would hate them.  He seemed to be peaceful, though, and that gave Prompto a bit of hope.

            Gladio paced around the room.  He found it impossible to be calm or still. With Ignis out of commission, he was the de facto commander of their small group.

            “You think he can hear us?” Prompto asked as he looked at Ignis’ bandaged face.

            “Probably not.  He’s out cold.”  Prompto disagreed, but he kept it to himself.  Moments later, the doctor they had seen before entered the room.  He was in a hurry.  

            “Good evening gentlemen.”

            “What can you tell us?”

            “He has severe ocular trauma.  We could not determine the exact cause.  The injuries are consistent with burn damage--possibly chemical--but it could also just as likely be blast trauma.  There is no other severe trauma to his body which is, frankly, miraculous if it was a blast.  He has no observable brain damage, but he is in a coma state.  We were unable to awaken him.”

            “Coma?” Gladio asked.  “Is that permanent?”

            “Not necessarily.  It could be a few hours, a few days, a few years.  We just can’t tell for certain.” The doctor explained.  _A few years?_ That wasn’t the news Gladio was hoping to hear.

            “What about his eyes?  Will they heal?” Prompto asked.  

            The right eye--possibly. We have to wait and see, but his left eye is badly damaged. He sustained an open globe injury.  I will reassess in a few days, but we may have to enucleate it.”

            “ _Enucleate?”_ Gladio repeated.

            “Remove the eye,” the doctor tersely replied.  Prompto very nearly threw up.  The doctor moved on to his next question.

            “If he doesn’t wake up soon, he will need to have medical decisions made for him.  Does he have living parents?”

            “Not that I know of,” Gladio replied.

            “A spouse?”

            “Definitely not.”

            “A will, or at least an advance directive?”

            “I don’t think so, maybe.”

            “Well, I advise you find out as soon as possible.  If one cannot be produced, I will have to make the decisions for him.”  Gladio found these questions incredibly stressful. It sounded like they were planning his funeral.   _Why would Iggy have a will? He’s hardly more than 22 years old._

            “Can I stay here for a while?” Prompto asked.

            “Yes, you may.  The nurse will let you know when visiting hours are over.”

            The doctor made a few notes on his clipboard and walked back out into the hall.  Gladio slumped in another chair and sighed.

            “Maybe Noctis would know if Iggy has family who can help,” Prompto suggested. Gladio laughed sardonically

            “Yeah, when he finally wakes up he can tell us what to do about the other guy in a coma,”

            “It’s not funny, Gladio.”  Prompto was rarely serious, but he was in that moment.

            “If you don’t laugh, you’ll cry.”

            “Believe me I do both all the time,” that got a smile from Gladio.

            “I’m going to get some sleep.  You should do the same.”  He stood up and patted Prompto’s shoulder as he passed.  Prompto leaned back in his chair.

            “Willing to bet he still wakes up before you do,” Gladio said as he walked out of the room

            “Ha Ha.”  Prompto closed his eyes and prayed that Gladio was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm approaching his injury in a somewhat realistic way (that is, if he showed up at a modern hospital with it). I'm not sure where Altissia is in terms of medical tech, but I'm going to assume it's pretty current (like everything else in the city). I've actually done a bit of research on eye trauma after starting this--harrowing stuff. I truly feel for anyone who suffers one of these type of injuries.


	4. Chapter 4

The forest seemed remarkably like the Myrlwood to Ignis, but it was more difficult to navigate. The light was very dim thanks to the dense canopy of trees and the paths were narrow. Ignis could hear the sound of creatures in the underbrush, but when he tried to summon his daggers they did not appear. He had to remind himself that he wasn't in a physical space-the rules of his temporal life did not apply. Even so, it _felt_ real. He was getting fatigued from walking up and down the confusing paths.

He had heard more than one story about hikers getting lost in the Myrlwood-never to be seen again. There were certain things that made him anxious. Getting lost was one of them. Ignis liked everything to be in its proper place-including himself. He walked down another winding, overgrown path and reached yet another dead end. He was frustrated and angry. He turned back; this time moving more quickly.

He walked for what felt like hours but never made any progress. He started to make his way back towards the entrance hoping that would help him determine which paths were incorrect, but he couldn't find his way anywhere near the entrance. His anger and frustration slowly transformed into panic. It occurred to him that he might _never_ find his way out. He tried to calm down. _This has to be some kind of puzzle or test._

An entire day must have passed, because the dim light was starting to fade. When it began to get completely dark, Ignis started to feel overwhelming fear. He may not have had any genuine phobias, but he did have a fear of the dark as a young boy. A fear he thought he had mastered. He sat down and hugged his knees to his chest-not a pose his friends would have been used to seeing.

Being a very bright and gifted student, at a young age Ignis was sent to a boarding school populated by the best and the brightest Insomnia had to offer. He never struggled with his studies, but he struggled to adjust to the competitive atmosphere and life away from home. He was just 5 when he started-younger than most of the boys there. One of the first things he learned was how to hide his weaknesses.

They were required to have lights out by 8:30pm each night. The time didn't bother him, but the dark did. At home, his mother had always kept some kind of light on for him. It made him feel safe enough to fall asleep. There were no such amenities at the boarding school. The first night he was so scared that he cried. Naturally, the other boys mocked him. It was cruel, but not unexpected. Even at 5, Ignis couldn't stand to be thought of as weak, so he learned to live without his night light.

No one knew about any of this, of course, except Noctis. He'd been selected to be Noctis' personal adviser when he was just 6. They grew up together; they knew every detail about each other. They were brothers in everything but blood. Even though the two enjoyed roasting each other, as brothers do, some topics were off limits and Ignis' childhood terror of the dark was one of them. Ignis knew quite a few embarrassing things about Noctis he never shared. The two had an understanding that some things needed to be left alone.

He had thought all of this was behind him-his fear of the dark had become a mild source of anxiety, but nothing he couldn't manage. At the moment, it was crippling him. It had gotten so dark, he could barely see anything at all. He closed his eyes and tried to breathe more slowly.

* * *

A beeping monitor quickly brought a staff nurse to Ignis' room. It was late at night, and the floor was quiet. The commotion roused Prompto who had fallen asleep in his chair. The nurse was a nice looking woman, middle aged woman. She wore the typical Altissian nurse's uniform: a grey shirt dress with a small white hat covering her carefully bobby-pinned, auburn hair. She seemed very professional and that gave Prompto some confidence. She checked some monitors and switched off the alarm.

"What's happening?" He asked.

"His heart rate spiked, but it's back to normal. It's possible he just had a nightmare."

"Is he alright?" Prompto asked.

"I believe so, but I will monitor him closely," she turned to face Prompto, "by the way, you should have left a couple of hours ago."

"Oops, I guess I fell asleep."

"I won't tell anyone if you don't." She said with a smile. Prompto liked her already.

"Thanks, uh, what's your name again?"

"Julia," she said quietly, "and you?"

"Prompto," he said as he held out his hand, "Prompto Argentum." She shook his hand.

"It's nice to meet you Prompto." Prompto gestured towards his friend.

"And that's Ignis."

"I do know who he is," she pointed at his chart sitting on a nearby table and smiled.

"Oh yeah. You probably know more about him than I do by now."

"I promise to take good care of him."

"Will you call us when he wakes up?" Prompto didn't bother to wonder _if_ he would wake up.

"Of course." Satisfied with her answer, Prompto quietly went out into the hall and headed for his hotel room. Julia turned to her patient and reviewed his vitals. He seemed so young to her that she found it hard to believe he was one of the chief strategists during the battle with the Empire. She had a great deal of experience, but it still broke her heart to see young men so destroyed by war. She prayed they would be able to help him.

* * *

 

Ignis had calmed down, but he was still unable to make himself continue the search. He was hopeful the dim light would return in a few hours, but he reminded himself he wasn't in Eos and day/night cycles did not exist here. Despite that, he still felt quite tired. He remembered Lady Luna's warning that he should not go back to sleep, but he felt like he could not keep his eyes open. _A short nap can't hurt…_

"Hey Ignis!" The familiar voice instantly awakened Ignis.

"Noct?" He replied sleepily.

"Taking a nap? That's a new one. Maybe you'll stop giving me so much crap about it now."

"How did you get here?" Ignis was very confused and concerned. Noctis ought not to be here-Luna said he was alright.

"Same way you did. I walked." He stretched his hand out. Ignis took it and Noct pulled him to his feet.

"Now come on, I want to do some fishing."

"Fishing? Where in the world do you plan to do that?" Ignis started to follow the prince. He was too confused to bother trying to understand any of it at this point.

"Right this way." Noct started to sprint and Ignis struggled to keep up. They took several crooked turns, but gradually the narrow paths began to open up and more light was filtering in. Noctis headed towards a large opening which seemed to be the source of the light. The prince disappeared into the light and Ignis followed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> About Ignis' secret phobia—I pieced that together from hints in the game about things that make him uneasy. I think it also just brings out the tragedy of his injury even more (but it also makes his eventual recovery more meaningful). I'm curious to hear your thoughts on that one—you might have some other headcanons about what makes him anxious.


	5. Chapter 5

"Did you find anything about his family?" Gladio asked as he observed Ignis lying motionless in his hospital bed, bathed in early morning light. He looked a little better than he had the day before. He was breathing on his own now, but he still had multiple IVs attached to his arms.

"Nope. Nothing yet. But I did have an idea." Prompto walked over to a small side table and picked up a box.

"They put all of his things in here," he started to sift through the contents. There was a wallet, but hardly anything inside. An Insomnian driver's license and some kind of security clearance cards. Nothing that could help them. He held up a delicate necklace. "What's the deal with this? He wears it all the time."

"Not sure. I think King Regis gave it to him."

"That's cool." Prompto carefully placed it back in the box. On the bottom of the box, he spotted Ignis' journal. It must have been in his jacket pocket. It didn't seem to be too damaged, just a bit waterlogged. Prompto picked it up. He'd often seen Ignis writing in it and even using it when he would cook. He had a sinking feeling that Ignis might never get to read its pages again.

"It's his journal," Prompto said somberly.

"Yeah and you shouldn't open it."

"But if there was something that could help us, it's probably in here." Gladio couldn't argue with it but it seemed like such a violation of privacy.

"It's probably just recipes anyway." Prompto observed.

"Probably. It might also be his most personal thoughts."

"I can just gloss over that part."

"You probably wouldn't understand most of the words anyway." Gladio walked over and took the journal from Prompto.

"How about this. We only read it if he isn't awake by tomorrow."

"Alright-that's fair. Besides, I just found his phone. Bound to be something on there." Prompto tested the phone. It still worked, surprisingly.

"Good luck figuring out the passcode. He's obsessive about security."

"What isn't he obsessive about?" Prompto took a seat next to the bed and set to work cracking the code.

* * *

The bright, clear light shining onto the clearing illuminated a small waterfall. There was no question in Ignis' mind now-it was the Myrlwood-or its afterlife equivalent. Noctis, however, was nowhere to be seen. _So he was just a vision, a dream_. Ignis was thankful for the guidance nonetheless.

Seeing and hearing the water reminded him of how thirsty he was. He knelt down and drank from his cupped hands. It's not something he would even consider doing in reality. Myrlwood water was no doubt quite filthy. The chilly water made him feel more awake. He splashed more of it onto his face.

Ignis dried his eyes on his sleeve and looked down at his reflection, but he noticed something strange. He saw a reflection of the Citadel shimmering on the surface of the water. It wasn't there seconds before. Obviously, it was not possible to get used to the peculiarities of this realm of reality. He stood up and looked up into the sky. Sure enough, there it was-the Citadel, off in the distance beyond the waterfall. Lady Lunafreya had said he must return home. Insomnia was his home. The only logical choice was to head for the Citadel. He took off his jacket and walked to the end of the dock. He unbuttoned his cuffs and rolled up his sleeves.

"This is quite undignified," he said out loud. _Talking to myself already._

He jumped off the end of the dock into the chilly water. He wasn't a great swimmer, but he wasn't a bad one (despite what Noctis might say). It didn't take him long to reach the terminus of the falls. He pulled himself up onto one of the large, slippery rocks. He stood up carefully and started to climb _up_ the waterfall. Yet another thing he would never attempt in the physical world. He battled the rushing water and managed to pull himself up onto solid ground.

Ignis breathed a sigh of relief and rose to his feet. He had quite a distance to walk to reach the Citadel.

* * *

The daylight was starting to wane in Altissia. Julia was just starting to make her rounds. Ignis was next. All of his vitals were good. She straightened his blanket and carefully adjusted his pillow. She gently squeezed his hand before turning to leave. Prompto was just arriving. He watched her for a moment before walking in.

"Julia, do you think he can hear us at all?"

"I think he can, yes. I've had some coma patients who say they could hear everything." That scared Prompto a bit. _Everything?_ "I'll be back to check on him in a little while."

"Thanks, Julia." Prompto took a seat in his now familiar spot. He pulled Ignis' phone back out and sat it next to him in the chair.

"Hey, Ignis," he began, "I just wanted to say I'm sorry for letting you do all the work. I can be lazy and obnoxious sometimes and I know I annoy you a lot. But I promise I'll help you more after you wake up, OK?" He patted Ignis' hand when he was finished speaking. No response, but he still felt better.

"And there's one other thing. I'm sorry for trying to break into your phone." Prompto leaned back in his chair and started trying more passcode combinations.

* * *

Paradoxically, the path along the stream led Ignis directly into the Citadel. He couldn't recall the moment the scenery began to change, but before he knew it, the rocky stream valley had transformed into one of the muted, gray corridors that were so familiar to him. The entire palace seemed to be empty. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to be looking for, so he started to make his way towards the throne room.

There was a large anteroom just outside of the throne room which was filled with paintings of the prophecy. Just before Ignis stepped inside, he heard footsteps. It didn't frighten him; in fact the footsteps sounded familiar. Whoever it was, walked with a cane and that brought one person to mind-King Regis.

He walked into the familiar room. He'd spent quite a lot of time looking at the paintings over the years, but Noctis had never liked to join him. Noct disliked the room because he said the paintings made his father so sad. Ignis always thought it was an excuse not to study the art (Noct had even defaced one of the paintings by signing it), but as he stood observing his king look at one of the paintings, he understood what Noctis meant.

"Your Majesty," Ignis intoned as he bowed. Regis turned from the painting he was viewing towards his son's advisor.

"Ignis," he said with a smile, "I knew you would make it."

"You've been waiting for me?"

"Yes, but not so very long." Ignis had known of Regis' passing for months, but seeing him here, in this afterlife realm, made it more real. He felt a lump form in his throat, but he wouldn't allow himself to cry in front of his king.

"I must admit I have found the journey challenging…..and confusing."

"I'm afraid it is only going to become more challenging." Regis replied. Ignis walked alongside the king and had a look at the painting. It was titled "Genesis". It depicted the king of light triumphing over the daemons with his loyal companions alongside. It was a striking painting, and one Ignis had looked at many times before.

"When did you get taller than me?" Regis observed with a smile.

"I'm not certain, your majesty."

"I remember when you were a little boy. Where has all that time gone?" There was real sadness in his voice now. Ignis had always looked up to Regis as a young boy.

"Sometimes, it doesn't seem so long ago," Ignis observed, "especially when Noctis is acting childish." They both smiled at that. Silence fell between them as they observed the painting once again.

"I'm afraid I haven't treated you fairly." Regis began, not looking away from the painting.

"You have given me everything I have, your grace."

"I gave you responsibilities, yes. Probably more than a young boy should have had. I expected you to raise my son when I was unable. I've never properly thanked you." Ignis was taken aback by the declaration. He suddenly felt quite overwhelmed. He hadn't realized just how much Regis had depended on him.

"I am honored to serve you, and the prince."

"You have shared Noctis' sufferings your whole life, Ignis," Regis turned to face him, "and sometimes unjustly."

Ignis suspected he knew what the king was referring to. Noctis often snuck out of the Citadel to tour the city. Ignis always followed-trying to bring the prince home. When they were inevitably caught, Ignis was always punished along with Noctis and often in harsher ways.

"I feel guilty for punishing you when I knew you weren't the one responsible."

"I can't say I didn't enjoy Noct's impromptu tours. Sometimes I deserved to be punished as much as he did."

"Hardly. I once forbade you from joining a trip to Altissia, if you recall. It was too cruel. It pains me to think of it."

Ignis did recall. King Regis had given Ignis permission to join a political delegation visiting the famed city. He was very much looking forward to the trip. He'd never been outside of Insomnia. Just a few days before the delegation was to depart, he and Noctis had been out until nearly midnight. The king was incensed. Noctis was strongly reprimanded, but Ignis had been forbidden from joining the delegation going to Altissia. When Ignis learned of his punishment, he was crushed. Nevertheless, he accepted it gracefully and spent the time practicing his weapons training instead.

"It's good to learn how to accept disappointment." Ignis said sincerely.

"Yes, but I didn't want to be the one to teach it."

"And in any case, I've seen Altissia now." Regis couldn't respond to that. He knew more about Ignis' condition than he himself did. He returned his gaze to the painting.

"I punished you, as unfair as it was, because I knew _you could bear it._ "

"Your majesty?" Ignis was a bit surprised by this revelation.

"I wanted Noctis to learn how to suffer with dignity and grace. I knew you could show him. I hope you can forgive me for expecting that of you."

"I'm honored you believed I had such strength."

"You have more than you know. And you will need every ounce of it for what's to come." Ignis felt his heart rate increasing.

"The prophecy foretells that one of the warriors of light will be badly wounded." Regis gestured towards a figure in the painting. One of the warriors was hunched over, huddled against one of his compatriots. The sight of it made Ignis' heart sink.

"I'm sorry it had to be you," Regis said, "but I ought to have known." Ignis felt genuine fear. He had been so focused on finding his way through the dreamlike maze, he hadn't considered what he would have to face once he awoke.

"Your majesty….what awaits me?"

"Suffering awaits you, both physical and mental. But please know this. Your suffering, will lighten Noctis' burden. Just as it did when you were children. It doesn't seem fair, but it is your fate."

"If...my suffering will lighten the burden Noctis must bear, then I gladly accept my fate." Regis pulled him into an embrace. It surprised Ignis, but he was glad for it.

"I want you to know that I've always loved you like a son. I regret having never told you when I lived. I've always been so proud of you." They were words Ignis had always wanted to hear. He rested his head on Regis' shoulder, and didn't bother to fight the tears that started to well in his eyes.

"You will wake up very shortly," he said in a warm, fatherly voice, "but don't be afraid. You have the strength necessary. Have faith." Regis held him a few moments longer and gently pulled away from the embrace.

"It gives me such peace to know you will be with my son in this journey." Suddenly, an extremely bright light shined from behind the king. He started to disappear into the blinding light.

"Your majesty, wait-

"Godspeed, Ignis. Godspeed." Regis' voice sounded so far away. Ignis started to reach for him, but the light was so bright he had to shield his eyes. In moments, he was completely enveloped…

* * *

Prompto had tried every number and letter combination he could think of for the passcode. He even tried the Regalia license plate number. Nothing. He set it aside and leaned back in his chair.

"I give up, Ignis. You win. A psychic couldn't figure out that code." He pulled a deck of cards from his pocket and started to shuffle.

"How about some cards? I promise I won't cheat." He dealt himself five cards and was about to do the same for the comatose Ignis, but he was startled to hear a voice.

"Y-your majesty…" Ignis said, his voice weak and scratchy. Prompto thought he was hearing things at first, but he noticed that Ignis' fingers moved slightly. He was definitely waking up.

"Ignis? Can you hear me?" He stood up and moved closer to his friend's face.

"King Regis?" Ignis asked, still very disoriented.

"Sorry to disappoint, but it's just your good buddy Prompto." As Ignis began to regain consciousness, the monitors started to beep. Ignis' heart rate was spiking. He clumsily reached for the IVs in his arm. Prompto started to panic.

"Julia! Hey Julia! He's awake!" It wasn't proper to shout in a hospital like that, but it brought the nurse right away. Julia rushed to Ignis' side and gently held his shoulders down.

"Hello, Ignis. I am a nurse and my name is Julia. You are in a hospital in Altissia," she spoke slowly, and calmly. "You have been in a coma for two and half days." Ignis heard her voice and tried to remain calm, but he was disoriented and anxious. The monitor showed that his heart rate was still spiking.

"I-I can't see anything." He started to reach for the bandages over his eyes and Julia gently, but firmly held his arms down.

"Please remain calm. You are safe here." It sounded like a rehearsed script to Prompto. Likely something they were instructed to say to coma patients.

"Prompto," Julia said, "you have to go now." Prompto nodded and stepped out of the room as the doctor walked in.

"We need to sedate him. Now." The doctor instructed. _Sedate him?! He just woke up._ Prompto couldn't believe it. They closed the door and Prompto reluctantly made his way back to the waiting room hoping and praying that Ignis would be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story about Noctis defacing the painting is actually in-game, you just have to spend some time in that anteroom during ch. 14. As for the story about Ignis getting punished, you learn in the Parting Ways web novel that Ignis was frequently punished alongside Noctis. I invented the story about losing his chance to visit Altissia, but it seemed like something Regis might do and something that would have have been really tough on young Iggy. As always, thanks for reading and commenting!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is some mild medical stuff in this chapter—nothing too graphic! Ignis starts his slow return to the realm of the conscious in this chapter. As always, thanks for reading and commenting—it is appreciated!

 

The mild sedative put Ignis into a "twilight" state of consciousness. He was aware of what was happening around him, but he felt numb and placid. It ensured that he wouldn't panic and attempt to remove his IVs-or the bandages around his eyes. Confident that his patient was stable both mentally and physically, the doctor decided to inform Ignis of his condition and ask a few questions. Julia stood next to the doctor, making notes in her patient's file.

"Can you hear me?" The doctor asked, calmly.

"Yes." Ignis replied, barely moving a muscle. He felt very disconnected from himself and the situation.

"What is your name?" The doctor wanted to assess his mental state and memory first.

"Ignis Scientia."

"Do you know where you are?"

"Altissia." Ignis found it difficult answering even simple questions.

"Good. Do you remember being injured?"

"N-no. I can't remember…" It scared Ignis that he couldn't remember anything. It was as though his memories were water slipping through his fingers.

"That's alright," the doctor leaned towards Julia, and said quietly, "post traumatic amnesia." She nodded and added the note to his chart. Ignis had overheard. _Amnesia?_

"What happened to me?" Ignis wasn't sure he really wanted to know the answer.

"Severe ocular trauma. Your left eye was badly burned. I could not determine the cause-anything you can remember would help." The doctor reported in a matter of fact tone. Ignis knew this news was very troubling, but he couldn't feel anything. Not physically, not emotionally. The morphine and sedatives were insulating him.

"Your right eye, thankfully, wasn't as badly damaged but the cornea is scarred." The physician continued.

"When will my eyesight return?" Ignis asked hazily. There was a long pause. Much longer than Ignis had hoped for.

"I cannot say for certain. Once the bandages come off I will reassess." The doctor didn't want to tell Ignis his true opinion. Not yet.

"How much longer?" Ignis asked.

"Several days or so." Julia interjected. That was too much time as far as Ignis was concerned, but he could barely move his fingers at the moment.

"Prince Noctis…." Ignis began, his voice still weak and soft.

"Prince Noctis is safe. He's in much better shape than you, in fact." The doctor replied bluntly.

"You don't need to worry about his majesty right now," Julia explained, "you must rest and recover." The doctor made a few notes about dosages and left the room.

Ignis heard footsteps leaving the room. He didn't know Julia was still there. Suddenly, he felt isolated and claustrophobic. Everything was dark. He just wanted to tear the bandages from his eyes and see. Even with the heavy dose of sedative, his heart rate was increasing.

"Ignis," he turned his head toward the voice, "I'm still here." Julia said as she gently squeezed his hand. It comforted him.

"Would you like me to stay for a while?"

"If it's no trouble," he replied. He didn't want to admit just how panicked he was beginning to feel. It wasn't like him to request anything, but the thought of being trapped in permanent darkness was overwhelming. He needed the company now.

"It's no trouble at all." She kept holding his hand and waited for him to fall asleep.

* * *

 

Ignis spent the next couple of days gradually waking. The sedative was wearing off and his mind was becoming more and more alert-much to Julia's chagrin. Ignis was quickly becoming one of her favorite patients, but also one of her most difficult. She could already tell he pushed himself too hard and had a strong stubborn streak. Those weren't necessarily bad traits, but when you are trying to get your patient to rest and recover, it can lead to more than a few arguments.

Julia arrived early in the morning to change Ignis' bandages. As she expected, he was already asking to leave his room. He was sitting on the edge of his bed when she entered.

"Nurse-

"Julia. Please, just call me Julia."

"Julia, I need you to bring me my clothes." Julia could predict where this was leading.

"As I told you last night, your clothes are being mended and cleaned. I'll bring them to you in due time."

"You have astonishingly inefficient launderers at this hospital." They both knew the clothes were clean and ready to be returned. Julia had no intention of bringing them back until she was certain he was ready to leave the hospital.

"I'd prefer to have my clothes before I go outside, but if you force me to leave in pajamas, then I will." The truth was, Ignis was starting to feel like a prisoner in his room. He didn't even have the comfort of reading. He felt trapped.

"You'll do no such thing. Your mind may feel alert, Ignis, but your body is still recovering. You've been through a great deal."

"When Noctis awakes, I must depart. That could happen at any moment. I must learn how to...navigate without my sight...it may be some time before it returns. " _Before_ _it returns._ Julia didn't hold out much hope for his sight coming back, but there was a chance and she had no intention of taking that hope from him.

"I understand your urgency, but you must give yourself time to heal." She looked at the nearly untouched tray of food on his bedside table.

"If you want to recover quickly, you're going to have to eat. You've barely touched your breakfast." Her tone was motherly, not angry.

"I don't have much of an appetite," he sounded almost apologetic. Ignis had commanded Noctis to eat his food enough times that it made him feel sheepish to be guilty of meal skipping himself. Julia knit her brow. She expected him to be eating light for a while, but she was concerned it could become a long term problem.

"Your friends told me that you're a fine cook yourself. You must have an excellent palate." She observed.

"Certainly better than average." He replied.

"Maybe that's the problem. Hospital food is hardly gourmet." Ignis wanted to object, but Julia went on. "Would you like me to bring you something from one of the cafes?" It did sound much more appealing.

"Are you allowed to do that?"

"Strictly speaking, no. But you don't have any dietary restrictions right now. There'd be no harm in it."

"If you insist," Ignis replied.

"I will bring you something tomorrow." He could hear Julia arranging some medical instruments-the unmistakable metal clank, as they were placed on a tray. He felt his pulse increase slightly.

"I'm going to have to change your bandages." She'd done it once before, but Ignis was so out of it at the time that he couldn't remember much.

"It will be uncomfortable, but only briefly," she assured him. He straightened a bit. He was tense, in part because he couldn't see what was happening.

"When will these be coming off permanently?" He asked as she began to carefully unravel the bandages. His hair was still a matted mess; she hadn't yet been able to wash it. She expected Ignis to insist he could do that for himself.

"It could be as soon as the next day or two." That was a relief. He hated wearing the bandages. He stayed quiet while she worked, but Julia could tell his discomfort was increasing. The wound around his left eye was a very painful one. She numbed the area around the burn before debridement, but it was painful nonetheless.

"So," she began as she cleansed the wound with antiseptic, "do you have a girlfriend back in Insomnia?" Ignis winced at the question and the antiseptic.

"At present, no." Romance and relationships were not things Ignis spoke about frequently-even to his closest friends.

"Really? I'm surprised. A handsome man like you," she irrigated the wound and carefully cleaned it with a cotton ball. Ignis suddenly found himself feeling defensive.

"I don't have much time for a relationship," it sounded like an excuse, even to him. "I'd like to devote more attention to one than I can at present."

"You don't have to explain-I just thought you'd have to fight off throngs of young women." Julia was quickly discovering, like everyone who knew him, how much fun it was to tease Ignis.

"I can't say that has been my experience," Ignis cringed when he thought of what his comrades would be saying about this.

"You're a romantic aren't you?" Julia asked after a pause.

"I beg your pardon?"

"It sounds like you might be waiting for someone special," Julia took a curette off the tray. Even though most people wouldn't guess it, Ignis _did_ have a romantic streak. He had been taught court etiquette and that included quite a bit of gallantry. While Noctis found it completely outdated and ridiculous, Ignis actually enjoyed being chivalrous. The truth was, though, there was no woman in his life at the moment and he hadn't yet had anything approaching a serious attachment. It's not something he felt like thinking about at the moment.

"If this conversation is designed to help make me comfortable, it is failing." Ignis observed. Julia laughed softly.

"It's not meant to make you comfortable, it's meant to distract you.'

"Ah. A fine strategy." He instinctively pulled away when she scraped the edge of his wound.

"I'm almost finished," she said soothingly. She switched from the curette to an antiseptic laced cotton ball. A much more comfortable implement. She fetched fresh gauze and started to carefully wind it around his eyes and forehead.

"The wounds are healing quite nicely-better than expected," she said as she finished wrapping the new bandages, "but it's going to be more painful for a while."

Ignis just nodded in response. It _was_ quite a bit more painful after the cleaning and he didn't want to show it. Julia disposed of the old bandages and set aside the tray. She started to review Ignis' medication schedule. Ignis was uncharacteristically quiet.

"Ignis, are you alright? Are you in pain?" She asked. He was still sitting at the edge of the bed, but he was hunched forward more than he had been and a couple of shades paler. The truth was he'd been feeling varying degrees of nausea since he woke up from the coma, but in that moment it was becoming a bit unbearable.

"No-just feeling a little nauseated."

Julia already knew that Ignis had a penchant for understatement, so she knew it had to be quite a bit worse than "a little". She reached for a basin and sat down beside him on the bed. She held the basin in front of him and gently rubbed his back. Ignis fought the dizzying nausea as long as he could, but he couldn't help it. He got sick. He was mortified-it was such an undignified business to begin with, but in front of someone else? Despite the embarrassment, he was thankful for Julia's comforting presence.

"Feeling better?" She asked when it was over. He nodded and she took the basin away.

Ignis was surprised how weak he felt. He eased back into his bed and laid his head flat against the pillows. Maybe he wasn't quite ready to go out.

"I'm sorry for that," he said when he heard Julia re-enter the room.

"There is nothing to apologize for. I'm just glad I was here to help. I am a nurse, remember." She handed him a warm wash cloth and he gratefully accepted it. When he was through with it, she took it back and put a glass of water in his hand.

"Nausea is a side effect of most of the medications you are on," she observed.

"I suspect those dreadful pain pills are to blame." He answered as he eased his aching head back onto the pillows.

"I'll talk to your doctor about changing the dose. And see if he'll order you an anti-nausea drug." _More drugs._ That's not what Ignis wanted to hear.

"Thank you." He politely replied.

"Get some rest." Julia said as she pulled a light blanket over him. He didn't object this time. He didn't feel up to going for a walk at the moment.

"I'll bring you something to eat a little later." Julia informed him. He nodded and closed his eyes; hoping for some peaceful sleep.

* * *

 

"Hey Iggy, mind if I have some of this?" Prompto asked as he gestured towards a lunch tray by Ignis' bed. There was a bowl of soup and some crusty bread that looked pretty appetizing. Ignis shook his head.

"Help yourself." Ignis replied, assuming his blonde friend was referring to his uneaten meal. He was feeling a little better than he did in the morning. He was sitting up against his pillows, but didn't quite feel like he had the energy to get out of bed.

Gladio walked in with a drink he picked up at a vending machine. He noticed Prompto wolfing in a big piece of bread.

"Prompto, he's supposed to be eating that." Gladio accurately observed.

"He said I could have it!" Prompto replied.

"Feeding Prompto your meals-food that good here?" Gladio said sarcastically.

"I'm not sure. I haven't been able to keep much of it down." Ignis replied sardonically. Suddenly, Prompto wasn't so hungry. He sat the bread back down.

"Now I have to taste it." Gladio said as he picked up the soup bowl and drank from it. It was lukewarm, but it tasted alright.

"It ain't cup noodles, but it's pretty good. You should eat it." Gladio suggested. Ignis was used to telling other people to remember to eat.

"Maybe later."

"Total Noct move." Gladio wasn't pulling any punches.

"I'm not particularly hungry at the moment." Ignis didn't like getting hectored. He wasn't avoiding the food because he was picky. He was convinced he might get sick if he tried to eat. Gladio knew that, of course, he was just afraid Ignis wouldn't start healing if he didn't eat.

"Feeling up to an outing?" Prompto asked, trying to ease the tension.

"Yes, it would be nice to go for a walk." Ignis moved to the edge of his bed and let his feet touch the ground. He was about to stand when Gladio held his shoulder down.

"Julia said you should use a wheelchair-just for now." Gladio explained. Ignis sighed.

"If those are the terms of my release, then I will acquiesce." Ignis didn't want to admit that he felt too weak to stand for long anyway. Gladio helped him to the wheelchair. Prompto took the handles.

"We can't leave the hospital, but there is this outdoor porch thing-

"A colonnade," Ignis explained. There were many beautiful ones in Altissia. He tried to ignore the overwhelming sadness he felt when he thought about never seeing one again.

"Yeah, one of those. We can go there." Prompto said.

"It would be good to get fresh air," Ignis agreed.

Prompto wheeled Ignis, a little too quickly, out of the ICU and out towards the colonnade. Prompto chattered the whole time mostly about food and a little about dogs and occasionally, _King's Knight_. It was the kind of vacuous small talk that Ignis thought he hated, but found himself more and more thankful for it. It distracted him, and comforted him.

Gladio was mostly quiet. He was observing Ignis, trying to assess his good friend's condition. He was very troubled. Ignis seemed tired and weak. His mood was very low-as it would be for anyone in his situation. Gladio thought when Ignis awoke that he would make some kind of miraculous recovery-eyesight and all. It was not a realistic hope, but if Ignis didn't make major improvements quickly, there was no way he could join them when they left for Tenebrae. He didn't say any of this, but he was sure Ignis must be thinking it too.

"Here we are," Prompto reported as they stepped out into the colonnade. He parked the wheelchair close to the edge with a great view of the ocean. Ignis couldn't see, but he could still feel the warmth of the sun and could smell the sea air. Prompto sat on the ledge, enjoying the view. Even in its damaged state, Altissia was beautiful. Ignis quietly enjoyed the feeling of sunlight. The warmth lifted his spirits.

Gladio leaned over the ledge and stared. He had no love for the city. It might be beautiful, but not to him. It was a place of pain and destruction. He wanted to leave it as soon as possible.

"Hey Ignis, what is the name of that one soup you make with the potatoes?" Prompto asked, always thinking about the next meal. He didn't reply. "Ignis?"

"He's asleep." Gladio observed. Ignis had dozed off.

"Should we take him back?" Prompto asked hesitantly.

"Yeah, probably." Gladio sounded a little defeated.

"Maybe I'll just let him nap here for a bit. I think he wanted some fresh air."

"Alright. Just don't leave him out here. I'm going to go check on Noctis." Gladio patted Ignis' shoulder and walked down the colonnade towards an exit. Prompto returned to gazing at the view. Ignis woke up about twenty minutes later.

"Napping, not eating right. I think you and Noctis switched bodies." Prompto observed.

"Very funny."

"We better head back. You were only supposed to be out for an hour." Prompto pushed him more slowly on the return trip; he knew Ignis didn't want to go back to his room.

"Prompto, I have a request." It was strange for him to ask for anything.

"Yeah?"

"You said you wanted to help me more."

"You heard that?"

"I have a memory of it, yes." It was getting more difficult for Ignis to separate his coma-state memories from his "real" memories. He hadn't yet told his friends about any of what he had experienced. He suspected they would dismiss it as a dream, but it certainly didn't feel like a dream to him.

"Well I guess I have to now." Prompto said lightly.

"Once these bandages come off, I will be allowed to move more freely. I'm going to need a little help at first, would you be willing to assist me?"

"Of course, buddy. It will be fun." Ignis doubted that very much, but he was thankful for the help.

"Thank you, Prompto."

"I do have one request."

"What's that?"

"Save me any and all pudding they give you. I don't know what it is about hospital cafeterias, but they always have the _best_ pudding." Ignis couldn't suppress a smile.

"That is a deal I can happily accept." Ignis relaxed his head against the back of the chair and thought about how one might recreate the unique, synthetic flavor of cafeteria pudding.


	7. Chapter 7

"Ignis, you're supposed to hold onto my arm," Prompto said as they walked down one of the long hospital hallways. Ignis walked just behind Prompto, a cane in his right hand. He was just beginning to learn how to use one. The physical therapist had shown him more than one way to use it, but so far he found he preferred the constant contact approach.

"I know, Prompto, but I need to learn how to do this on my own," he kept the cane at the advised distance in front of him and let it touch the floor the whole time he walked. He found it very difficult to concentrate on anything else while he was using it. They warned him about that too. Eventually, it would become second nature, Julia had assured him. He had hoped he wouldn't need it long enough for it to become second nature.

"Iggy, look out!" Prompto shouted, just in time to keep Ignis from walking into the door jamb. Prompto gripped Ignis' upper arm and helped reorient him.

"Maybe a little slower," Prompto suggested. Ignis nodded. He wasn't doing badly, but not nearly well enough to continue on their journey. He was determined to be ready to go when Noctis recovered.

"There's a big group of people up ahead, maybe hang on to me for a minute," Prompto suggested. Ignis didn't object, he didn't want to crash into innocent bystanders. He gripped Prompto's forearm just above his elbow. Prompto did his best to guide him, but Ignis still bumped into a nurse as they passed by.

"I beg your pardon," Ignis said, turning his head in her direction.

"There you are," Julia said. Ignis recognized her voice immediately. He would have to rely more on hearing now.

"The doctor is ready to see you; it's time to take the bandages off," she happily reported.

"Prompto," Ignis said, "thank you for your help-

"But I have to go now, yeah I know. Good luck buddy," he replied and headed for the elevator. Julia took his arm and started walking towards the exam room.

"How is it going so far?" She asked.

"Reasonably well, I think, but I need to get outdoors. That will be the real test," Ignis said. Julia knew the likelihood of Ignis figuring out how to navigate on his own in just a few days was not very likely, but she had given up on trying to convince him.

"Did you enjoy the espresso and croissant?" Julia asked, referring to the technically forbidden breakfast she brought him from a cafe.

"Yes, very much," he replied.

"Good, then I'll bring it for you again," Julia was genuinely pleased she had found something he wanted to eat.

They stepped inside an exam room where the doctor was waiting and she helped Ignis to the table. They exchanged pleasantries and Julia removed the bandages. The removal of the bandages made his entire head throb.

"I'm very pleased with the healing. Better than expected. You can thank your youth and good health for that," the doctor said flatly.

"It will leave a significant scar, but plastic surgery will help with that," he continued. This doctor had poor bedside manner. He shined a light directly into Ignis' right eye. Ignis could sense the light a little, but barely. The scarring over his cornea was unfortunately quite severe.

"I've never seen anything quite like that," the doctor reported. Not surprisingly, it was an unnerving thing to hear. The doctor went through the rest of the exam. When the doctor pulled the lid of his right eye open, Ignis sharply drew in a breath and pulled away. The pain took him by surprise.

"I think that's enough for now," the doctor said, "you are healing up quite nicely overall. I'll be discharging you soon." Julia was surprised by that announcement. She didn't think Ignis would be ready to leave for some time.

"What of my vision?" Ignis asked, surprised the question hadn't been addressed. The doctor hesitated.

"I'm not sure," he said, "I need to study the data more." That was most definitely not what Ignis wanted to hear. The doctor said a few words to Julia he couldn't quite hear before leaving.

"OK, Ignis, now we can finally wash your hair," Julia said.

"I can hardly wait," Ignis replied sarcastically.

* * *

When Gladio walked in the room, Ignis was stretched out on his bed looking healthier and more comfortable than he had a couple of days before. His eyes were closed and he had earbuds in tethered to the phone sitting next to him. It was the first time Gladio had seen him without his bandages. It startled him. There was a large, grisly looking wound over his left eye. It looked like it had been badly burned-the eye was nearly fused shut. It was like the skin had just been peeled from his face. He had another gash over the bridge of his nose and a small slit over his right eyebrow.

"Is someone there?" Ignis asked, instinctively opening his right eye.

"It's just me," Gladio replied. Ignis slipped the earbuds out and sat up a little more. There was a long pause as Gladio stared at Ignis' right eye. It was a completely different color, almost iridescent blue. The iris was no longer visible which sent a chill down Gladio's spine.

"Is it that bad?" Ignis asked, inferring that Gladio must be staring at his scars.

"Nah, it's not so bad," Gladio didn't see the point in alarming him more. Ignis reached for the pair of sunglasses Julia had brought for him and slipped them on. He hoped that would cover his wounds-he didn't like to be stared at.

"How is Noctis?" Ignis wanted to change the subject.

"Same. Still sleeping, but still doing alright," Gladio replied.

"The effort of defeating Leviathan must have drained every ounce of strength he had," Ignis observed. He still didn't quite understand how Noctis, or Regis, were able to draw strength from the crystal. No one quite understood.

"Looks like you're doing better anyway," Gladio looked at the mostly eaten lunch tray on the bedside table, "developing a taste for the soup?"

"I'm developing a taste for getting my strength back anyway," he replied.

"Speaking of that," Gladio said as he walked closer to the bed, "I talked to Iris earlier today." Ignis didn't see the connection.

"Is she still in Caem?"

"Yes, she loves it there, actually," Gladio replied

"That's good to hear," Ignis responded. He had always liked Gladio's sister; she was kind and seemed so full of life.

"Did you like it there?" Gladio asked. Ignis suddenly didn't like the direction the conversation was taking.

"It was a pretty place-with remarkably good access to a farmer's market," he answered.

"Well," Galdio said as he started to pace, "Iris had an idea."

"Yes?" Ignis already had a good idea of where this was going.

"She thinks it would be good for you to come stay with her, Cid and Talcott at Caem for a while," Gladio said as he braced for Ignis' counterargument.

"Out of the question-I must remain by Noctis' side," Ignis didn't raise his voice, but there was a bit of anger there nonetheless.

"Relax, it was just an idea. She thought it might be nicer for you to be taken care of by a friend than by these total strangers," Gladio replied.

"Taken care of?" Ignis repeated, voice full of derision, "like some sort of dying animal?"

"Don't be such an ass-she just wants to help," Gladio returned, his own temper was kicking in now.

"She is very kind and thoughtful, but my place is not in Caem, it's here with the Crownsguard," Ignis said, attempting to make his voice even and calm.

"Would you just think about it a bit?" Gladio decided that there would be no convincing him yet.

"I'll consider it," Ignis replied coolly.

"Thanks," Gladio replied, "I'll let you get back to...whatever you were doing." Gladio turned and left the room, feeling a little guilty and a little annoyed about the whole conversation.

Ignis put his earbuds back in-he was listening to a book by an archaeologist about hidden royal tombs. He found it difficult to concentrate after the conversation, though. _He's going to try to leave me behind…_

* * *

After Ignis tripped over the same chair twice in one turn around his room, he decided to stop practicing with his cane for the night. The more tired he became, the more difficult visualizing by memory was. He found his way back to the bed and settled in. He was happy he would be leaving the next day, but it was also a bit frightening.

Moments later, there was a knock at the door. His doctor stepped in almost immediately after.

"Good evening, I hope I didn't wake you," he said and took a seat in the chair next to the bed.

"No, not at all," Ignis replied as he sat up and moved to the edge of his bed.

"I had a chance to review your case with some colleagues of mine," the doctor began, "and I wanted to share that with you."

"What did you find?"

"I'm afraid it's not good news. The scarring on your right cornea is so severe, that it is very unlikely to heal," he replied. Ignis felt his heart sink.

"What does that mean for my eyesight?" Ignis already knew the answer, but he hoped there would be some other possibility.

"The likelihood of your sight returning is extremely unlikely," the doctor replied in a very professional manner.

"Isn't there a surgery, or some therapy I could try?" Ignis asked. His anxiety was apparent.

"A cornea transplant might help," the doctor replied. That gave Ignis a little hope, but the waiting list for something like that had to be quite long.

"But," the doctor began again, "even with a cornea transplant, your vision would be compromised. There is damage to the retina, and the iris too."

"Are you saying there is no hope for my vision?" Ignis wanted a direct answer.

"I wouldn't say there is no hope, miracles can happen," the doctor replied. He wasn't trying to be sarcastic, but it came across that way. Ignis didn't respond. What could he say? The doctor stood up and squeezed Ignis' shoulder.

"I'm sorry, I know this is quite a shock," he said, "you should try to get some rest." The doctor left the room, and closed the door.

Ignis leaned forward and buried his face in his hands. It felt like he'd been punched in the gut. _In the dark...forever? No hope?_ He felt completely overwhelmed. Tears stung his eyes. It was painful; the tear ducts of his left eye had been damaged and his right was very sore. He gently pressed his right eye against his sleeve.

He tried to calm his breathing. It helped a little, but not much. He found himself missing the comforting presence of King Regis and Lady Luna, which he experienced during his coma. _Was that even real?_ He had to wonder. The king had told him that he was strong enough to bear this trial, but he was beginning to doubt that.

He climbed back into his bed and rested his head on the pillows. He didn't realize how much he had been holding onto the hope that he might recover some vision until that hope was taken from him. He had learned at a very young age that indulging an emotion only made things more painful so he fought the fear and despair that was crushing his heart.

He tried to think of ways that his life could still go on-that he could still perform his role as Noctis' adviser and chamberlain. _I've still got my mind_ , _my knowledge and experience_ , he thought, _and physical strength_. But physical strength could only get you so far on a battlefield without your vision.

Thinking about ways in which he could still be useful inevitably brought to mind ways in which he could no longer be useful. No more driving. That pained him quite a lot. He had actually really enjoyed driving, but Notics and Prompto could drive too. He could no longer do the cooking. No one else could perform that task like he could. When he considered that fact for a moment, he was unable to go on unemotionally.

He turned on to his side and fought the tears, but he couldn't stop himself. How could he cook without his sight? It was unthinkable. Cooking was a duty he had taken on, but it was more than that. It was his hobby and his passion. His mind wandered to his journal filled with recipes he'd developed over time. Not only would he not be able to make those recipes, he wouldn't even be able to read the words.

_Reading_. It was one of his greatest pleasures. He would never be able to enjoy it again. The painful tears were flowing more steadily. He started to think about things that weren't as strategically significant, but were equally personally significant. He would never see the beauty of a sunrise again, an ocean view, the Insomnia skyline at night, a painting, or a perfectly plated dish. His tears slowed, but his emotional pain was profound. He felt like his life was being drained out of him.

Then another thought terrified him. _What if I forget what these things look like?_ It had only been days since he'd lost his sight. He could still see things so clearly in his mind's eye, but that could fade. He might even forget what familiar people looked like. He decided to focus his emotional energy on remembering every detail of everything important in his life. His friends' faces, his favorite dishes, Insomnia, Duscae at sunrise- anything important to him.

He closed his eyes and imagined all of those things in as much detail as he could, and hoped for the peace of sleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The feels! I'm making an assumption here that Ignis already knew that his vision wasn't going to come back, despite his apparent hopefulness on the train. We'll see in the coming chapters why he decided to keep it to himself. As always, thanks for reading and commenting!


	8. Chapter 8

Ignis was lying motionless in his bed with one arm draped over his eyes when Julia arrived early in the morning. She was surprised to find him so lethargic. He'd been up at 6 am the past two days.

"Good morning," she said as she sat a delicious looking croissant on his tray, "I brought your breakfast." He pushed himself into a sitting position and tried to wake up a little. He hadn't slept well.

"Thank you," he replied instinctively, but he did not show interest in eating. Julia picked up an espresso in a small to-go cup and gently placed it in his right hand. Ignis closed his grip around the cup.

"It looks like you could use that," she said. He nodded and took a sip. His head was throbbing again. He hadn't had a pain pill in some time and didn't intend to take any more. They made him quite sick and he'd rather deal with the pain.

"I brought your clothes back-all clean and mended," she reported. Ignis didn't react; he just kept sipping the espresso. She draped the garment bag over the chair near his bed.

"I thought you would be quite excited about that. You've been demanding them since you woke up," she commented.

"I am glad to have them back," he finally replied.

"Are you alright? Are you feeling ill again?" Something was clearly wrong.

"No, I'm just tired," he responded. It was true, but it wasn't the whole truth. She put the back of her hand to his forehead. It felt cool.

"Are you nervous about being discharged today? If you think you need to stay, I can speak to the doctor," Julia said. She personally thought Ignis needed to stay another week.

"No, I am happy to be leaving," he said. He wanted to tell her how devastated he felt, and how terrifying the thought of having to re-learn how to do even simple things for himself was, but he couldn't. He felt for the side table and sat his coffee on it.

"Julia," he began, "have you ever had a patient with an injury like mine recover their eyesight?" She paused for a long time before answering.

"No," she said somberly.

"As I feared," he replied.

"That doesn't mean you won't," she corrected. Ignis leaned back against the pillows and ran his fingers through his messy hair. He had no intention of letting hopelessness defeat him, but he also saw no value in false hope.

"When will I be discharged?" he asked.

"In a couple of hours. The doctor and I will go over your treatment plan with you," she explained. _Treatment plan._ He smirked a little at the thought of it. What could they do to help him? The only thing he had hoped they could save was lost. Julia sensed a bitterness in him that wasn't there before. It was very disheartening.

"Would you like me to help you get dressed?" She finally asked, trying to think of something that might get him on his feet.

"I do know how to dress myself," he responded sharply.

"Of course, I didn't mean to insult you," she replied apologetically. The tone, more than the words, had hurt her. Ignis regretted it.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you," he said sincerely.

"It's alright, I understand. I'll let you rest now," she answered and left the room. Ignis felt a little guilty for hurting her feelings, but he was becoming defensive about his condition. He was determined to take care of himself. He sat up and forced himself to eat.

* * *

Ignis got dressed a little more slowly than he normally would have, but it wasn't difficult. He knew exactly how his familiar suit would look. Attending to his hair, however, was a little challenging. He decided not to attempt his usual style and just combed his long bangs back from his face. He sat on the edge of his bed and leaned on his cane. It wasn't long before his doctor returned to discuss his "treatment plan".

The doctor went through the diagnosis again, standard procedure, but Ignis wasn't listening. None of that mattered anymore. Next were the medications.

"I've put you on a reduced dose of the pain killer. I'm tapering you off over the next two weeks. By then you should find the pain manageable without medication," the doctor explained. Ignis didn't intend to take it, so he wasn't concerned about the details of the tapering schedule. There was also a prescription for a burn cream that he was supposed to apply twice a day. The last medication caught his attention.

"I'm going to put you on a mild anti-anxiety drug," the doctor said matter of factly.

"I beg your pardon?" Ignis said. He hadn't remembered going through a psychiatric evaluation.

"It's a common practice with patients who have suffered similar injuries," he explained.

"That won't be necessary," Ignis insisted, "I can manage the stress on my own." He had no intention of going on even more medication.

"It's a limited dose,' the doctor said, "it will help you adjust."

"I can adjust perfectly well on my own," Ignis answered.

"I'm sure that is true. You do not have to take this, but I'd recommend you do," the doctor argued. Ignis didn't say anything else, but privately decided not to take it. He was feeling a little overwhelmed-who wouldn't? But he didn't think he needed a pharmaceutical intervention-at least not yet.

"I'll write up detailed instructions for all of these things. I'll have Julia record a message for you as well," the doctor said.

"Thank you," Ignis tried to be courteous, but he found himself increasingly irritated by his doctor.

"It's been an honor to treat you. I know I speak for the people of Accordo when I thank you for your service," the doctor said earnestly.

"I was happy to do it," Ignis responded. He was touched by the doctor's words but he couldn't feel very enthusiastic about his role in the battle. Lady Lunafreya had perished and he had lost his sight. He didn't feel victorious.

Julia returned shortly with all of the medications neatly divided and placed in a bag. She had used embossed labels for each to help Ignis distinguish between them. He didn't tell her that he didn't plan to take any of them.

"You are stubborn, but I'm going to miss you," she said, perhaps sensing his thoughts. Ignis stood up and gripped the cane in his right hand. Julia was impressed at how handsome he looked in his suit.

"You have taken exceptionally good care of me," he replied, "and I apologize for being so stubborn."

"You are definitely not the worst," she answered, "now would you mind if I hugged you?" She asked. She didn't want to startle him with a sudden embrace.

"Not at all," he replied. Julia wrapped her arms around him. Ignis wasn't much for such displays of affection, but sometimes it was comforting to be held. After a few moments, she pulled away.

"Prompto is waiting for you out in the lobby, I'll take you to him," she said as she took hold of his left forearm. She was more emotional than she expected to be. She felt like she had failed Ignis. He didn't have his sight back and she was sending him back out into the world before she felt he was ready.

They walked in silence to the lobby. Ignis hung his head a little. He could feel the stares of people as they passed. He didn't want to be pitied by anyone-including himself. He had decided late the night before to focus all of his energy into preparing for the rest of their journey. He knew he wouldn't be able to fight like he had before the injury, that was a given, but he could at least learn to take care of himself.

"Ready to go?" Prompto said as he saw his friend enter the lobby. Julia let go of Ignis' arm and let him walk the rest of the way towards Prompto.

"Ignis, wait," she said, "I want to give you my number." Ignis took his phone from his pocket and typed in the passcode. That was one thing he could do with his eyes closed. He offered it to Julia and she added her name to his contacts.

"Well at least one of us got a girl's number on this trip," Prompto joked. Julia just smiled and handed the phone back to Ignis.

"Call me if you ever need me, I'll be there," she said.

"Thank you," he responded and began to walk with Prompto towards the exit. Prompto let Ignis find his own way for the most part, but gently redirected him if he was getting off course. In the few times they'd been out walking, he learned that Ignis didn't like much interference.

Gladio was waiting for them in the courtyard outside of the hospital. The sun was shining brightly on the many patients relaxing in the garden. The atmosphere was almost a happy one.

"Happy to be out of that prison?" Gladio asked. He had no fondness for hospitals.

"Yes, but I do wonder where we will be staying now," Ignis sensibly observed.

"Don't worry about that-the first secretary got us each rooms in the Leville. They are the nicest rooms I've ever stayed in. It's bigger than my house back in Insomnia," Prompto happily replied.

"Oh, speaking of the first secretary," Gladio added, "she wants to meet with you tomorrow morning. Apparently she has some special gift for you."

"Interesting," Ignis replied. He wasn't all that enthused about meeting with a head of state in his condition.

"We should take you to your room now and let you get settled in," Gladio suggested. Ignis agreed and the three started walking towards one of the gondola stations. He couldn't see just how devastated the city was. The battle with Leviathan had done tremendous damage. Toppled statues and broken columns were everywhere. Nevertheless, many shops remained open and people attempted to go about their ordinary lives.

"Do they have any idea when your eyesight will get better, Iggy?" Prompto asked, not knowing how painful the question would be. Ignis hesitated before replying. Gladio observed him closely as he made his reply.

"No, I'm afraid not. It could be a very long time," Ignis didn't consider it a lie. There was still a remote chance some vision would be restored. An _extremely_ remote chance. Gladio was not really convinced by the answer.

"That sucks," Gladio commented. Seeing Ignis looking so lethargic and weak despite a week of hospital care had all but convinced Gladio that his friend needed to go back to Caem. Ignis could already tell that Gladio would be the biggest obstacle he had to face before continuing the journey.

* * *

_The Leville_

Gladio spoke to the receptionist at the desk before they escorted Ignis upstairs. He tried to imagine the lobby, but it was very hard to construct a mental picture of a place based on sound and touch alone. He needed to get much better at it if he hoped to adjust to his condition. For now, however, he could rely on Prompto to guide him.

"We're not all on the same floor, unfortunately," Gladio explained as they headed for the stairs, "but you're on the same floor as Noct."

"Good, I would like to visit him now, if I could," Ignis responded. He placed a hand on the railing and took his time with the first few steps. Once he gauged the distance between them, he was able to move at a nearly normal pace.

Noctis was in room 115. Ignis felt the embossed numbers on the door before they entered. He wanted to be able to find his way back again. Gladio opened the door and they filed in. It was a spacious and beautiful room, like all of the rooms in the Leville. Noctis was sleeping peacefully in the large, comfortable bed. An Accordo soldier stood guard near the door. The first secretary had offered the protection and Gladio had wisely accepted it. Between the guards, Gladio, and Prompto, there was always someone watching over Noctis.

Prompto helped Ignis over to Noct's bedside. Ignis took the prince's wrist and felt for his pulse. He needed to know for himself that Noctis was alive. The pulse was strong and steady. Ignis breathed a sigh of relief.

"I'm here now, Noctis," Ignis said so quietly it was barely audible. Ignis turned to Gladio.

"Does he know about Lady Lunafreya?" Ignis asked.

"I don't think so," Gladio replied. Ignis dreaded having to tell him. He felt like he had failed Noctis and Luna. He should have been able to stop the chancellor. Instead, he had allowed him to escape. He knew it wasn't a fair way to look at the events, but he still felt responsible. Gladio could see that Ignis was becoming more distressed.

"Prompto, take him to his room, I'll stay here with Noct for a while," Gladio commanded. Prompto nodded and gently gripped Ignis' forearm. Ignis wanted to stay by Noctis' side, but he was surprised at how fatigued he had become just from the relatively limited amount of walking they had done. _I would never be able to hike up Ravatogh like this…._

Ignis' room, 112, was just down the hall. He felt the key and the numbers on the door to commit it to memory. He opened the door himself and went inside. It wasn't as big as Noct's room, but it was plush nonetheless.

"Yours has a better view than mine," Prompto unthinkingly commented.

"Apparently the first secretary has a sense of humor," Ignis sarcastically observed.

"Sorry buddy I didn't mean to-

"Think nothing of it," Ignis interrupted him. He didn't want to make Prompto feel guilty. It would take time for them all to get used to his new condition. Ignis moved slowly and with the help of the cane was able to find the dresser. He let his hand glide across the entire surface. Usually hotel rooms placed the bed near the dresser. He carefully searched in front of the dresser and found the edge of a bedpost. He tentatively reached out with his hand and felt a soft bedspread. He walked along it until he found the nightstand. He leaned the cane against it and sat on the edge of the bed.

Prompto watched him the whole time. He personally thought Ignis was doing much better at finding his way around, but it was painful to see his capable friend struggling to navigate in a relatively small room. _How could he survive in a battle?_

Ignis slipped off his jacket and carefully laid it on the bed. He took off his shoes and leaned back against the pillows. The burn wound was very sore and sensitive, but it was his mind-deadening headache that was giving him the most trouble. He tried to ignore it, but it was nauseatingly painful. His precariously placed jacket slipped onto the floor when he moved.

Prompto walked over and picked it up. As he draped it over the armchair in front of the bed, a small bag of medicine fell out of the pocket. Prompto picked up the bag and took it over to the dresser.

"I'll put your meds over here on the dresser, Iggy," he said. He took the note from the bag and read the schedule and started to take the bottles out.

"This says you are due for a painkiller at 5—it's 5:15, do you want one?" Prompto asked as he set the small bottle on the dresser. Ignis shook his head.

"I'm fine for now," he replied. Prompto thought he looked like he needed one, but he didn't try to argue. He pulled out the burn cream and sat it next to the pain killer. Finally, Prompto pulled out the anti-anxiety drug. He recognized it.

"Are you taking this stuff? I've had it before," he revealed.

"You'll have to tell me what *this* is," Ignis replied.

"The anti-anxiety one," Prompto answered.

"Oh, that. I'm not taking that. I don't need it," Ignis said it somewhat curtly. He sounded more defensive than he had intended. Prompto went silent for a few moments.

"There's no shame in taking it, Iggy," he said finally.

"I don't think there is shame in it Prompto, I just don't think I need it," Ignis replied. Prompto gave up the argument and finished organizing the medicine. Ignis decided he should say something.

"Why did you take it?" Ignis asked. He was curious, but also wanted to show that he actually cared.

"During school I was kind of a chubby kid and I got bullied a lot," Prompto confessed, "it got to the point where I was too stressed out to go to school some days." Prompto didn't go into the details, but he had experienced more than just teasing. He'd been on the receiving end of cyberbullying and much more.

"Children can be extremely cruel," Ignis observed.

"Yeah…eventually my mom took me to a counsellor and they put me on this stuff—it helped a little," he said.

"Did things get better for you at school?" Ignis inquired.

"One day I just decided I was going to take over my life and become the kind of person I wanted to be—I didn't let them affect me anymore," Prompto said. He was proud of how he'd survived it.

"And here you are now. You overcame it on your own, Prompto. Good for you," Ignis said. Prompto couldn't really recall a time Ignis had actually praised or complimented him. It felt good. Ignis reflexively put his arm over his eyes again. It was clearly an effort for him to keep conversing. Prompto decided to let him rest.

"I'm going to go grab some dinner—I'll bring something back for you later," he said, "if you need anything just give me a call on your cell, OK?"

"I will do that," Ignis replied. Prompto quietly slipped out of the room.

" _Become the kind of person I wanted to be,"_ Ignis repeated in his thoughts. Prompto's struggle had been a much different one than his own would be, but it inspired him a little nonetheless. Ignis was determined not to let his blindness dictate what kind of life he would lead.

He pulled his phone from his pocket and turned on another audiobook. He tried to concentrate on the words instead of his aching head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to make inferences about where Noctis was sleeping during chapter 9, but I'm assuming it was the Leville or some kind of governmental residence. I'm going with the Leville in this story, but it definitely could have been another location. In the next chapter, Ignis and Prompto are going out on the town. As always, thanks for reading and commenting!


	9. Chapter 9

Early the next morning, Ignis, Prompto and Gladio went to first secretary Camelia Claustra's office. There were a small number of officials gathered there, but the atmosphere was quite sedate. After some standard pleasantries, the first secretary went on to present her gift. She picked up an ornately decorated cane and walked in front of her desk.

"On behalf of the people of Accordo," first secretary Claustra said, "I want to thank you for your valiant service during the evacuation of Altissia. Thousands of lives were saved because of your efforts."

Ignis stood still in front of her as she spoke. He bowed his head slightly in acknowledgement of her praise.

"I would like to present you with this small token of our appreciation," she held the cane out towards him as she said it. She went quiet and Ignis suddenly felt naked. He couldn't see the gift she was offering and didn't know how he should accept it. The first secretary, of course, was inadvertently making it all more difficult for Ignis. Realizing her mistake, she placed the handle of the cane in Ignis' right hand.

"Thank you," he replied. He felt the ornate handle in the palm of his hand. It was obviously something of value, but he couldn't help but feel disappointed in the experience. He'd expected perhaps some sort of military medal.

"I will provide support and protection to King Noctis and the Crownsguard for as long as you need to remain in Altissia," she said to all three men. They thanked her and made their way back out into the city.

* * *

"Well, that was a giant waste of time," Gladio remarked.

"I appreciated the gesture," Ignis replied, even though he too was disappointed.

"If they wanted to honor you, they could have done better," Gladio said. He had a negative attitude towards everything in the city now. Anger was often his response to stress. Every time he looked at Ignis or thought about his condition, Gladio felt completely demoralized. Instead of wallowing in that feeling, he opted for anger.

"I think they're trying their best," Prompto added, trying to ease the tension.

"If they did their best, Ignis wouldn't be blind," Gladio replied. He immediately regretted it when he looked at his friend's reaction. Ignis felt like he'd been slapped in the face. It was the first time one of them had called him "blind". It was a perfectly accurate description, but that didn't make it less painful to hear.

"I'm sorry," Gladio said.

"It's alright," Ignis replied softly. Prompto didn't know what to say. He tried to change the subject.

"Want to go get some gelato?" Both Gladio and Ignis turned towards Prompto with incredulous looks on their faces.

"You guys go without me-I'll check on Noctis," Gladio said and started to walk away, "but be back by 2—I've got a meeting to attend."

Ignis was determined to get in some walking practice, so he agreed to the ice cream quest. They were in a bit of a crowd just outside the first secretary's office, so Prompto decided to take Ignis by the arm.

"Thank you, but I can manage," he said and gently freed himself. He used his new and improved cane to find his way to the staircase in front of the government building but he misjudged the first step and nearly fell. Luckily, Prompto grabbed the tail of his jacket just in time and hauled him back to the top of the step.

"Thank you," he said.

"No problem," Prompto said as he took hold of Ignis' arm again. Ignis accepted the help this time and the two made their way down the steps. Once they were on level ground again, Prompto let go. Ignis moved slowly, but steadily and in a mostly straight line. The smooth cobblestone paths made a distinctive sound when it came into contact with his cane and it helped him find his way a little more effectively. Prompto watched him closely—for the most part.

Ignis began to feel something akin to hope as they strolled leisurely along the canal road. Hearing Prompto's chatter, street music, the voices of people and the gentle lapping of the water against the sides of the canal, made him realize there was still much to experience in life even without sight. In time, he would get accustomed to his condition, he was sure of it, but he didn't have much time. Noctis could wake up at any moment.

Ignis was too lost in thought to realize how far off course he'd gotten and by the time Prompto noticed, Ignis had nearly walked right into a canal. A helpful gondolier grabbed Ignis by the shoulders and steadied him. It was incredibly embarrassing.

"My apologies," Ignis said.

"Glad to be of help, sir," the gondolier replied. Prompto rushed up to his side and took his arm again, carefully guiding him back to the main path. Ignis continued to walk on his own, but his shoulders were a little slumped and he held his head a little lower. Prompto could tell that he was feeling discouraged. It was difficult to watch. After a distracted jogger bumped into Ignis, Prompto decided hold on to him.

"If you don't let go," Ignis said, "people will think we're on a date." He smirked when he said it-he knew it was the sort of thing that would drive Prompto nuts.

"Oh, come on. Don't be like that," Prompto replied, but he did let go.

Prompto was looking for a specific shop they had stopped at when they first arrived in town, but the city was difficult to navigate and many areas were roped off due to structural damage. When they hit another dead end (and a fishing spot, he made a mental note to tell Noctis) it became clear they were lost.

"Ok, so I may have taken a wrong turn-or two," Prompto said.

"The blind leading the blind," Ignis quipped.

"That joke was a Pyrrhic victory, bud," Prompto replied.

"I believe the shop you are looking for is near the Leville which means we should find a gondola and ask for the Leville station," Ignis rationally explained.

"Oh, yeah, oops," Prompto felt a bit stupid about the situation, but who hasn't gotten lost in Altissia? The two headed for the nearest gondola.

Thanks to Ignis' good thinking, it wasn't long before the two found the gelato shop Prompto loved. Ignis was feeling very tired, but generally happy with his progress for the day, so he was determined to enjoy the break. They sat down at a small table with a cheerful umbrella. The waitress took their order and brought them some fresh gelato. Prompto ordered chocolate and Ignis ordered the coffee flavored variety-it was as close as he was going to get to Ebony for a while.

It was surreal to be enjoying a tasty dessert in the middle of all the wreckage. One of the most ominous reminders of the destruction were the giant, toppled angel statues. Prompto couldn't stand to look at them, but none of that really affected Ignis. His perceptual experience was confined to the non-visual senses and they were telling him a different story. He could feel the warmth of the sun (warm enough to take off his jacket), taste the perfect gelato and hear the idle chattering of the people around them. The Altissians were already trying to return to their lives and hard at work cleaning up the mess. It sounded much more normal than it looked.

Just as the two finished up their gelato, an unexpected visitor arrived. A tiny dog barreled towards them and hopped up onto Ignis' lap. Ignis was startled at first by the unexpected guest, but when it curled up against him and put its head on his bare forearm, he couldn't help but smile. He pet its soft fur, and almost instantly felt more at peace.

"That is an adorable little doggo," Prompto said. He couldn't resist any chance to pet an animal. He scratched its soft, fluffy head, but it stayed glued to Ignis. _Maybe it knows he's hurting,_ Prompto thought. By that point, even Prompto knew they were running late, but neither of them wanted to disturb the dog. They were also having the most enjoyable afternoon they'd had in a very long time.

"What's your name, little one?" Ignis said to the dog. Prompto checked for a collar, but there wasn't an ID tag.

"Maybe we should keep it," Prompto suggested. Ignis smiled at the thought of it. A tiny dog traveling the globe with them? Going to Tenebrae? It was insane.

"We could even train her to be a guide dog for you," Prompto enthused, "that would be really cool." Ignis didn't tell Prompto that guide dogs came from much larger breeds and that it took years of intense training.

"I don't think it would be a good idea to bring an animal on our journey," Ignis observed. The idea of finding special accommodations for pets was a bit amusing, though.

"Yeah and I guess you won't need a guide dog for that long," Prompto said. He was operating under the assumption that Ignis would have some of his eyesight restored. Ignis couldn't tell him what his real prognosis was. Not yet. Beyond that, he wasn't ready to completely give up hope himself.

They were so engrossed in petting the little dog that neither of them noticed a young woman approach. She was an attractive twenty something with shoulder length blonde hair and she was wearing a delicate pink sundress.

"I'm so sorry about that," she said referring to her dog, "she likes to run off sometimes." She smiled when she saw how happy her dog was in the young man's arms.

"Oh, it's quite alright-we've enjoyed her company," Ignis replied.  She liked the sound of his voice.

"She certainly seems to like you," the young woman blushed a little when she said it. She found this young man to be very attractive. Prompto noticed her reaction and felt a twinge of jealousy, but decided to be a good wingman instead.

"Do you want to join us for a bit?" Prompto asked. He wanted to give Ignis a chance to chat with this girl.

"Oh I couldn't possibly." she answered, "I have to get to work, but maybe I'll run into you some other time." She was only looking at Ignis when she said it. She went to collect her small dog from Ignis' arms and he was a little startled when she did it. She hadn't noticed his injury thanks to the sunglasses and bright afternoon sun. After his startled response and his misdirected gaze, she realized that he must have a vision issue. She was apologetic.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you like that," there was sympathy in her voice.

"No need to apologize," Ignis responded, "it was nice to meet you."

"It was nice to meet you...both of you," she politely remembered Prompto was there. There was a look of sadness on her face, but she had an instinct that saying something sympathetic about his injury would be a bad idea. She reattached the leash to the dog's collar and walked away.

Ignis felt a little embarrassed about how the encounter ended. The sound of pity in her voice bothered him. Previously, he might have chatted with her, or flirted with her, but the thought of a woman offering her company as some sort of consolation gave him pause. He hadn't even considered that dimension of his injury. He hadn't had time. Romance? Would he ever feel as confident as he had once been?

Prompto noticed Ignis' more somber demeanor, and guessed what he must have been thinking about.

"That girl was reallllly into you," Prompto observed as he dropped a tip on the table.

"You think so?" Ignis was half-heartedly playing along.

"Definitely," Prompto replied as the two of them stood up from the table.

"Perhaps, but I doubt she would be interested in me….at the moment," he didn't  say _"because I'm a disfigured blind man"_ but the thought crossed his mind. Prompto still got the picture.

"Look man, all I can see is she was blushing and staring at you and she didn't even look at me," he answered. Ignis smiled; he knew Prompto was trying to boost his ego, but it still felt good to hear it.

* * *

It was late afternoon when Ignis and Prompto finally returned to the Leville. They were headed for Noct's room but found Gladio waiting in the hall.

"Where the hell have you two been?" Gladio seethed.

"Sorry big guy, we got a little lost," Prompto was apologetic. Ignis wasn't used to getting scolded and it ruffled his feathers a bit.

"My apologies, we lost track of the time," Ignis said, trying to calm Gladio's temper.

"Next time, try to be a little more punctual," Gladio said, "someone needs to be here with Noct and I've got a meeting with the first secretary." That stung Ignis' pride. It was his role to be the captain of the team; it was his job to make plans. He tried to smother the fire of indignation growing his heart.

"I'll stay with Noct," Ignis said calmly. Gladio hesitated, but decided it was a safe enough job for him to do. He just had to sit there after all.

"Alright-Prompto go find us some food," Gladio commanded. Prompto shrugged his shoulders. He didn't like to be in charge of procuring food; he'd rather just eat it.

"You can brief me about your meeting with the first secretary later," Ignis said, subtly making sure that his role wasn't completely usurped.

"Yeah, sure. I'll do that," Gladio replied.

Prompto offered to help Ignis to Noct's room but he declined and found his way on his own. Tomorrow, he would have to prove himself to Gladio and there was only one way to do that-sparring.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alert: did you guys see the Episode Ignis trailer at the end of Episode Prompto yet? I won't spoil it for you here, but my feels! If you have thoughts, please post in the comments (or send direct message if you prefer). I think some of it lines up quite well with the first chapter of this story, but I have so many thoughts!
> 
> Chapter notes: The scene about the cane was inspired by a blurb in the key items. If you look at your key items, you'll notice Ignis' Accordo cane.


	10. Chapter 10

"OK, Iggy, let's see what you can do," Gladio said as he finished setting up a makeshift striking dummy (made from a hat rack and some towels). The two were using the Leville exercise room as a training room. It was ill suited to the purpose, but it was the best they could do on short notice.

"What do you want me to do?" Ignis asked.

"I want you to hit this target," Gladio said as he loudly patted the dummy-trying to help Ignis direct his aim with the sound. Gladio stepped away, giving the dummy a wide berth. He didn't want a stray dagger going his way.

Ignis felt extremely nervous. He hadn't felt quite like it since he was just a teenager facing Cor Leonis. He called his daggers to his hands; their familiar weight was a comfort. He tried to clear his mind and visualize the dimensions of the small room and guess from there where the dummy might be. But it was very difficult; especially under pressure. He took a well-practiced stance for throwing and lined himself up with the target (or so he thought). He threw the first dagger. His form was perfect and the dagger flew at an incredible rate of speed, but it sank into the wall well wide of the target.

Ignis could tell by the sound he had missed the target, but he wasn't sure _where_ he had missed. He guessed correctly from the sound that he was wide left, but he was incorrect about the distance from the dummy. The second dagger he threw was closer, but this time it flew above the dummy. He started to sweat and his hands were a little shaky when he called the daggers back.

"The good news is you actually hit something," Gladio said, hoping it would lighten the mood. Ignis tried to swallow his pride and give it another shot.

Ignis got back into his stance and hurled his first dagger with a little more aggression than he had the last time. If the dagger had hit a target, it would have been deadly blow, but instead it landed on a faded Totomostro poster hanging over a weight machine. Ignis was beginning to lose his temper slightly-not an emotion he was used to. He took a deep breath and threw his second dagger. It flew dangerously close to the top of Gladio's head-close enough to make Gladio grunt and jump backward.

"If you think I need a haircut, just tell me," Gladio quipped.

"My apologies," Ignis said. He genuinely felt terrible. So far, the training session was a bit demoralizing.

"I think that's enough throwing practice. You are going to have to change your style," Gladio said.

"You are undoubtedly correct," Ignis allowed. He'd been throwing daggers with incredible precision since he was 15 years old. It was quite painful to think he might never be able to do it again. He pushed the feeling aside-he'd work through that when he had time. He dismissed the daggers.

"Want to take a break?" Gladio wanted to give him a way out without hurting his pride.

"No, we've only just begun," Ignis said.

"Alright then, let's try a little sparring," Gladio responded. He walked over to the wall where he had left two, hefty wooden broom handles; not exactly ideal sparring equipment, but surprisingly satisfactory. He walked over to Ignis and pushed the handle into Ignis' right hand.

"Is this...a broom handle?" Ignis could tell what one of those felt like even without his eyesight.

"Yeah, we're sparring-not trying to kill each other," Gladio explained, "first to ten strikes wins."

Ignis had trained with wooden swords many times in the past so he resolved to treat it like that. He didn't often fight with sabers or swords in actual combat situations, but it was helpful from a training standpoint. Ignis took a stance appropriate for saber combat (he was a bit rusty, but it was still a physical memory).

"Ready? I'm not going to go easy on you," Gladio warned.

"You needn't worry about that," Ignis exuded a confidence he didn't really feel.

Gladio swung his practice sword so quickly it made a whistling sound as it sailed through the air. Ignis was able to put his guard up at the right moment-years of practicing with Gladio gave him a sense of the other man's timing. He pushed back against the larger man and broke the lock.

"Not bad," Gladio replied as he stepped back a couple of feet, "now we're going to fight for real."

Ignis swiftly swept the "blade" in a crescent moon stroke in front of him. Gladio easily parried it with a giant, two-handed swing. Ignis just barely got his sword in front of him in time to block the hit. The force sent him backward, but he braced himself with his back foot. He knew he couldn't hold off Gladio much longer, so he dropped to the floor and rolled to his left causing Gladio to over-balance.

Ignis got back to his feet and tried to land a solid hit, but Gladio had already moved. Ignis was discovering just how much a limitation his lack of sight was. He physically remembered exactly how to fight, but he couldn't adjust quickly to his opponent. Even if he guessed where to swing correctly, the fraction of time he was slowed down would be enough to get him seriously hurt on a battlefield. Gladio pressed the point of his sword into Ignis' ribcage and backed away.

"That's one," Gladio pointed out and stepped back, allowing his friend to regroup.

Ignis pulled off his jacket and tossed it aside. He hoped shedding the extra weight might improve his dexterity. He was breathing harder than he expected to be and felt a little dizzy. _Too much time in a hospital bed…._

Gladio charged and took another huge swing, this time Ignis stumbled and the hit managed to land. Ignis was getting increasingly frustrated at the experience, but pressed on. The match didn't last much longer. Gladio hit him everywhere. Across the knuckles, the arm, the back-Ignis was leaving every target exposed. Despite the poor performance, he wanted to try again.

The second match was even more of a disaster. Ignis wasn't able to effectively block any hits and his swing speed was gradually decreasing. Gladio insisted on a break. Ignis was relieved but tried not to show it. He leaned over with his hands on his knees for a moment and caught his breath. Gladio handed him a bottle of water and offered a bit of advice.

"Every time you go on the attack, you are leaving yourself wide open," Gladio observed. Ignis couldn't disagree. Each swing he took was a guess and he had guessed wrong consistently, so far.

"Perhaps I should try a more defensive style," ever the strategist, Ignis was trying to come up with a new combat plan for himself. He took a long drink form the warm bottle of water.

"Maybe," Gladio said somewhat apathetically.

"Let's try using our real weapons," Ignis suggested. Gladio was a bit shocked after the beating he had just taken.

"Why?" Gladio asked, still in disbelief.

"On the battlefield, enemies won't be trying to strike me with broom handles," Ignis accurately observed.

"You can't be sure about that," Gladio snarked as he called his giant great-sword into his hands, "but we'll do it your way."

Ignis called his daggers back into his hands and aligned them in front of his body in a defensive position. Typically, Ignis would try to dodge attacks rather than block them, but he knew that he wasn't anywhere near ready to attempt dodging an enemy assault. Without warning, Gladio struck Ignis with a full swing of the great-sword. Ignis' biceps screamed in response to the pressure-he couldn't recall ever being hit that hard by Gladio before.

"I really tried to knock you on your ass there, you held up pretty well," Gladio was encouraged.

The true test, however, was how long Ignis could hold up against an onslaught. He swung at Ignis several times in a row, each hit successively a little stronger. Ignis' arms began to feel quite weak. He tried to change his stance and transfer some of the weight from his arms, but it was no use. The last strike was too much-Ignis' arms gave way causing the quillion of one of his daggers to be driven back into his mouth. It felt like getting punched in the face. He fell to the ground, dropping his daggers in the process. Gladio rushed to help him up.

"Are you OK?" Gladio said as he strongly gripped Ignis' right bicep and pulled him into a sitting position.

"Yes, I'm fine," Ignis said, but he could taste the metallic flavor of blood in his mouth. He couldn't tell if it was his lip bleeding or the inside of his mouth. He wasn't sure it really mattered.

"You're bleeding," Gladio observed, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have hit you so hard."

"We were sparring, these things happen," Ignis said as he wiped the blood from his mouth with the back of his hand. It did nothing to slow the trickle of blood. Gladio decided to give him a potion. The healing blue aura enveloped Ignis briefly and cleared up some of his wounds from the day, but it could do nothing for permanent or chronic injuries. Gladio sat down next to him. He was upset at himself and the entire situation. He didn't want to hurt his friend, but he needed to test his strength. He needed to know just how impaired Ignis really was.

"I think we're done for the day," Gladio said calmly.

"I think we should continue, I'll be fine in a few minutes," Ignis said, but he wasn't actually sure of it himself.

"You need to rest, you've only been out of the hospital a couple of days," Gladio had made up his mind that the training was over. Ignis knew he needed to convince Gladio he could continue on the journey and he had done a poor job of it so far.

"Perhaps," Ignis replied, "I'll study other approaches to defense in the meantime." Ignis wanted to make it clear he had no intention of giving up. Gladio seemed to ignore the comment.

"Iris asked me if she could call you," Gladio began, "she was afraid she might disturb you." Ignis' throat went dry. _Sending me to Caem already?_ He tried to appear unfazed.

"Of course she may call me whenever she likes," Ignis said a little more tersely than he'd meant to. Gladio interpreted it as a brush back, and he didn't want to push the issue further given that he'd just split his friend's lip. He let it slide.

"I'll let her know. I have no idea what she wants by the way. It might be about moogles," Gladio replied honestly. She hadn't told him what she wanted to talk to him about, but both men knew full well it had something to do with a retreat to Caem for Ignis.

Ignis slowly got to his feet. Pain shot through the base of his skull like a knife. He'd been having migraines consistently since he woke up from the coma. He was going to have a difficult night. Gladio grabbed Ignis'cane and pushed it into his friend's right hand-somewhat roughly, but not maliciously.

"You want to get some dinner with me and Prompto?" Gladio asked, still sounding a little apologetic.

"No, you two go on ahead. I am more tired than I realized. Perhaps I will join you later," Ignis offered. Gladio decided not to press him further. Cleary he wanted a little space.

"I can walk with you," Gladio said.

"I can find my way back, thank you," Ignis said it politely but there was a touch of coolness that Gladio hadn't heard in his voice before. It hurt him in a way that was hard to describe. He could already feel distance forming between himself and Ignis.

* * *

Once Ignis finally made it back to his room, it was hovering around 7:00pm. He debated whether or not he should stay up and order some room service for dinner, or just go to bed early. He had absolutely no appetite so he decided on the latter. His headache had reached an unbearable point and every muscle that he could name was aching. The potion had taken care of the more serious injuries, but he was still a mess.

He decided sleep would be difficult if he remained in so much pain, so he made the dubious choice to take some of the pain pills he'd been prescribed. He felt for the correct bottle on the dresser and shook one of the pills into his hand. He washed it down with a drink of the lukewarm bottled water and went back to the bed. He didn't bother getting undressed and instead just lost the jacket and shoes. He slipped off the sunglasses and sat them on the nightstand.

He sank back against the pillows and waited for the painkiller to give him some relief. It wasn't long before he was able to drift off, but his sleep was fitful at best. When he finally did fall into a deeper sleep, he experienced an unpleasant dream….

_Ignis sat on one of the large flat rocks along the Caem shoreline. He held his cane between his legs and leaned on it a little. The ocean spray was hitting his face and he could taste the sea salt in the air. It was one of the only things that gave him any peace in the place and he made sure to spend most of his time there._

_He could hear the low roar of thunder in the distance and knew a large storm must be coming. He didn't mind. He liked to imagine he was off in the distance with his prince and the Crownsguard-not wasting his time in Caem. "They must be halfway to Gralea by now…" he thought._

" _Ignis," Iris said as she slowly approached the rocky alcove, "I'm so glad I found you." The loud, crashing waves drowned out her voice._

" _Is there a problem?" Ignis asked._

" _There's a big storm coming, Cid says everyone needs to go inside," she explained._

" _Thank you for the warning, but I'm fine staying here," he responded. It started to drizzle and the wind was picking up enough to flatten Ignis' hair a little._

" _I get worried about you when you come down here alone," she said._

" _You needn't worry; you concern yourself too much with my well-being as it is. I'm not an invalid," Ignis said snappishly._

" _I know you're not, it's just that he tide can come in really fast and these rocks are slippery-it would be easy to get hurt," she explained._

" _I know my way around this beach," Ignis countered. The rain was getting heavier and the thunder sounded closer. There was a spectacular lightning strike bright enough for Ignis to notice. Iris gasped at the sight of it and grabbed his arm._

" _Come on, we have to go back!" She shouted and gave his arm a tug. He stood up and began to walk with her, acknowledging that the storm was a danger. She was walking too fast, though, and caused him to stumble. He fell down to one knee and cursed._

" _I'm so sorry," she said and reached down to help him. He brushed her hand way._

" _Stupid girl," he said as he got back to his feet, "just leave me be." Iris felt like she'd been slapped in the face and couldn't help the tears that started to flow._

" _Alright. If that's what you want," she replied. Ignis could hear in her voice how much he had hurt her and he was immediately apologetic._

" _I wish you wouldn't hate me. I just want to help you," she said, as she wiped away some tears. She turned and started back to the house on her own._

" _Iris, wait. I apologize, I shouldn't have spoken to you like that," he started moving forward trying to catch up, but she wouldn't answer._

" _Iris?" He called, but there was no response. The tide was coming in strong now. The waves were splashing up around his calves. The noise of the storm made it impossible for him to hear anything but the surf and thunder. He was concerned she might be in danger from the storm. He started to call for her more frantically. He was nearly running when he tripped over a large rock. He landed face down in the water and his cane flew some distance away into the surf. He reached for it, but couldn't find it. He was well and truly panicked._

_Once he was back on his feet he guessed which direction to go and guessed incorrectly. He was heading into the surf and not away from it. The giant crashing waves pushed him back to the ground. Drowning was becoming a real possibility. He feared the same may have happened to Iris._

" _Iris," he said very weakly, "I can't find my way…" But she didn't respond. She was far away and Ignis knew it wouldn't be long before the ocean claimed more than his cane._

The dream caused Ignis to wake up in shock. He was breathing hard and was covered in a cold sweat. He couldn't tell visually that he was safe in his hotel room but gradually he realized that what he had experienced wasn't real. He could feel the bedspread underneath him, hear the white noise of the A/C and smell the lilies which were daily placed on his dresser by housekeeping. It was such a relief, but the hurt in Iris' voice haunted him anyway. _Might I ever become so bitter?_

He sat up, and ran both hands through his hair. His head was hurting again-the pain killer had worn off. They usually lasted around 4-6 hours so he guessed that it must be near midnight. After he had been up for a few minutes, he felt intensely nauseated. _That painkiller. On an empty stomach. What a mistake._ He held still for a moment hoping it would pass, but it only became worse. He decided to get up and move to a more suitable location in case he needed to be sick.

He grabbed his cane and found his way to the bathroom. He flipped the light switch through force of habit and almost laughed at himself. He carefully felt for the edge of the bathtub (he didn't want to fall on tile). Once he found it he eased into a sitting position and rested his head against the fresh, soft towel draped over the edge of the tub. He breathed through his nose slowly and prayed the nausea would pass, but he knew he was going to be in for a difficult night.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's painful to watch Ignis struggle so much in combat, but when you begin the Cartanica dungeon, it becomes obvious that he is in no shape to be fighting. I think that is part of the reason Gladio is so on edge at the start of that chapter. He has seen firsthand what kind of condition Ignis is in. More angst to come—sorry!


	11. Chapter 11

Ignis had been through a couple of nasty hangovers in his life. One was entirely intentional-he wanted to know his drinking limit and he discovered it. He expected this night to play out relatively similarly: get sick a couple of times and feel generally miserable, but improve quickly.

That expectation quickly evaporated. After he'd been sick a third time with no abatement in the nausea, he became concerned dehydration was a real possibility. The ordeal had also left him feeling incredibly weak-much like he did before fainting on the battlefield. He wanted to lie down and sleep, but he knew that would be an unwise decision in his current state, so he just continued to lean against the cold, porcelain tub. It was chilly enough to make him shiver. He pulled the soft towel from behind his neck and wrapped it around his shoulders.  _What a way to spend a night in royal suite._

It was becoming obvious that he needed some help. He thought about calling Prompto, but he was convinced his blonde friend would insist upon a trip to the hospital. Ignis had  _no_ intention of ever going back. He decided on a middle ground between Prompto and the hospital-Julia. He dialed her number. She picked up after a few rings.

"Hello?" She said quite sleepily.

"I apologize for calling at this hour," he said, recalling how late it must have been.

"Ignis? What's wrong?" Julia recognized his voice right away. She wasn't surprised to be hearing from him. She was convinced he wasn't ready to be discharged in the first place.

"I'm having an unfortunate reaction to those pain pills again," Ignis said.

"Nausea? Vomiting?" Julia wasted no time getting to the symptom assessment.

"Both, I'm afraid," Ignis replied, leaving out some of the gruesome details.

"How long has this been going on?" Julia was already quickly putting on her clothes. Ignis didn't know how to answer the question. It felt like hours, but it was probably no more than one.

"One, or two hours, possibly," he replied.

"How many times have you been sick?"

"3...I think. That could change in the near future," he admitted.

"Are you by yourself?" Julia was already putting a few things in her purse.

"At the moment, yes," he answered.

"Oh, Ignis, that's not safe. Where are you?" Julia said with real concern in her voice.

"The Leville…..room 112. I don't think I locked the door," he responded, "so if I don't come when you knock, please just come in."

"I'll be right there," she said as she pulled on a coat, "stay awake."

* * *

A knock at the door roused Ignis from the half-conscious state he'd fallen into. He attempted to stand up, but when he felt just how feeble his legs were, he thought better of it and sat back down.

"Come in," he called, his voice was weak and a little hoarse. Julia opened the door and stepped inside. She was a touch awe struck by the room. It had beautiful decorating and a stunning view of the city. Even in its destroyed state, Altissia was a sight to behold. She had never been a wealthy person and could only dream of having a suite like it. She slipped off her scarf and light trench coat while she stared at the view. As her eyes scanned the room, she noticed that the bed had been barely slept in and there was a light coming from the palatial bathroom. She made her way there.

She was startled when she saw Ignis; he looked worse than the day he'd left the hospital. He was still wearing his Crownsguard suit sans jacket, but his shirt was untucked and his hair was disheveled. He was shivering slightly and had a towel haphazardly flung over his legs. His head was being uncomfortably cradled by the edge of the tub. It was painful to see a patient in such a state after having been discharged. She suppressed her heartache and knelt down beside him.

"Didn't I tell you to stay awake?" She said softly. A half smile tugged at his lips.

"I am awake, unfortunately," he replied and turned his head towards the sound of her voice. She felt his forehead; she wanted to make sure he wasn't starting with a secondary infection. He felt cool; fever was unlikely. She stood up and dampened one of the plush washcloths neatly folded on the vanity. She knelt back down and gently dabbed his face with the cloth. It didn't take her long to notice the new gash on his lip.

"What happened? That wasn't there before," she said as she very carefully touched the wound.

"A minor sparring accident," he replied nonchalantly.

"You were sparring already? You seemed like such a rational person," she observed with a hint of frustration in her voice. He was impossibly stubborn.

"It was perfectly rational. I must be ready to depart when Noctis awakes," Ignis replied, but he didn't feel the same hope and confidence he'd felt just hours before. She transferred the cloth to his hand and stood up to pour him a glass of water.

"I take it things didn't go so well?" She asked as she took a bottle of pills from her purse.

"It could have gone better," he admitted. She knelt back down by his side and grasped his left hand.

"If you can keep this down, it should start working within 15 minutes," she explained and shook one of the pills out of the bottle onto his open palm. She took the cloth from his right hand and replaced it with the glass of water. Ignis quickly swallowed the pill. Once the cool water touched his lips, he realized just how thirsty he actually was. He drank deeply of the glass until Julia pulled it away.

"You should just sip it for now," she advised. Julia sat the glass next to her. She wanted to get Ignis back to his comfortable bed, but decided it would be better to wait until the medicine took effect. She collected the soft towel from his legs and wrapped it around his shoulders. She held it in place with her own arms. Ignis relaxed into the warmth of her embrace.

"You don't have to answer this if you don't want to, but why didn't you call your friends?" Julia asked, but she had a feeling she knew the reason. Ignis breathed in deeply through his nose before responding.

"If they were to see me in this condition, they would undoubtedly insist that I return to the hospital," he explained. Julia didn't say anything; she just embraced him a little more tightly.

"...and I can't say I would blame them for thinking it," he admitted.

"They are concerned about you-they don't want you to suffer," Julia said. It was exactly how she felt too.

"It's my duty to protect and advise Noctis; I can't do that from a hospital bed," he said resolutely. Julia laughed softly; it surprised him. He didn't think anything he said was particularly amusing.

"You sound so much like my husband. Noble, brave and extremely stubborn," she explained. Ignis straightened up a little. He was feeling a little defensive.

"It's why I loved him," she began again, "but it also cost him his life."

"I'm so sorry," Ignis didn't know what else to say, "what happened to him?"

"He was a supporter of the alliance with Lucis some 30 years ago. Even after it fell apart, he decided to join the fight. The day he set off, I just knew I would never see him again." Tears were trickling down her face, but Ignis couldn't tell from her voice.

"I would never have stopped him from going," she explained, "but I think about him every day, and the life we could have had together." Julia had never remarried. There was only one man she had ever loved.

"Your husband was an honorable man; Lucis appreciates his sacrifice," it sounded like an official press release, but Ignis meant every word of it. He'd had to draft many such statements during his time working in the Citadel.

"I know you have a job to do, but life is a gift, Ignis. Please don't throw yours away," she said, unable to keep the tears out of her voice now. Ignis was a chivalrous gentleman and the sound of a woman crying always cut him to the quick.

"I have no intention of getting myself killed," he said warmly. She smiled through the tears and squeezed his left hand.  _I'm supposed to be comforting him._

"Then don't," she said in a lighter tone and wiped the tears from her eyes. She put her hands around his left arm and helped him to stand. They slowly walked back to his bedside. He stood still while she turned down the cover and sheets. He heard the soft *click* of the bedside lamp as it was flicked on.

"I'd insist on getting some more comfortable clothes for you, but I think it's best you get straight to sleep," she said finally. Ignis was too exhausted to contradict her commands and climbed back into his bed.

"I can't thank you enough," he said as she pulled the covers back over him.

"I'm happy to help," she said and took a seat near the bed. Ignis was asleep in moments. She glanced at the clock:  _2:30am._ She sighed. It was going to be a tough day at work tomorrow.

* * *

"Ignis," Julia said barely above a whisper. When he didn't respond she touched his shoulder and he began to stir.

"I'm sorry to wake you, but my shift starts in a half hour," Julia explained. Ignis sat up and pushed his long bangs out of his face.

"My apologies for keeping you up so late," he said contritely.

"It was no trouble; just promise me you will take it easy today, alright?"

"I promise." Ignis was being genuine, it just so happened his definition of "taking it easy" was different form hers. Julia leaned down and kissed the top of his head before walking out. She was being far too affectionate with this particular patient, but there was no point in pretending she didn't have an especially high regard for him. Ignis, for his part, wasn't used to being 'mothered', but he found he disliked it much less than he thought he would.

Not long after she left, there was a knock at the door followed by the far too chipper voice of Prompto. Ignis forced himself out of bed and slipped his sunglasses back on.

"Open up, Iggy. I've got something for you." Prompto kept knocking until Ignis finally opened the door. Prompto was a little taken aback when he saw his friend. Ignis had clearly slept in his clothes; his shirt was untucked and shockingly wrinkled (for Ignis anyway). He was barefoot and his hair was messily pushed back from his face. His sunglasses concealed the dark circles under his eyes.

"Wow, dude. Rough night?" Prompto was always to the point.

"Good morning to you too, Prompto," Ignis replied a little tersely. The shorter man, pushed past Ignis into the room. He produced a can of Ebony from a shopping bag.

"I brought your favorite," Prompto said as he carefully put the can into Ignis' right hand. He could recognize this product by touch alone.

"Ebony? How kind of you." Ignis was genuinely happy about the development. It was likely not the best idea to drink strong coffee after the night he just had, but he needed the caffeine. He slumped into one of the armchairs in front of the window and started to drink it. He couldn't see the delicate early morning light, but he could feel it against his skin and it lifted his spirits. Prompto sat down in the chair beside him and made a discovery.

"Did you bring a girl up here?" Prompto said with surprise and admiration as he waved a scarf he just discovered. Ignis turned to him with a quizzical, annoyed expression on his face.

"What are you talking about?"

"Unless you've taken to wearing women's scarves, then a girl must have left this here," Prompto reasoned.

"Oh. That must belong to Julia...I'll make sure to take it back to her," Ignis answered and took another drink of Ebony.

"Julia was here?" Suddenly Prompto's voice was more sedate. "Is everything OK?"

"Yes, I'm fine. She just kindly brought me some medication I needed," Ignis replied offering no details. Prompto wasn't fully satisfied with Ignis' answer but he didn't have time to pry before Gladio barged in. One look at Ignis made his heart the big man's heart sink.

"Mornin'," he said in his usual brusque way. Ignis and Prompto returned the greeting. He had wanted to check on Ignis and suggest another training session, but that was out of the question now.

"So, Iggy, want to go out for another walk?" Prompto asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yes, that sounds like an excellent idea," Ignis replied. He decided that would still qualify as 'taking it easy'—he didn't want to break his promise.

"He should stay here," Gladio said.

"I beg your pardon?" Ignis felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up. He was too tired and uncomfortable to keep his temper fully in check.

"You should rest. You don't look good," Gladio answered. He wasn't wrong about that.

"I'm fine, I just need to get cleaned up," Ignis replied as he stood up, a little shakily, from his wingback chair.

"You look like you spent the night on the bathroom floor," Gladio returned.

"I guess you can judge a book by its cover, occasionally," Ignis quipped.

"Do you think this is some kind of joke? What the hell is wrong with you?" Gladio said. He was getting much more riled than he had intended. He felt a little guilty for it, but was also convinced he was right. He could see that Ignis was unwell and needed some rest.

"Chill out, Gladio," Prompto added. He hated conflict.

"Shut up, Prompto. I'm sure as hell not going to take orders from you," Gladio said quite angrily.

"Leave him out of this, Gladio. It's between you and me," Ignis felt obligated to protect Prompto from Gladio's temper. The source of the conflict was their disagreement.

"Go ahead and let him indulge you, Ignis, but you know I'm right," Gladio said as he started for the door. It felt like the two of them were "teaming up" against him and it hurt. He slammed the door on his way out and instantly regretted it. He very nearly went back in to apologize, but decided it would only make things worse. Seeing his healthy, capable friend looking like that was draining the life from him.

Ignis and Prompto went quiet for a few moments after Gladio's exit.

"Do you still want to go for a walk?" Prompto asked.

"Later, perhaps. I need to improve my personal appearance before venturing out into public," Ignis responded. It was obvious Gladio's harsh words had upset him.

"OK, just call me when you're ready. I'll go try to calm him down, I guess," Prompto said and went to search for Gladio. Ignis sat back down in his chair and leaned forward. Part of him wanted to crawl back into bed and sleep for the rest of the day, but Ignis knew that would only make him feel more miserable. He decided to call the front desk and request their dry cleaning service. He got undressed and put on one of the luxury spa robes that came with the room.

A bell hop arrived shortly after he made the call and Ignis handed over his beloved Crownsguard suit. The sunglasses and robe combination probably convinced the young man at the door that Ignis was dealing with a bad hangover, but he was finding that he didn't care much about what people were thinking anymore.

He started the shower and waited for it to get hot. But the sound of the water hitting the porcelain had an unexpected effect on him. He experienced a vivid memory of his face being pressed against rainy cobblestones by a heartless MT. It took his breath away for a moment.  _Is everything going to be difficult now?_   He pushed the image from his mind and stepped into the shower. He let the steaming hot water pour over the back of his head and tried to envision the soft, pleasant rain of Duscae.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Medical trivia—painkillers cause mild nausea for many people, but for some patients it can actually affect the inner ear and cause dizziness/severe nausea. Everyone's brain processes them a little differently. Ignis unfortunately cannot tolerate them at all, but it will certainly keep him from getting a dependency. Expect to see Noctis soon! As always, thank you for reading and commenting/reviewing.


	12. Chapter 12

Ignis slipped on his freshly cleaned jacket and smoothed the sleeves. He didn't need to see his ensemble to know exactly what it looked like. His hair, however, was another matter. With a little effort, he was confident he got it close to his usual style. Many mornings, Ignis was barely awake when he went through his grooming routine anyway. He was certain he could approximate it-even without his sight.

Once he was satisfied that his appearance was up to his usual standards, he made for the door. The familiar ring of his phone stopped him in his tracks. If he could have seen who was calling, he may have ignored it.

"This is Ignis," he said.

"Hi, Ignis, I hope you're having a good afternoon-or is it morning? I forget the time difference over there," Iris said, her voice sounded nervous.

"Hello, Iris. I'm well," suddenly he felt quite tense. The sound of her voice brought the nightmare he'd had back to mind.

"Good, I'm glad to hear it," she sounded genuinely cheerful.

"And you?" He politely asked.

"I'm doing great. The weather is perfect here right now," she said. If he were feeling better, he might have tried to make some conversation, but he just didn't feel motivated. They fell silent for a few moments.

"Gladio told me you might be coming soon," she said gently, "I'm looking forward to seeing you." Ignis had fully expected this, but it still stung to hear her talk as though his banishment to Caem was a foregone conclusion.

"It's a possibility, but I haven't decided yet," he said as diplomatically as he could. He didn't want to seem ungrateful, but he couldn't help the bitterness he felt.

"Oh, that's OK. I just wanted to let you know that everything is ready for you if you do decide to come," she was tiptoeing around his feelings and Ignis could tell that. It bothered him quite a bit, but he kept his temper in check.  _She's a kind and generous person, why should I be angry that she wants to help?_ Ignis felt like he was becoming more temperamental-he didn't like it. He opted to remain silent.

"It would be really nice to have someone other than Cid and Talcott to talk to," she said, trying to lighten the mood.

"I'm not sure I'd prove much better company," he replied. Iris got the impression he didn't want to keep talking, so she decided to wrap up the call.

"Please give me a call and let me know what you know what some of your favorite foods are—if you are coming, that is. I'm not as good of a cook as you, but I'm not bad. You can ask Gladio," she said.

"Prompto is quite fond of your cooking," Ignis replied warmly. She laughed a little.

"Just let me know," she paused for a long time before speaking further,

"I'm really sorry about what happened, but I'm so glad you're doing OK now." She sounded like she was on the verge of tears, but she held them back.

"Thank you, Iris, we'll speak again soon," he replied; touched by her concern.

"Goodbye, Ignis," she answered and Ignis hung up the phone. He absentmindedly set it down on the dresser and headed out for a walk.

* * *

At the bottom of the staircase in the lobby, Ignis overheard two men talking. By the sound of it, they were sitting near the gondola fountain. They were speaking quietly, but he could clearly hear them. The acuity of his hearing had already improved since losing his sight. One of the men sounded a little older, the other some years younger.

"What do you think really happened to Lady Lunafreya?" The older gentleman asked.

"I heard she was killed by the Hydraean," the companion replied.

"I heard she was washed into the ocean after that giant wave."

"Do you think she could have survived it?" The younger man asked.

"I really doubt it," the older voice replied. Ignis knew in his heart that Luna was gone. He was confident that what he had experienced during his coma was a glimpse of the afterlife and Luna had made it very clear to him that she had perished in the fight. Ignis pushed the thought of Lunafreya from his mind. Even the mention of her name made him feel like a failure—despite what she had told him.

As Ignis turned to leave, he was stopped by one of the concierges.

"I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to take your dog outside. There are no pets allowed in this hotel." Ignis was about to politely explain that he did not have a dog, but he felt a distinctive muzzle nose his right hand.  _Umbra._

"This is not my pet. He is my guide dog," Ignis said without missing a beat. The concierge was suddenly every apologetic.

"I'm sorry I didn't realize-"

"It's quite alright," Ignis replied and gently rested his hand on top of Umbra's head.

"Let's go see Noctis, shall we?"

* * *

Ignis located Noct's room-touch was enough to discern the room numbers. He knocked on the door and in a few moments, one of the guards the first secretary had posted answered.

"I can take it from here," Ignis said to the guard. The guard was hesitant at first, but he knew Ignis was the king's adviser, so he acquiesced. Ignis gingerly walked into the room with Umbra prancing alongside. Once they were alone, he pet the dog's head and knelt down in front of him.

"Do you have something for, Noct?" Umbra whined a little in response. Ignis took that as a 'yes'. He felt for the notebook secured to the dog's withers and carefully untied it. For the first time, he felt the full weight of Luna's death. Ignis ran his hand over the well-worn leather cover and sighed. It was going to be quite a shock for Noctis when he learned.

"Can you take this to Noct?" Ignis asked; he knew it was a little strange to talk to a dog in complete sentences, but Umbra was not an ordinary canine. Umbra stood up and carefully took the notebook in his mouth. Ignis slowly got up, looking in the general direction of the sound of Umbra's paws. He could hear the soft sound of paws touching the bedspread, so he knew Umbra had left it beside Noctis.

In moments, Umbra was at Ignis's side, as though he had been commanded to 'heel'. He nuzzled Ignis' hand. Ignis smiled and scratched his fuzzy ears. Knowing Noctis' room couldn't be too much different than his own, he was able to find his way to a comfortable armchair in front of a bank of windows. He sat down and leaned back. The warmth of the sun was soothing. Umbra rested his head on Ignis' knee. It was rare for Umbra to remain behind after dropping off the notebook, but he didn't have a mistress to return to. Ignis reached out and gently stroked the dog's fur.

"You will heal in time," he said in a soft, low voice, "we all will." Umbra whimpered lightly in response. Ignis let his hand rest on Umbra's warm, soft head. He hadn't felt so peaceful since he had been lying in the field of sylleblossoms. When Umbra lifted his head, Ignis felt a little bereft and he realized it was the dog who had been comforting him.

"You must go?" Umbra offered a soft "woof" in response. To an onlooker, the exchange would appear quite odd.

"That's a shame," Ignis said as he leaned forward and held out his hand, "until we meet again." Umbra placed a paw in Ignis' outstretched hand. It was a trick Umbra had done since Ignis and Noctis were young boys; it always amused them both. The dog trotted out the slightly ajar door and left Ignis alone with Noct.

Ignis leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, and hung his head a little. Waiting for Noctis to heal was an occupation he had taken on once before. When Noctis was 8, he had been seriously wounded in a daemon attack outside of the city. Ignis was around 10 at the time. He feared that Noctis wouldn't survive the injury, and was overjoyed when he managed to pull through. But he noticed a marked change in Noctis after the incident. He became more taciturn and introverted. Ignis had done everything he could to cheer up Noct in those days. He was sometimes moderately successful. He had no idea how he might lift the prince's spirits now.

So despite the fact that he truly wanted Noctis to awaken more than anything else, he also dreaded the moment. He would have to inform him about the death of his betrothed. It would also mean their small group would have to prepare to leave and he knew  _that_  meant a confrontation with Gladio. He was lost in thought when he heard the sound of covers rustling behind him.  _Noctis?_ He waited until he was certain, before he spoke.

"Back with us?" He ventured, turning his head slightly towards the source of the sound. There was no reply, but he could hear his friend breathing. Ignis carefully felt for the arm of the chair as he stood. He was quite happy Noctis had awoken, but he also knew he needed to be restrained. Noctis would be as disoriented as he had been when he woke from his coma. He endeavored to conceal his wound as much as he could, only half turning towards Noctis. He suspected the sight of it would be alarming.

"I'll tell the others...though it may take a bit," he said. Noctis looked up, more fully awake now.

"You're hurt," he said, the concern plain in his voice. He hated to upset Noctis under the current conditions, but it nevertheless warmed his heart to hear that concern.

"A small sacrifice, in the greater battle," Ignis replied. He had a real gift for understatement.

"And Luna?" Noctis tentatively asked. It was the question Ignis was dreading. One he was hoping to avoid until later. Ignis turned his back to Noctis, preparing to leave the room. He knew it would be the only way to conceal his own emotion.

"She has passed," he said gravely. Part of him wanted to go to Noctis, to console him, but Ignis knew that what Noct needed was privacy. He needed the opportunity to mourn without an audience. Noctis was doing his best to control his tears, but Ignis heard a stifled sob. It tore at him to hear it. Before he left the room, he gestured towards the bedside.

"Umbra left that for you," he said and quietly left the room.

* * *

Gladio stood in front of the large bank of windows in Ignis' room. He really did have the best view of any of them. It only made Gladio hate Altissia and the first secretary more. It felt like some sort of joke. Prompto leaned over the back of one of the armchairs; his arms lazily dangling in front of him. He was clearly in a somber mood.

"He's doing better at finding his way around," Prompto suggested. Gladio just sighed in response. They'd been going back and forth like this for a while.

"You didn't spar with him. He's a mess. I don't think he could hold his own in a fight with a Voretooth right now." They were harsh words, but not entirely inaccurate. Gladio still felt guilty for hurting Ignis during their training, but it was fear he felt most of all. An iron giant wouldn't have stopped to give him a potion. The sight of Ignis lying face down in a pool of his own blood haunted Gladio and he didn't want to see something like it again.

"He'll be OK soon. You gotta give him a break," Prompto said, but even he wasn't sure anymore.

"He's never going to ' _be OK_ ', Prompto. Get it through your head," Gladio snarled. It gave him no pleasure to say it, but he was convinced Ignis' sight would have returned by now if it was ever going to return.

"Don't say that," Prompto replied with more resolve in his voice than Gladio was used to hearing. Gladio was about to reply when he heard footsteps behind them. He quickly turned and saw Ignis. The strategist looked a little stunned.  _How long has he been there?_

"Iggy, hey, we were just looking for you," Prompto said, hoping that Ignis hadn't heard any of the previous conversation. Ignis had left his phone in the room after the call with Iris and he had returned to get it. He hadn't expected to find his friends there.

"That's a coincidence. I was just looking for you," Ignis tried to say it with his usual lightness, but it wasn't in his voice. He paused before sharing his news.

"Noctis is awake." Prompto smiled broadly and excitedly headed for the door. He was incredulous when his companions didn't follow.

"Come on, guys, let's go see Noct," he said, gesturing for them to join.

"Give him a few moments, Prompto," Ignis said, recalling Noctis' emotional condition when he left the room.

"Sure of, course. I'll wait outside," Prompto promised and headed into the hall. Ignis didn't follow. Gladio misinterpreted his inaction as a need for assistance. He went to take Ignis' arm and his friend abruptly pulled away.  _He must have heard everything then. Great._

"I can manage on my own, thank you," Ignis said as he slowly went to retrieve his phone from the dresser top.

"I'll see you down there, then," Gladio said. Ignis smirked at the expression. Gladio suddenly regretted his choice of words.

"Indeed," Ignis replied and slipped the phone back in his pocket. Gladio didn't know what to say, so he just left the room. They could both feel their friendship cracking under the weight of the adversity they faced. It wouldn't take much more to fracture it completely.  _One more thing to mourn,_ Ignis thought and gradually made his way back towards Noctis' room.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wish Umbra could have stayed with Ignis after he was injured. It would have been so helpful to him. It's going to get even angstier! As always, thank you for reading and commenting.


	13. Chapter 13

Noctis had been awake for a full day, but had barely left his room. He was in a deep state of grief over the death of Luna and was still experiencing the effects of exhaustion. He'd briefly met with his loyal Crownsguard, but he couldn't even muster the energy or desire to speak with them. He felt numb. His friends decided to give him some time-pat least for a day or two. Decisions had to be made, however. Towards that end, Gladio called for a conference in his room; Prompto had gone off to find them some dinner.

Ignis sat in one of the armchairs-still feeling quite tired and weak from his ordeal. Gladio stood staring out a window, grimacing at a city he had come to hate. It was only 5 o'clock and the sun was already retreating behind the horizon. That did not bode well. The darkness was descending and with the Oracle deceased, there was no telling how quickly the Starscourge would spread. They decided that the only option left for them was to retrieve the Crystal from imperial hands. That meant a suicide mission into Gralea. Not something any of them were looking forward to. After a pause, Ignis spoke.

"I'll make some travel arrangements," Ignis said as he collected his cane from beside the chair and rose to his feet. He planned to go speak with the first secretary, but admittedly, he had no idea how he was going to locate her office.

"Don't worry about it, I've already taken care of it," Gladio said. Ignis felt his hackles rise but he kept his temper in check. That was  _his_ job.

"When do we set off?" Ignis ventured.

" _We_ set off in a couple of days... _you_ set off tomorrow," Gladio said authoritatively.

"What do you mean?' Ignis asked, but he knew exactly what Gladio meant.

"Cid is going to take you back to Caem, so you can recover. When you heal up, you can rejoin us," Gladio said as calmly as he could. It was a like a nightmare come to life for Ignis. He'd been dreading this moment, but couldn't believe it was actually happening.

"That's out of the question," Ignis said firmly.

"It's decided," Gladio replied.

"You do not have the authority," Ignis countered.

"Ignis," Gladio began trying to reason with his friend, "you know as well as I do you can't make this trip in your condition."

"I'm much improved," Ignis answered. Gladio took a deep breath.  _Dammit, Ignis. Don't make me do this._

"You're kidding, right?" Gladio shot back and walked towards his stubborn friend. When he was right in front of Ignis, their height difference was more apparent.

"I can assure I am not," Ignis replied, his voice cold and aloof the way it sounded when he spoke to total strangers and adversaires. He tried to make eye contact, but in reality he was looking right past Gladio's face. Gladio sighed deeply.

"Let's review the facts. You can't fight. We've established that pretty clearly," Gladio said.

"I can defend myself," Ignis replied, but the gash on his lip told a different story.

"Barely." Gladio winced when he saw the look of hurt on Ignis' face. His stoic friend was doing a good job of hiding his emotions, but sometimes an expression slipped through. Ignis looked towards the ground and composed himself. He'd spent nearly ten years perfecting his combat skills. It was harder for him to achieve the physical strength necessary than it had been for Gladio. He was usually completely exhausted by the time he'd get to his academic work at night. The thought of all that effort evaporating after a single battle made him feel sick.

"My usefulness goes beyond combat," Ignis responded; partly to his own thoughts. His voice was calm, but it was also devoid of its usual personality.

"You're not going to be able to cook," Gladio said, inferring what Ignis was thinking about. That was an especially painful observation and it genuinely rattled Ignis. Cooking was not just a duty of his, it was his passion. He made sure his voice was steady before he spoke.

"At the moment, no, but in time…and in any case, that particular skill won't be as relevant for the next few weeks," Ignis rationalized. He knew they'd be traveling by sea and by train. They could purchase any food they might need. Nevertheless, the thought that he might never experience the joy of cooking again gnawed at his heart.

"You really think you'll be recovered by the time we're to Tenebrae, don't you?" Gladio was incredulous.

"I think it will take several weeks to get to Tenebrae," Ignis said, implying that was quite a long time.

"You think 3 weeks will be enough?" Gladio folded his arms over his chest. Ignis did not respond.

"It's not enough. You're a mess. You aren't sleeping and you're barely eating. You and I both know it's going to take months for you to get back in the shape you were," Gladio said. Ignis knew it was true. He'd lost weight, and physical strength. He was in peak form before the injury, but it would be quite some time before he could return to it. And that was supposing he didn't suffer any setbacks in his recovery.

"My mind is as strong as it ever was," Ignis replied. To strategize, plan and advise he didn't need to have his bodily strength.

"Are you so sure about that?" Gladio countered. You could practically see the hair raise on the back of Ignis's neck.

"Quite sure," Ignis said. His voice was sharper than a coeurl fang. Gladio went silent for a moment. He was convinced Ignis could not be in peak mental form if his body was in such a condition. That was one of the chief differences between the two men. Ignis had always placed his faith in the mind, Gladio relied on the body. They were never going to agree on that point. He had to try a new tactic.

"Just ask yourself if it were me or Prompto. What would you do?" Gladio had put Ignis in the conversational equivalent of "check" in chess.

"That is a hypothetical I couldn't possibly answer," Ignis finally replied. It was definitely a dodge.

"You'd have our asses on the first boat back to Caem and you know it," Gladio shot back.

"This is different," Ignis responded; he felt like he was losing the argument. Not a feeling he was used to.

"How is that?" Gladio earnestly inquired.

"I have knowledge and expertise that it would be impossible for you to acquire in mere weeks," Ignis explained. He never thought of himself as an arrogant or proud person, but he was confident in his abilities and knew Noctis would need his guidance and advice more than ever.

"So that's it," Gladio responded, "you think you're better than us." He was trying to rile Ignis and it seemed to be working. He didn't take pleasure in it, but he could think of no other way to take Ignis off his "game" and shake his resolve.

"It's a plain fact that I have more knowledge, both academic and strategic, than either you or Prompto," Ignis replied, "I draw no conclusions about whether or not that makes me a superior asset." There was a touch of haughtiness in his voice that sparked Gladio's temper. He had been trying to rattle Ignis, but it was his own temper that was now out of control.

"You are too damn proud to stop when it's clear that you should," Gladio snarled. Something seemed to change in Ignis after he said it. His voice was steady when he spoke, but he had balled his left hand into a fist.

"Do you think it feeds my pride to stumble around in the dark? To have people look upon me with pity?" Ignis asked. He didn't wait for Gladio to reply. He wasn't looking for one.

"My reasons for continuing have nothing to do with my personal aggrandizement, that I can assure you."

"Ignis, I-" Gladio's statement was interrupted by the sound of the door opening. Prompto walked in with a bag in one arm.

"Dinner is served guys," he announced as he set the bag down on the table near the entrance. When he looked up and saw the two men in front of him, he could immediately tell things were not alright.

"Everything OK?" He asked.

"It's fine, thanks for bringing the chow," Gladio responded. Ignis took the opportunity to exit the conversation and started for the door. He and Gladio had nothing left to say to each other.

"That was very kind of you, Prompto, but I was just leaving. Perhaps I will join you later," Ignis said as he moved past.

"Where are you going?" Prompto inquired.

"Just for a walk," he answered and fumbled for the door knob. Prompto would have offered help but he could tell that Ignis was in no mood to be helped. Ignis had a strong urge to slam the door, but he mastered the impulse and walked out into the hall; gently closing the door behind him.

Prompto turned towards Gladio with a concerned expression on his face.

"Should I go after him?" Prompto asked.

"No, let him sulk."  _Ignis sulking?_ Prompto couldn't believe it.

"What happened?"

"I told him he's not coming with us," Gladio replied.

"What?! Leave him here in Altissia? We can't do that-

"Shut up, Prompto. It's not your call," Gladio said it angirly enough that Prompto backed down a little.

"I think he can handle it, I can help him," Prompto said more quietly.

"The decision has been made. I don't want to talk about it anymore. Let's just eat," Gladio replied. Guilt was beginning to gnaw at his conscience, but he was convinced he had made the right choice.

Prompto started to set out the food, but his appetite was gone. Their 'band of brothers' was falling apart and the hardest mission they would ever face was coming up.  _Please don't do anything crazy, Iggy,_ he thought to himself as he placed only two paper plates on the small coffee table.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gladio is being awfully harsh and confrontational here, but I think he would have tried anything in his repertoire to get Ignis to freely choose to stay behind. Fun fact, according to the Ultimania timeline for FFXV, Ignis started his serious Crownsgaurd training around the age of 15.


	14. Chapter 14

Even though Ignis was wearing his lighter, casual attire  _and_  the sun was setting, he still felt a little warm walking along the canal. It probably had less to do with the external temperature and more to do with his own hot temper. Ignis didn't like being angry. It was a waste of time and energy, but he couldn't help feeling the way he did. He wasn't one to harp on his own contributions, but after all of the sacrifices he'd made throughout the journey, to be denied the right to join Noctis for the final mission seemed grossly unjust—and unwise.

But he was first and foremost a rational man. He understood Gladio's concerns and he shared some of them. The thought of experiencing the kind of pain and nausea he had the past several days except while they were traveling-maybe even in the wilderness-did make him quite anxious. There would be no trained hospital nurses to help him out there and his inability to fight effectively-or cook-  _would_ put a strain on the party. And yet he was still convinced that he needed to go along. His mind kept wandering back to the vision of King Regis he'd experienced. " _You have the strength necessary. Have faith."_ were the king's words. Was it just a dream? Ignis couldn't believe that. It was too real.

Reflecting on these topics meant he wasn't concentrating on walking and that was a mistake. In order to navigate he had to be fully focused and he was anything but at the moment. By the time he'd reached the customs area at the docks, he was a little tired. Normally, he had enough energy to hike an entire day, in the desert no less. It was disheartening top say the least. He wanted to push himself and increase his stamina, but he also really just wanted to sit down and have a drink.  _Maagho's it is then…_

He had been to the floating restaurant a couple of times since they reached Altissia, but he didn't have the first idea which direction to turn. He knew he must have looked a little peculiar standing in the middle of the cobblestone street contemplating which way to go. A female voice caught his attention.

"Can I help you?" She asked warmly. Ignis couldn't quite place the voice, but it did sound familiar.

"I was actually heading to Maagho's. If you could direct me to the correct gondola station, that would be most appreciated." Ignis turned his head towards the left-he knew she was in that general vicinity.

"I just came from there, I can show you the way," she replied and without hesitation slipped her right arm through his left and started walking in the correct direction. To passersby, they looked like a couple on a stroll.

"Your voice sounds familiar; do I know you from somewhere?" Ignis ventured. The young woman laughed softly. Ignis winced a little.

"I'm sorry, that must have sounded like an awful chat up line." Ignis had a tendency to walk into those sorts of linguistic traps.

"No, it's alright. Besides, I wouldn't have minded if it was," she replied. Ignis could hear the smile in her words.  _Is she flirting with me?_

"We met at the gelato shop the other day," she finally revealed.  _The girl with the dog._

"Ah, now I recall. Do you have your little dog with you?"

"She really liked you, but no she's not with me today, I'm sorry to disappoint you!" She said with mock contrition. Ignis smirked a little in response.

"No need to apologize, I find my present company more than satisfactory." She laughed softly again. Ignis was by no means a "ladies man", but a little lighthearted, flirtatious banter was quite pleasant from time to time.

"My name is Claudia, by the way," she said.

"A pleasure to meet you, Claudia. My name is Ignis-

"Scientia," she completed his introduction.

"How did you know?" He asked, genuinely surprised.

"You've been in all the papers," she replied, a little somberly.

"I had no idea." Reflecting on it, it would make sense that he and the rest of the Crownsguard might have made their way into the media. He just hadn't had time to even consider it.

"What you did for the people of Altissia-it was so heroic," she said sincerely.

"I was happy to be of service." He didn't know how to respond to such praise. They ambled on at a pleasant pace, though he could tell she was walking more slowly for his benefit.

"We've unfortunately arrived at our destination," she reported as they came to a stop in front of an empty gondola. If Ignis was looking for a date, he'd have asked her to accompany him at this point-perhaps that's what she wanted-but he genuinely wanted to be alone.

"I suppose this is goodbye then, thank you kindly for your help," Ignis said.

"I suppose it is, but I hope it's not the last time I see you," she replied. Ignis smiled.  _This young lady certainly isn't playing hard to get._

"I'm sure we'll meet again," he answered. He held out his hand to her and she took it-expecting a handshake. It was a pleasant surprise when he gently took her hand and lightly kissed it. It was a courtesy typically reserved for more high born ladies, but Ignis wanted to show his appreciation. She blushed deeply.

"Such a gentleman," she said, trying to preserve her former light tone, but she was already halfway in love. He smiled. It was heartening to know that he could still make a young woman feel that flustered.

"Have a good evening," he said and turned towards the gondolier.

* * *

 

Noctis was lying on top of the covers with his head propped up against a mountain of pillows when Gladio and Prompto entered his room. He offered them an anemic wave as a greeting. Gladio looked angry-that was nothing new-but Prompto looked concerned.

"Hey Noct, how are you feeling?" Prompto asked.

"Never better," Noct replied sarcastically. That elicited a snarl form Gladio. After an awkward pause, Prompto spoke again.

"You haven't seen Iggy by any chance, have you?"

"No, why?" Noctis sat up a little; suddenly more interested. Ignis wasn't one to just disappear.

"He went out for a walk a while ago, but he hasn't come back," Prompto explained. It was getting near 9:00pm. Ignis left at 5:00. It was quite a long absence.

"So? Maybe he took a long walk," Noctis replied, "I'm sure he'll be back."

"I guess, but when I called he didn't pick up." Prompto had never once seen Ignis miss a call if he could help it.

"He can take care of himself, Prompto. Maybe he doesn't want to talk," Noct responded. He sounded confident, but he was starting to feel a little anxious about Ignis.

"Would you mind giving him a call?" Prompto couldn't stop thinking about all the ways Ignis could get hurt.

"Alright, if it'll get you to shut-up." Noctis pulled his phone from his pocket and quickly dialed Ignis. Normally when Noctis called his trusted adviser he usually picked up after the first 1 or 2 rings. Noctis waited for nearly a minute before he ended the call. No answer. Noct had a look of bewilderment.  _Ignis always answers when I call…._

"I'm sure he's fine," Noct announced and slid the phone back in his pocket, "I don't get why you're so worried."

"He was pretty upset when he left," Prompto said.

"Since when does Ignis get upset?" Noctis was incredulous.

"Since I told him he's not coming with us," Gladio answered.

"What the hell? Why wouldn't he be going with us?" For the first time in a few days Noctis felt something. He was getting angry.

"Damn it, Noct. Get it through your head. He's blind. He can't 'take care of himself' right now." Gladio stared directly into Noctis' eyes as he said it. He was hoping to see some flicker of concern-something that showed Noctis was still there-but the young king's icy blue eyes seemed unchanged.

"He'll recover," Noctis said blankly.

"He'll never be the same again. It's better to accept that now," Gladio answered in a somber voice.

Noctis couldn't bring himself to accept that his oldest friend, his most trusted companion, might be permanently changed. Without saying anything, Noctis jumped up from the bed and headed to the door.

"Where are you going?" Prompto asked.

"I don't want Ignis to stay up past his bedtime."

* * *

 

"Ignis," Weskham said with a smile as he noticed the young man seated at the bar, "it's good to see you."

"I'd say the same, but," he gestured towards his eyes, "it would make a liar of me." Weskham smirked in response.

"Gallows humor, I like it." He finished drying a highball glass and set it behind him. He regarded Ignis more carefully for a moment. The young strategist was a shadow of the man Weskham had met just days before. He'd lost weight and he looked very weary. The injury to his eyes wasn't fully visible behind the dark sunglasses, but Weskham could see a large and nasty wound covering Ignis' left eye and a sizable portion of his temple. It looked almost like the flesh had been seared or possibly torn from his face.

"So what can I do for you?"

"I'd like a gin and tonic, please." Ignis preferred simple, old-school cocktails.

"Straight to the spirits?" Weskham asked a little provokingly.

"Think of it as an aperitif," Ignis answered. Weskham started to prepare the drink.

"Take it from me, you don't want to mix too much gin with pain killers."

"I'm not taking any pain medication, so there is no cause for concern," Ignis answered as Weskham sat the drink in front of him. Ignis gingerly felt for the glass; he didn't want to spill it. Even having a drink had become a potential occasion for embarrassment. Once his hand closed around the chilly cylinder of glass, he took a healthy sip.

"No pain meds? Doesn't that hurt like son of a bitch?" Weskham said gesturing towards the fresh wounds.

"It's….manageable," Ignis replied and took another sip. The gin was of the finest quality and Weskham had balanced the cocktail perfectly.

"So this is a medicinal cocktail then?" Weskham inferred.

"It does take the edge off," Ignis confirmed. He held the cool glass to his aching temple for a moment. He was careful to avoid the still raw wound.

"So where are your friends?" Weskham ventured as he wiped down the bar. Ignis didn't respond directly and instead took another sip of gin.

"Sore subject?" Weskham asked.

"I needed a reprieve from their company."

"Familiarity breeds contempt--believe me I know," Weskham replied, recalling his own experience with the Crownsguard. Ignis finished his drink before responding.

"Gladio has arranged for my return to Caem," Ignis revealed.

"Clarus' boy? The tall one?" Ignis nodded.

"He insists I'm too injured to go on, and will listen to no counter-arguments," Ignis answered as clinically as he could.

"That sounds like Clarus," Weskham answered, "but you disagree?" He didn't want to say it, but he agreed. Ignis looked far too unwell to travel.

"That was a magnificent cocktail. Mind preparing another one?" Ignis asked, dodging the question entirely. He didn't feel much like debating his fitness for a second time that day. Weskham took the empty glass and frowned a little. He didn't like the direction this was heading.

"Tell you what. If you have a bowl of quillhorn soup, I'll make you another cocktail," Weskham said. Ignis bristled at the ultimatum. He was a 22 year old man. He ought to be able to have a drink if he wanted. Nevertheless, he didn't want to offend his compatriot and he  _was_  just a little bit hungry.

"I will agree to your terms," Ignis said. It only took Weskham a few moments to serve up a steaming bowl of the brothy soup. Ignis could enjoy its appetizing, savory aroma even if he couldn't appreciate its appearance. Weskham made sure to place the spoon close to his guest's right hand. Ignis carefully brought a spoonful to his lips and tasted it. It was the first time he'd enjoyed food in days. He quickly attacked the rest of the bowl.

"Awful, isn't it?" Weskham joked as Ignis polished off his soup.

"I would certainly like to know that recipe," Ignis said, forgetting for a moment his new reality. In the past, he'd have pulled out his journal and made some notes, but it seemed like a pointless exercise given his condition.

"Give me your notebook," Weskham commanded. He had seen Ignis with it the first time the Crownsguard had visited the restaurant. Ignis was flustered for a moment, but he did as he was asked. Weskham took the notebook and flipped to the first blank page he found. It genuinely pained him to think that the bright, aspiring chef in front of him would never be able to read the pages on his own again. He wrote 'Quillhorn Soup' at the top of the page and filled it in. He shut the book and handed it back.

"Thank you, that was kind," Ignis politely said.

"Think nothing of it. Now, let me get you that drink I promised." Weskham deftly whipped up another gin and tonic and set it in front of Ignis. Ignis happily accepted. Weskham was silent for a few moments as he watched Ignis disinterestedly sip his cocktail. His mind was somewhere else.

"I know what you're thinking," Weskham began suddenly, "I've been there before." Ignis perked up and looked towards his fellow chef.

"On the one hand, you're thinking: 'I was doing my duty-and I'd do it again even knowing what happens', but on the other you're still thinking, ' _Why me?'"_ Nearly 30 years before, when Regis had come to Altissia to forge an alliance, Weskham was severely wounded. He was forced to stay behind and even when he recovered, he never did leave the city. Ignis was afraid if he replied, his voice might betray the heartbreak he was feeling, so he took a deep drink instead.

"I've been there. I know what it's like. And I thought gin could fix it too," Weskham said. Ignis felt like he'd been slapped in the face.   _I'm not some common drunk._

"I can assure you, I do not intend to use alcohol as a crutch," Ignis said with a touch of hostility in his voice.  Weskham smirked at the answer.  _Neither did I._

"Temper, temper."

"I meant no offense," Ignis responded, feeling a little contrite.

"Look, I was pissed too. Angry at life, the gods--at Reggie. It took me a long time to realize, there was no dishonor in being wounded.  No dishonor in staying behind."

"I understand," Ignis said very softly, conceding the point, "but you had no choice." Ignis knew Weskham had been bedridden for months after his injury. That wasn't the case for him. He knew he could push forward, albeit with difficulty.

"I just want you to realize, that sometimes you have to take care of yourself. There are only so many sacrifices a man can be asked to make," Weskham said.

"Noctis may be expected to make the ultimate sacrifice. How can I sit idly by?" Ignis sai it with real conviction.  Weskham sighed deeply; realixzing there was no point to argue anymore.

"You know, sometimes you remind me more of Reggie than Noctis does. Don't tell him that though," Weskham said with a genuine laugh. Ignis smiled and happily returned to his drink, but his peace was soon interrupted.

"Hey Ignis-where the hell have you been?!"

"Speaking of the prince…" Weskham said and suddenly found some dishes that needed doing. Ignis turned towards the sound of the voice.

"Noct?" 

"Yeah. We need to talk."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of the guidebooks mention that Weskham was injured in Altissia 30 years ago and he stayed behind. Unfortunately they do not specify his injury. I'm assuming it had to be something very debilitating, so I'm thinking it was a spinal injury, broken limbs, or some other very serious injury that would have kept him in Altissia so long. We are getting close to departure time! As always, thanks for reading and commenting. It is much appreciated.


	15. Chapter 15

Noctis settled on one of the barstools to the left of Ignis. He rested his arms on the bar and leaned forward. He didn't want to look at Ignis' eyes, so he just stared blankly in front of him. Noctis was so absorbed in the tragedy of Luna's death, that he hadn't had much time to consider the seriousness of his adviser's wound. Ignis was always so calm and stoic, it never even occurred to the young king that his friend might be depressed and overwhelmed. But now he could see that Ignis was struggling. He was in obvious pain, both mental and physical; even though he masked it well.

"I called, but you didn't pick up," Noctis finally said. Ignis felt a pang of regret.

"I'm sorry, I must not have heard it," Ignis replied, feeling genuinely remorseful. He took his phone from his pocket and realized it was dead. He had forgotten to charge it.  _Quite careless of me._ Noctis wanted to say something consoling, and friendly, but he couldn't find the words.

"Prompto and Gladio were pretty panicked, but I was pretty sure you'd be here," Noctis said.

"I'm sorry to have caused so much distress," Ignis replied, "…it wasn't my intention."

"I get it. You needed to be alone. I know how you feel." Noctis looked over towards Ignis and took a brief look at his face. The wound stretching over Ignis' left eye still looked new. There was still a little fresh blood seeping at the edges. Noctis felt his stomach lurch. He was beginning to understand why Gladio wanted Ignis to stay behind.

"You said you wanted to talk?" Ignis reminded his ward.

"Yeah….what happened to you?" Noctis asked quite bluntly. The question was like a knife in Ignis' heart. He squeezed the tumbler of gin a little tighter before responding.

"There's not much I can remember," Ignis said, "just bits and pieces."  _Bits and pieces_. Such an innocuous phrase to describe traumatic memories that attacked him without warning.

"Was it the MTs?" Noctis asked. Suddenly Ignis could almost feel the cold cobblestones pressed up against his face with an MT roughly holding his arm behind his back. His throat felt like it was closing shut and his pulse quickened. The thought that he might be experiencing the beginning of a panic attack was a frightening proposition. He drained the rest of his gin.

"You OK?" Noctis asked.

"I'm fine," he said, but it wasn't very convincing. Ignis took deep, slow breaths and hoped it would calm his nerves. He was starting to feel a little hazy thanks to the gin. Normally two drinks wouldn't be enough to make him feel tipsy, but in his weakened state, apparently it was. He just wanted to lie down. Noctis could see that Ignis wasn't ready to talk about his own injury so he moved on to his next question.

"Just forget it for now....There's something else I wanted to know-I need to know….What happened to her?" They both knew he was referring to Luna. Ignis thought about her serene presence during his coma and the painful realization that she had perished.

"I...don't know," Ignis answered; his voice was barely above a whisper.

"I don't believe you. You have to know," Noctis said.

"I didn't see it happen, Noct. I'm sorry." Ignis turned his head towards Noctis, hoping to make some sort of eye contact.

"You were there, damn it. How can you not know?" Noctis was nearly shouting now, enough to get Weskham to come closer to the bar. Noctis slid off the stool and started to walk away, but guilt overcame him briefly. Ignis was suffering. Suffering enough to go drinking alone. He decided to soften his tone.

"The news reports said no body was found," Noctis said, his stomach turning at the thought of Luna's corpse, "why were you so certain she had passed?" It  _was_ a fair question. After a long pause, Ignis finally answered.

"During my coma I had what can only be described as a near death experience." Noctis wore a puzzled expression on his face and climbed back onto his barstool. It sounded very similar to his own experience.

"Did you see her?" Noctis asked.

"Yes. She was peaceful, and beautiful. I didn't want to leave," Ignis said, his mind recalling the contentment he felt resting in the field of sylleblossoms. Noctis was realizing for the first time that his adviser had nearly perished himself.

"Were you dying?" Noctis blurted out.

"They told me I was in shock-they had a difficult time stabilizing me," Ignis answered. The thought of losing Luna  _and_ Ignis sent a chill down Noct's spine.

"But you're OK now?" Noctis didn't really understand Ignis' injury. He felt guilty for not bothering to find out sooner.

"I'm in no immediate danger of death," Ignis replied. Noct breathed a sigh of relief.

"What did Luna say to you?"

"She told me that she had passed and that it was not yet my time," Ignis answered. He hadn't mentioned it to anyone, in part because he assumed no one would believe it.

"So that's how you knew," Noctis said quietly staring down at his hands.

"It is. I realize it sounds implausible, but I am certain it was no dream."

"I believe you."

"Noct...I'm so sorry," Ignis couldn't express how much the death of Luna had affected him. How sorry he was Noctis would never marry the woman he loved.

"There's nothing you can do about it now," Noctis replied. The remark stung Ignis. He knew Luna's death wasn't his fault, but he couldn't shake the feeling. Perhaps he had made a tactical error. Perhaps if he'd only been more cautious about Ardyn in the first place. He couldn't even remember enough about what had happened to determine what went wrong. He was pulled from his thoughts by a familiar voice.

"That's nice. You two are getting hammered without us," Gladio said, intentionally interrupting the tense conversation. Prompto followed behind him.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to be doing any driving," Ignis quipped.

"Very funny. But hangovers still don't mix well with long boat rides." Gladio had no intention of loitering around Maagho's any longer, but Weskham had different plans.

"Why don't you two sit down. I'll comp you a round of drinks," Weskham offered. Prompto immediately took a seat next to Ignis.

"I'll have a bone-dry martini, please," Prompto requested.

"Yeah right. He'll have a Jetty's," Gladio said as he took a seat next to Prompto, "I'll have straight whiskey." Weskham smiled, satisfied that tensions were easing.

"I didn't say you get to pick your poison. We're having brandy." Weskham pulled out some snifter glasses and gave each man a healthy pour. They chatted amicably for a while-almost like old times-but Ignis and Noctis were both more quiet than usual. By the time he was through with the brandy, Ignis felt very drowsy. He was only hearing every third word of the conversation and it was an effort to hold his head up. It reminded him of the heavy fatigue he'd feel during those interminable, late afternoon meetings at the Citadel. The fatigue that sparked his love of Ebony.

"Well, gentleman, I hate to be unsociable, but I'm about to lose consciousness. It's best I do that in my room," Ignis said before stepping down from the barstool. He picked up his cane leaning against the bar. He took one step and felt a little wobbly.

"You aren't going alone. Not after that much booze," Gladio said.

"I'll be fine," Ignis replied. Gladio looked to Noctis-hoping he would take a hint and help his friend-but the embattled king just mindlessly sipped his drink. Gladio grunted and hopped off his barstool. He closed the distance between himself and Ignis in a couple of steps. He gripped Ignis' right forearm and walked towards the gondola station.

Ignis wasn't drunk, but he did find it a little more difficult to navigate with the cane after the drinks. He overshot the edge of the gondola station by a hair. Gladio had to keep him from falling into the water.

"Thank you, that would have been a little embarrassing," Ignis said as Gladio directed him into the small boat.

"Do you remember when you got wasted after you were officially made a member of the Crownsguard?" Gladio's father, Clarus, had hosted a small party at his home for the new recruits. Ignis had just turned 18. His recollection of the celebration was very hazy.

"I remember there was a cake," Ignis said. Gladio laughed genuinely.

"Yeah there was a cake. And tons of booze." Ignis remembered more about the following morning. It wasn't a pleasant memory.

"I was not used to drinking at the time," Ignis admitted, trying to excuse the night.

"Yeah, I wish you'd told me that before I gave you all that moonshine," Glaido confessed.

"At least you made sure to throw up outside," Gladio said smiling at the memory.

"I did that?" Ignis asked, genuinely surprised.

"Yeah, not your finest hour." Ignis held a hand to his forehead and shook his head, feeling completely ashamed.

"My apologies to your family," Ignis said.

"Don't worry about it. My dad actually thought it was hilarious." Gladio felt an icy twinge in his heart at the mention of his father. He had barely spoken to him before he left with Noctis. Now his father was lying dead in the Citadel; still waiting for a proper burial. He pushed the thought out of his mind.

"I do distinctly remember waking up on your living room couch," Ignis recalled.

"Iris screamed when she saw you," Glado laughed, "I should have told her you were staying." It gave Gladio peace to know Iris was safe at Caem. It gave him even more peace to know Ignis would soon be safe there with her.

"That screeching did wonders for my migraine," Ignis answered with a smile.

"You can ask her if she remembers when you see her tomorrow," Gladio said. The reference to Caem caused Ignis' demeanor to change. They were mostly quiet for the rest of the gondola ride. Ignis was contemplating how he might avoid the exile to Caem. Gladio was fondly remembering embarrassing Ignis stories and hoping his decision to force him back to Caem wouldn't be the end of their friendship.

* * *

Ignis slept surprisingly well. He decided the gin and brandy had actually had a positive effect on his sleep cycle. It was a dangerous thought. He was in no risk of developing a dependency on the pain medication, but if he started to rely on alcohol to fall asleep…

He got up and was dressed by 6 am, as he normally was. Cid had planned to depart no later than 7 am. Prompto met him in the lobby and helped him to the dock. Both Noctis and Gladio were already waiting for them. Cid was idling behind them.

"All packed and ready to go?" Cid asked, trying to sound cheerful.

"I'm afraid I won't be joining you after all, Cid." Ignis could hear Prompto sharply draw in a breath as he said it.

"You're what now?" Cid asked.

"I'm not going back to Caem," Ignis stated plainly.

"The hell you're not," Gladio interrupted. Ignis knew his decision was going to lead to conflict-there was no way it could be avoided.

"My place is by Noctis' side." Ignis stopped leaning on his cane stood as straight as he could; he didn't want to appear weak in anyway. Gladio turned towards Noctis, starting to fear that his plan was falling apart.

"Noct, tell him he has to go back," Gladio urged. He knew a command from Noctis would be one of the only things that could convince Ignis to stand down.

"Why? What difference does it make? He can do what he wants," Noctis replied. The response seemed disinterested and flippant. Gladio was livid. In his mind, allowing Ignis to continue on their journey was a death sentence. He wasn't even able to spar at a basic level. Gladio's plan to protect Ignis was falling apart due to what he perceived as Noctis' callousness.

"He'll have some time to recover on our way to Tenebrae," Prompto suggested. He couldn't stand the conflict between Gladio and Ignis. He'd been witnessing it escalate for days. Gladio glanced back at Noctis. He knew there was no hope of winning this fight unless he physically foeced Ignis onto the boat.

"Fine, have it your way," Gladio said angrily, "but I wash my hands of this." He pushed past Ignis, intentionally clipping his shoulder as he went. It knocked Ignis off balance, but not enough to make him fall.  _'You made your point,'_ Ignis thought. He hoped Gladio would eventually come to understand the decision he'd made.

"Thank you, Noct," Ignis said.

"Don't mention it," Noctis replied with a lazy wave and started back towards the Leville. Ignis had known Noctis long enough to realize that his flippant attitude was an expression of his suffering and not a lack of regard. Nevertheless, Ignis was pained by the seeming lack of interest Noctis showed in his condition-even if he couldn't admit it to himself. Prompto followed Noctis as he passed by.

"You coming?" Prompto asked.

"Yes, just a moment. I'll catch up," Ignis replied and moved closer to the still stunned Cid.

'I'm sorry for the confusion," Ignis said politely. Cid waved him off.

"I'm always confused, don't worry about it."

"I had a favor to ask of you." Ignis balanced his cane on one arm and reached into his jacket pocket. He produced an envelope with moogles emblazoned on it. He'd purchased it in the Leville gift shop shortly after they first arrived. Iris had told him it was the "moogle capital of the world".

"What's this?"

"It's for Iris. It contains a recipe for an Altissian dessert I think she will like," Ignis said as he handed the attractive envelope to Cid. The recipe in question was for Kupoberry Cheesecake, a delicacy invented specifically for the popular carnival that took place in Altissia each year. It was also a letter of gratitude, but Ignis decided to share that message only with its reader.

"She'll love it," Cid said as he accepted it, "but she'll be disappointed you aren't coming. She's a little fed up with Talcott...and me." Ignis smirked. He knew that combination must be a little trying.

"Please pass on my best wishes to her," Ignis said warmly. He was truly grateful for her willingness to help and perhaps overly sensitive to her feelings after the nightmare he'd had.

"I will. Godspeed, buddy," Cid replied. Ignis nodded towards his fellow Crownsguard veteran and headed back towards the Leville. He needed to make sure everything was packed before they set out into the open ocean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've decided to continue this a little further because the game leaves a huge gap at the end of ch. 9 and the start of ch. 10. I do have to make a few assumptions about how the guys travel to the train. More on that in the next chapter. As always, thanks for reading and commenting!


	16. Chapter 16

Ignis sat in the hospital waiting room which was still crowded with the injured from the battle with Leviathan. He leaned against his cane; clutching a pastel scarf in his right hand. He found it difficult to be calm. The strong smell of rubbing alcohol was a powerful reminder of his recent stay. Thankfully, he did not have to wait long for Julia to arrive.

"Is everything alright?" Julia knew Ignis was waiting for her, but she hadn't been given any other information.

"Yes, everything is fine. I just came to return this scarf to you." Ignis stood up and handed her the pretty garment. She looked at it for a few moments, recalling the night she went to his hotel room.

"I suppose this means you're leaving?" She asked without looking up from the scarf.

"Yes, we depart in a matter of hours," he explained, "we'll set sail for Tenebrae aboard the  _Imperator_."

"That's the Nif name for that ship," Julia said with a little contempt in her voice for the foreign invaders, "it was built by the people of Accordo."

"I'm sure it is an impressive vessel," Ignis responded. He had learned a little about the ship from Prompto. It was a large, steam powered ocean liner. Even though it was technologically inferior to ships found in Niflheim, it surpassed the empire in terms of luxury. Wealthy Nifs in particular liked to travel aboard the ship.

"It's luxurious. They have the most beautiful dining room I have ever seen." Julia regretted her choice of words immediately, but she knew Ignis didn't prefer to be treated as though he had fragile emotions.

"I trust our voyage will be a pleasant one."

"I think you know I would rather you stay here," Julia said finally, "but you must do your duty." She knew Ignis has the resilience to continue on the journey, but in her medical opinion, he needed more recovery time.

"I can't thank you enough for everything that you have done," Ignis said warmly.

"I was honored to help you--I only wish I could continue to." She looked up into his face and studied his scar for a moment. It had healed considerably since he had left the hospital, but it would be a long time before the wound was fully mended. "Just promise me that you'll ask for help when you need it, alright?"

"I promise I'll try," he replied with a hint of a smile. They both knew that asking for help wasn't exactly in his nature. A voice over the intercom asks for Julia to report back to her floor. It was time to say goodbye. Ignis wasn't one for public displays of affection, but he knew Julia would want a hug. He leaned his cane against the chair and held out his arms towards her. She smiled at the obvious invitation for an embrace. She wrapped her arms around his torso, scarf still clutched in her right hand. Ignis gingerly encircled her with his arms.

"I'll miss you so much--even your stubbornness," she said suppressing the tears that threatened. Ignis found the embrace more comforting than he had expected to. He thought about his mother for the first time in a long time. She had doted on him when he was very small, but once he'd gone to boarding school things changed. Many things had changed.

"And I'll miss you," he replied. She pulled away from the embrace first.

"I better get back to my patients. Please make sure to get a proper amount of sleep," she said as she started to back away, "And don't skip meals!"

"I'll do my best. Goodbye, Julia." Ignis smiled at her motherly advice.  _Is that how I sound to Noctis?_ He picked up his cane and started for the dock.

* * *

 

First Secretary Claustra managed to secure first class accommodation for Noctis and his Crownsguard. The rooms were in a galley style layout. The door opened on to a small sitting room with a couch and armchair. It was divided from the first bedroom with a curtain. It had two reasonably sizes beds on either side of the room. The carpet was plush and the bed linens were the finest quality. The second bedroom was just down the hall (separated by curtains) and nearly identical in layout. It had a large window revealing a beautiful view of the ocean. The most luxurious thing of all was the ensuite bathroom attached to the second bedroom. Ignis and Noctis claimed the first room.

The ship itself was like nothing any of them had ever experienced. It had a famous two tier dining room with an expansive skylight. It also featured an opulent central staircase leading to the lower decks. It winded down in an elegant shape around a golden caged elevator in the middle. It even had an indoor pool modeled on an Altissian bath.

Ignis, unfortunately, was denied the pleasure of seeing all these new sights. Nevertheless, he was at first quite happy that he'd been able to continue their journey.  But after nearly a week at sea, Ignis was disappointed at his slow rate of recovery. He tried to remain positive, but he was finding it harder and harder to maintain his usual spirit. He was still frequently in pain. The wound over his left eye no longer caused the agony it initially did, but he was having wound site sensitivity and headaches--sometimes severe. The doctors had warned him that it was a possibility because his facial nerves were damaged by the wound.

To make matters worse, his sleep cycles were thrown out of whack by the eternal darkness he found himself in. He lay awake in his bed most nights, trying to fall asleep. Tonight was one of those nights. After an hour spent tossing and turning in his comfortable bed, Ignis decided it was time to go for a swim. He slipped out of bed and pulled on his casual clothes, eschewing his button down for his Crownsguard Henley. It wasn't important to be finely dressed at 1:00am.

* * *

 

The swimming pool was on one the of the lower decks-easily accessible via the gilded elevator next to the central staircase. The pool was surrounded by marble columns and a mosaic tile deck. It was lavish and beautiful, but Ignis couldn't appreciate its visual appeal. Since there was no one else around, he wasted no time changing into his swim trunks. Prompto had insisted they all bring swimwear-he was convinced they'd stay at a hotel with a pool at some point. Ignis smiled at the memory. Things had started off so innocently and carefree.

Using his cane, he felt for the shallow end steps and gradually descended into the water. Ignis immediately ducked under water and quickly re-surfaced in an attempt to acclimate himself to the water's temperature. He ran his hands through his hair, pushing the long bangs away from his face. It was good to be in a pool again. He had spent a lot of time in the pool at the Citadel gym; he preferred it to the weight training that many trainees engaged in. He had become quite a good swimmer.

He found the edge of the shallow end and started swimming freestyle laps. The warm water soothed his aching neck and shoulders (days of not sleeping well had taken their toll). Even though he was out of practice, he swam the length of the pool quite quickly. After ten laps, he took a break--he was getting tired too quickly, but in this particular instance, that's what he was hoping for. After catching his breath, he decided to do ten laps of the breaststroke. He was finally starting to feel at peace, but by the fifth lap something changed. His heart rate started to climb, and he felt a little claustrophobic.

He endeavored to push past it and keep swimming, but the splashing of the water was impossible to ignore. It kept getting louder; to the point that he could no longer stand it. He started to feel a little short of breath and suddenly he had a completely irrational fear that he might drown. He knew it was impossible--he was too good of a swimmer. Nevertheless, he couldn't catch his breath; it felt like his throat was closing shut. Suddenly images of the wall of water of water that Leviathan had created flickered before his mind's eye.  It was an overwhelming, panic inducing, feeling. He swam to the edge of the pool and held on to the deck. It took a good twenty minutes before he felt calmer, and able to breathe easily.

Using the deck as a guide, he found his way back to the shallow end stairs. He climbed out and carefully made his way back to the bench where he left his clothes. He dried off quickly and pulled them back on.  It made him feel weak, but he didn't want to be alone.  He made his way back to the elevator.

* * *

 

Ignis made as little noise as possible when he came back. He decided returning to the bedroom might be enough to wake the others so he decided to take the couch in the sitting room. He didn't mind the downgrade in sleeping arrangements, since he didn't expect to sleep much anyway. He felt for the cushions of the luxurious, feather stuffed couch and sprawled out. He was thankful to find a light blanket draped over the back of the sofa. His hair was still damp and the cold air of the room actually made him shiver.

He pulled the blanket over him and turned on his side facing the back of the couch. He was still highly anxious after the episode he'd experienced in the pool. He was slowly coming to the realization that he had more than just physical damage from the injury. He expected to feel melancholic, and anxious from what had happened. Anyone would. He hadn't expected to be the victim of panic attacks.  _Post-traumatic stress disorder._ His doctor had warned him it was a real possibility after such a severe injury. Ignis refused to believe he had it. He was too mentally strong for something like that. It couldn't possibly happen to him. Or so he believed. Now it was becoming impossible to deny that he was experiencing some symptoms of it.

He pulled the blanket more tightly around him. He closed his right eye and tried a controlled breathing technique for pain management he had learned during basic Crownsguard training. Before long, he finally drifted off into an uneasy sleep knowing that it was more than just his flesh that needed healing.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm flying blind a little bit now (sorry Ignis!) because the game doesn't say much about the "several weeks" period prior to the train scene. I decided the bros must have traveled on a ship big enough to bring the Regalia along and travel deep water ocean. Altissia seems like a modern country, but not as technologically advanced as Lucis or Niflheim, so I opted for a 20th ocean liner. "The Imperator" was actually a real ship! It was a German ocean liner that was commandeered after WWI. You should check out some pictures. As always, thank you for reading and commenting—it is much appreciated.


	17. Chapter 17

" _Your father would be so proud of you," Lady Scientia said as she adjusted her five year old son's tie, "you look so handsome." Ignis could see tears in his mother's eyes. He was ready to cry himself-he didn't want to go to boarding school._

" _Will you come see me?" he asked. Ignis felt like he was being banished._

" _Of course I will, sweetheart!" she knelt down and hugged Ignis closer to her. It pained her to send him away, but she knew it was for the best._

" _Always remember that I love you. More than anything in the world."_

" _I love you too, Mama." Ignis rested his head against his mother's shoulder, stalling the inevitable separation..._

* * *

"Hey Iggy," Gladio said as he squeezed his friend's shoulder, "wake up." Ignis was slow to respond; he was still in a deep sleep.

"...Mother?" he said very groggily and started to stir. Gladio turned to Noctis, who was standing next to him, and mouthed 'mother?' with a very puzzled expression on his face.

"C'mon, wake up," Gladio said it a little more like a command this time. Ignis finally awoke. He rolled onto his back and draped his arm over his eyes. He preferred to keep his wounds covered.

"I think this is the first time in my life, I was awake before you," Noctis observed.

"There's a first time for everything," Ignis answered; his voice still heavy with sleep.

"We're going to go get some breakfast, hurry up." Gladio was obviously very hungry. Ignis reached for his sunglasses sitting on the end table near the couch and slipped them on. He sat up and rubbed his shoulder a little. The night on the couch had done nothing to improve his muscle aches.

"Are you OK?" Prompto asked. "You look a little green." Gladio placed his hand over Ignis' forehead; giving him a good startle.

"No fever, he's fine." Gladio said as Ignis firmly, but politely, pushed his arm away.

"I am not ill," Ignis explained, "perhaps a little seasick."

"You get seasick too?" Prompto asked.

"Evidently," was the extent of Ignis' answer. He didn't feel like discussing his health.

"There's a doctor on the middle deck. He's got the good stuff," Prompto explained. He was referring to a drug for motion sickness, but to an untrained Prompto interpreter it would have sounded much worse.

"Perhaps I will pay him a visit." Ignis wanted nothing less than to visit with a doctor, but it was probably a wise choice.  _Perhaps he might have something for insomnia too_.

"I'm starving, let's go," Gladio announced.

"You guys go on, Ignis and I will catch up," Noctis said. He could see that Ignis needed a few minutes at least. Ignis was thankful for the intervention. Prompto and Gladio acquiesced, leaving the king and his adviser alone.

"Just let me put on a shirt," Ignis said; he didn't want to keep Noctis from a proper meal.

"You already have a shirt."

"It's not a  _proper_ shirt."

"Suit yourself," Noctis said as he tossed Ignis his white button-down. Ignis smiled at the pun and started to put it on. He had to take his time to feel for each button. It was painful for Noctis to watch. He hadn't yet come to accept Ignis' condition; he still held out hope that one morning Ignis would wake up with his vision back.

"Could I trouble you for a comb?" Ignis knew his hair would be a mess and he wanted to make himself presentable. Noctis placed one in his friend's outstretched hand. He wanted to say something encouraging, but everything he thought of sounded cliché or patronizing. Ignis had always been his comforter. Now that Ignis was the one in need, Noctis simply didn't know what to do.

Ignis combed his long bangs away from his face. He didn't have the time or the motivation to style it. When Ignis stood up, he felt a little wobbly. He still wasn't used to sea travel. Noctis noticed and helpfully picked up his cane.

"Here you go," Noct said as he held it out in front of him. Ignis awkwardly reached for it, having no clear idea of where it was. Noctis felt guilty and Ignis felt embarrassed. Noctis directed the handle towards Ignis' open hand.

"Thank you. Lead the way," Ignis said, trying to sound somewhat normal. Noctis nodded and headed for the dining room. Ignis navigated largely by the sound of his footsteps. It was going to take some time for them to learn how to be comfortable with one another again.

* * *

"You can take one of these every 4-6 hours, but do not take more than 8 in 24 hours," the doctor said as he took a bottle of motion sickness tablets and placed them in a small bag. "Drowsiness is one of the side effects, so it would be wise to avoid alcohol while you are taking them."

"That's a side effect I wouldn't mind," Ignis replied as he accepted the bag; he hadn't meant to say it out loud.

"Are you experiencing insomnia?" the doctor asked.

"A little bit, yes," Ignis admitted.

"Not surprising after what you've been through." Ignis suddenly got tense. They had been trying to keep a relatively low profile on the ship-they didn't need any unwanted Nif attention. Even though Ignis' wounds were still very obvious (the doctor would naturally assume he'd been badly hurt), but he had not shared any details of his role in the battle of Altissia with the physician.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Ignis replied, not very convincingly. The doctor laughed softly.

"Don't worry, I'm from Accordo. I'm sympathetic to your cause. I won't make trouble for you." Ignis wanted to believe him and he really had no choice at this point.

"The battle was...intense," Ignis admitted, "but I'm much improved."

"You'll have a few nasty scars, but the wounds are healing well." The doctor decided not to bring up Ignis' sight. It was obvious to him that there was no way the young man's sight was going to improve with the amount of corneal scarring he had.

"The pain has certainly eased," Ignis added. After a pause, the doctor spoke again.

"But how are you holding up?" It was obviously a question about his emotional health, and that's not something Ignis ever liked to discuss. It's not something he even liked to reflect upon privately.

"I'm well enough," he responded, though the words didn't feel entirely truthful.

"Have you experienced an increased level of anxiety since the injury?" Ignis' standoffish reaction to the question told the doctor everything he needed to know.

"Naturally, there is more to be concerned about now. Learning to walk with this accursed cane, for one," he said as he held up the Accordo crafted item, "but I wouldn't say it is anything of clinical interest."

"I didn't say that it was," the doctor replied innocently, "but after an injury like that, it's wise to consider some counselling." Ignis smirked—'counselling' usually meant 'medicating'.

"I appreciate the advice, but I'm managing on my own," Ignis said.

"Still, it would be wise to see a professional therapist. I can make some referrals-

"I am on a mission. I do not have time to lie on a couch and talk about my feelings," Ignis answered testily. The idea of stopping on their way to Gralea in order for him to meet with a mental health professional was absurd.

"Very well. If you need anything else, please don't hesitate to stop in." Ignis nodded and turned to leave. He knew the doctor's advice was reasonable, but he was tired of being treated. He didn't want to be a patient any longer. The one thing he wanted to cure, his eyesight, was likely never going to heal. He didn't see the point of spending any more time with physicians. He'd handle this on his own.

* * *

The four friends had dinner together in the luxurious central dining room. Prompto was especially impressed with the skylight and took dozens of photos. The motion sickness drug had done much to improve Ignis' appetite and he felt a little more himself after a pleasant meal. Once the entrée plates were cleared, the waiter asked if they wanted dessert. Noctis, Prompto and Gladio each ordered coffees, but Ignis didn't want to risk caffeinating himself into more insomnia. He ordered a glass of Madeira instead.

It was unusual for Ignis to order an after dinner drink. Noctis and Gladio in particular seemed to take note. Ignis did briefly think about the doctor's warning and cynically decided he would like to be as drowsy as possible before turning in for the night. It was an uncharacteristic bit of recklessness on his part. The table grew quiet as they sipped their drinks. Ignis found the warm, sweet dessert wine to be quite enjoyable. Before long, he had finished the glass. The entirely too solicitous waiter soon returned.

"Sir, would you like another glass?" the waiter asked. Ignis turned in his general direction.

"Thank you, that would be wonderful." The waiter produced the bottle from a cart and deftly poured Ignis a new glass. Prompto and Gladio started chattering about the ship, while Noctis and Ignis remained mostly quiet. Ignis sipped his drink and Noctis stared at his adviser. It unsettled Noctis to see him so withdrawn-and drinking no less. Ignis felt fairly drowsy by the time he was halfway through the second glass and was thankful for it.

"Hey Iggy, how big is this ship?" Prompto asked-knowing Ignis would be the most likely to have gathered that information. The question took Ignis by surprise, he hadn't been following the conversation.

"I'm not certain, actually," he replied, without really directing his attention to the conversation. All three found that a little troubling. Ignis  _always_ had an answer-no matter what the question. Nevertheless, the chat continued on without him. It was a pleasant, familiar background sound that made him feel comfortable. He nodded off for a moment but managed to catch himself. Gladio noticed.

"You doin' alright?" Gladio asked.

"Yes, I'm fine, just a little tired."

'Maybe you should turn in early," Prompto wisely suggested.

"I will, just as soon as I finish this drink," Ignis explained and took another healthy draught of the Madeira.

"Maybe you should just leave it," Gladio answered.

"Why would I waste exceptionally good Madeira?' Ignis asked, his temper quickly flaring up.

"Because you've already had quite a bit."

"Hardly. Two small glasses, is not much," Ignis insisted. His former peace and calm was being replaced with irritation. Prompto and Noctis were both getting uncomfortable-the tension between their two friends was obvious.

"You of all people should know that sometimes it doesn't take that much," Gladio replied. Ignis' demeanor suddenly changed from irritation to anger and...hurt perhaps? Prompto was very upset and confused by the display. Ignis drained the rest of his wine and abruptly stood up from the table. He felt for his wallet and withdrew a few gil. He tossed them onto to the table for the waiter.

"Good night gentleman, I'll see you in the morning…Well, I suppose you'll see me in the morning anyway," Ignis said. It was his usual dark humor, but it had such an edge that no one could find it particularly funny. He slowly made his way back to the central stairs.

"Ignis, wait." Gladio was clearly feeling remorseful, but it wasn't entirely obvious why. When Ignis didn't respond, Gladio sat back down.

"What was that about?" Prompto asked. Looking first to Gladio then to Noctis. They seemed to know something he didn't.

"I guess you don't know do you?" Gladio asked.

"Obviously not!"

"Noct, I think he deserves to know at this point. You should tell him, you know more about it than I do," Gladio said as he turned his attention back to his coffee. Prompto whipped around to look at Noctis.

"Tell me what?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter and the next are based on *one* of my theories about Ignis' parentage. We hear hardly anything in the game about his family—we only know about his uncle. I found it really strange, that we don't hear anything about them, so I've developed some theories. Sorry for the cliffhanger! We'll learn more about Ignis' early family life in the next chapter. As always, thanks for reading and commenting!
> 
> *PS: The next update might be a little late—I have a busy work week coming up.*


	18. Chapter 18

Ignis was troubled and distracted as he made his way back to the room. Gladio's offhand remark had brought back some unpleasant memories of his early life that he had endeavored to suppress. His mind first wandered to his father-a man whose face he could barely bring to mind anymore.

His father was a respected academic that much Ignis knew for certain. Future research revealed that his father had PhDs in linguistics and history, but also considered himself an anthropologist. He taught one class per term at the university in Insomnia and spent the rest of his time researching and writing. Ignis had more definite memories of his mother. She was a strikingly pretty woman with champagne blonde hair and the same blue-green eyes that her son later inherited. She was originally from Tenebrae, but spent most of her life in Insomnia with her diplomat father.

Dr. Scientia had met Ignis' mother at a party in the Citadel. He hated such gatherings, but was happy he attended that one. The two talked about her home country, the Oracle, religion-anything that came to mind. By the time the evening was over, they were both quite smitten and it wasn't long before they were married.

They were a happy couple made even happier by the arrival of their first and only child on February 7th, M.E. 734. For almost 4 years, Ignis experienced a loving home life. His mother doted on him. His father attempted to ensure that his son learned good manners, but Ignis was such a well behaved child that it was easy to indulge him. He was also a fast learner; Dr. Scientia was able to teach him to read by the time he was 3. His mother talked continually of visiting Tenebrae and told her young son stories about her homeland. All of that bliss suddenly changed in M.E. 738.

Because he was an expert on Galahdian customs and language, King Regis asked Dr. Scientia to accompany a diplomatic mission to the occupied region. Niflheim had conquered the region years earlier, but since tensions had calmed, Regis was hopeful that some arrangement could be made that would allow some of the many Galahdian refugees in Insomnia to return to their homes. The talks got off to an uneasy start, and were ended early after a group of Galahdian freedom fighters set off a devastating fire elemancy attack at the conference.

Dozens were killed in the attack-including Ignis' father. Niflheim used it as an excuse to further crush the Galahdian people resulting in even more refugees arriving in Insomnia and created a deeper rift between the people of Insomnia and the refugees. It led some to believe Niflheim itself was behind the attack.

Lady Scientia initially refused to believe the reports, clinging to the hope that her husband was still alive, but in a matter of days Dr. Scientia's body was recovered. Ignis was barely 4 at the time and couldn't really comprehend everything that was happening. He just knew that his mother was profoundly sad and that his father was never coming home. Dr. Scientia was buried in Insomnia and awarded the highest civilian honors that Regis could confer. Ignis vividly recalled trying to comfort his mother at the funeral. It frightened him to see her so distraught; it made him sick to think of it even as a grown man.

When Ignis finally reached their suite, he wearily made his way over to the bed. He crawled in without bothering to get undressed. He turned towards the wall and pulled the covers close to his head. He struggled to think of something besides his mother at that funeral, but he was so exhausted that it wasn't long before he drifted into an uneasy sleep.

* * *

 

"It's about his mother--Ignis' mother," Gladio revealed. Prompto had a surprised look on his face.

"I didn't even know he had a mom," Prompto blurted out, half-joking.

"Everyone's got a mom, Prompto." Prompto averted Gladio's gaze after the comment. Noctis sighed deeply and folded his hands on the table. He stared at them as Gladio talked.

"It was an open secret at the Citadel that Ignis' mom had a drinking problem," Gladio began. Prompto was stunned. "After Iggy's dad died, she just kind of snapped." All of this was new to Prompto. He had no idea Ignis had such a difficult childhood.  _Maybe that's why he never likes to talk about it._

"I remember when it happened because Ignis suddenly disappeared from school," Gladio continued. The two had been classmates for a short time. "Turns out, his mom got so bad that she couldn't take care of Iggy anymore. She dumped him off at a boarding school. Noct would know more about that," Gladio concluded.

"I don't know everything, I just know a little," Noctis explained, squirming in his seat. He felt like he was betraying a confidence. "Ignis was one of the smartest kids in that school, that's why my dad picked him to be my advisor."

"Wait, he was your advisor when he was a kid?"

"Since I was 3 and he was….6, I think." Noctis hadn't thought about it for a long time. Ignis was such a permanent feature of his life; it was hard to remember when he first met him. Almost every childhood memory he had involved Ignis.

"If he wasn't at school, he was pretty much with me," Noctis explained.

"When they had breaks at school, he would usually stay with his uncle at the Citadel," Gladio added.

"Oh yeah. I met Mr. Scientia before we left." Prompto had met a number of people at the Citadel when he'd gone to do basic Crownsguard training. He shuddered when he considered the likelihood that Ignis' uncle had been killed in the attack on Insomnia.

"He stayed at my place a few times too. My parents loved him, they always gave me more shit after he left," Gladio laughed at the memory, "they wanted me to be more like him." Gladio's mirth quickly evaporated when he recalled the next part.

"My dad always said Iggy's mom was 'a good person in tragic circumstances' or something like that. I always thought that was BS. Sure, she had it tough, but she had a little kid. She should have taken care of him." Prompto and Noctis didn't know how to reply to that.

"What happened to her?" Prompto asked, almost afraid to hear more. Noct took a deep breath and decided to answer it.

"Ignis was supposed to go with me and my dad to Tenebrae," Noctis said, referring to the trip he'd made 12 years ago in an attempt to heal his severe wounds following a daemon attack, "but he couldn't go because his mom was so sick." Noctis remembered being frightened to go on the journey without Ignis.

"Ignis has never really said anything about what happened," Gladio added, "but whatever she had, it must have been really serious."

"By the time we got back," Noctis explained, his voice catching a little, "she had already passed away." Prompto gasped. He wasn't expecting that. Noctis vividly remembered his father hugging Ignis tightly after he learned the news. It was the first and only time he had seen Ignis cry. Despite all of that, Ignis was just as calm and reliable as he'd always been even though he was just 10 years old. Even so, Noctis felt guilty for not comforting him more at the time, but he was just a child himself when it happened.

"It really sucks, but she made a lot of bad choices." Gladio's words came across even harsher than he'd intended.

"My dad said she died from a broken heart," Noctis said, realizing it sounded a little naive. Neither Gladio nor Prompto responded, choosing to respect King Regis' words. After a long pause, Prompto spoke.

"So that's why you were worried about Ignis having drinks…"

"Yeah...it's not that Ignis has a problem. He doesn't. But it can become a problem real quick once you let alcohol become medicine." Gladio sounded like he had a little experience himself.

"Ignis would never do that….he'd never," ' _abandon me like that'_ Noctis thought, but he didn't say it.

"He's never said anything about this before," Prompto said, still trying to come to terms with everything he'd just heard.

"Would you?" Gladio asked incredulously. Prompto didn't reply. He had his own secrets he preferred not to discuss.

"And if he doesn't want to talk about it, neither should we," Noctis said as he stood up, "I'm going to bed." Prompto and Gladio watched Noctis head up the central staircase. Gladio finally turned to Prompto.

"He just can't get it through his head that Ignis is not OK."

"Yeah, but he will be and I'm going to help him," Prompto said, determined to support his friend more than he had before.

"I hope so."

* * *

 

Noctis sat on the edge of his bed for more than a few moments, staring at his adviser's back. He could see that Ignis was fast asleep; his breathing was steady and slow. Noctis was happy for that, he knew Ignis hadn't been sleeping well for almost a week. He hadn't fully considered until dinner that evening that Ignis might really be struggling-that he might really need help and that thought frightened him.

Ignis was the one person in his life he could always rely on, who was always there. Not once had Ignis abandoned him. In combat, he could rely on him for support and protection. In life he could expect wise advice, even if he refused to take it. He thought Ignis had continued on because he was ready and able to. Noctis hadn't considered the possibility that Ignis had really pushed himself too far. Noct leaned back against his pillows and looked at the ceiling. He was starting to wonder why  _he_ had continued on.

"Maybe we should both just go back," Noctis whispered to himself. He turned to look at Ignis again and felt tears sting his eyes. He felt so unmoored, so far from home. When he heard Prompto and Gladio enter the room he closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep. As they passed by, Prompto stopped to pick up Ignis' jacket which must have slipped off the end of the bed. Noct watched him, careful not to show that he was awake. Prompto considerately draped the jacket over the foot of the bed and walked out of the room. ' _I should have done that',_ Noctis thought to himself.

As he started to drift off to sleep, he called to mind the many nights Ignis would read to him as he recovered from his childhood injury. He always behaved like the stories bored him, but the truth was he loved them. And he was always so grateful when Ignis would come to read to him. He smiled at the memories, particularly at Ignis' frustration whenever Noct would insult the good quality literature he brought. The memories warmed his heart and Noctis felt more able to sleep. He turned on his side, facing Ignis' back.

"Good night, Specs."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry to hit you with so much unmitigated angst! (and for the late update) There will be some lighter and more positive moments coming soon. As for Ignis' background, I have several theories about it and this is one possibility. Very little is said in the game or in any of the other lore/media surrounding the game (including the Ultimania). Really all we know is that he was "born into the Scientia family". Beyond that, the only relative of Ignis' we meet is his uncle. He has a brief appearance in the web novel/radio drama "Parting Ways".
> 
> The fact that Ignis did not mention his immediate family after the attack on Insomnia made me think they were either gone, or deceased. In "Parting Ways", both Prompto and Gladio go to visit their families (Gladio goes out to dinner with his, Prompto tries to meet up with his parents but they aren't home). But Ignis doesn't meet with his family before leaving. I suspect, if his family was living, or in Insomnia, he would have gone to see them. Thus, I think they are most likely deceased. My interpretation here is one possible way for that to play out. One of the reasons I suspect his mother wasn't a big part of his life is that Ignis is so mature so early. I doubt he was ever really a kid for too long. I do have other crazier theories that I'd be happy to share.
> 
> As always, thanks for reading and commenting. It's much appreciated!


	19. Chapter 19

Ignis was roused from a deep sleep by the rather startling sensation of a cold, wet dog's nose pressing against his cheek. He was disoriented at first; expecting to wake up in the spacious suite on the Imperator, but quickly discovered that he was in a small, stone room that would best be described as a cell.  _And he could see._  At Umbra's urging, he stood up from the cold slab he was lying on and headed for the small slit of light at the opening.

Outside, he was greeted with a spectacular view of the open ocean and two giant, soaring rock formations that looked a little like wings. He breathed in the fresh, sea air and enjoyed the feeling of the warm sun. Once he looked around, he noticed nine giant swords driven into the ground surrounding the small, stone cell from which he had just emerged. It sent a chill down his spine to look at them. Umbra's barking and loud sniffing eventually drew his attention to a narrow path leading between large rocks. He followed the happy canine down the path.

In one sense he  _knew_ it was a dream. How else could he see? How else could he be somewhere other than the Imperator? But at the same time, it felt vividly real, more than real in a sense. When he came to the end of the path, he was standing on a rocky shore. As he scanned the beach for any sign of life, his eyes settled on a familiar looking figure standing facing the surf. Umbra's barking caused the figure to turn around and face Ignis.

"Your majesty," Ignis said instinctually, and bowed before Regis. The king smiled warmly as he approached.

"Come now, there's no need for all that formality. I'm glad to see you again. It's been some time." Regis clasped Ignis' shoulder and looked right into his eyes. Ignis felt a little overwhelmed at the sight of him. Regis was one of the few people Ignis actually looked to for leadership in his life. He needed that now.  _But this is just a dream…_

"This is not just a dream," Regis said with a smirk.

"You can hear my thoughts?"

"I don't have to be able to hear your thoughts to know what you're thinking. Don't forget how long I've known you."

"If this isn't a dream," Ignis began, "does that mean I'm-

"No," Regis said, anticipating the question, "you are in no danger of death." It was Ignis' understanding that his encounter with Regis during his coma was a near death experience.

"I know this is confusing, and doesn't seem to make good logical sense," Regis replied noting the confused expression on Ignis' face, "but the natural and the supernatural never neatly fit into the confines of logic."

"Indeed," Ignis replied, but he couldn't help theorizing about how it might be metaphysically possible for a living person to encounter someone who had already passed on. Regis could tell Ignis needed more explanation.  _Ever the academic, this one._

"You are asleep, and I suppose some might call this a dream, but it's more than that. It's a point of contact between the mortal and the immortal. Dreams are like the afterlife-time and physical space have no meaning in them. It's why we must meet here, and nowhere else." Ignis was still quite perplexed, but he was intrigued by that answer. It made some intuitive sense.

"So I suppose it would be silly to ask if we are on Angelgard island?" Ignis had noticed some characteristics that reminded him of the mysterious island he and his friends had once observed off the Galdin Quay pier. Regis laughed softly.

"Always curious, aren't you?" Regis started to walk along the shore and Ignis followed. Umbra charged off to play in the waves. "To answer your question, it is and it isn't. I'm sorry that's not a very satisfying answer."

"Any particular reason why we are here?" Ignis knew very little about the island. Except that it always made him uneasy to think about it.

"There are Lucian legends suggesting this island would be the resting place of the true king," Regis said his voice somber. Ignis glanced back at the tiny cell surrounded by the giant swords and shuddered.  _Is it a tomb?_

"Does that mean Noctis must travel here?" Ignis asked; they were both well aware of the prophecy and Noctis' role.

"I can't say for certain, but Noctis must be ready for anything."

"Indeed," Ignis replied, but he couldn't hide the concern in his voice.

"I am glad to know you are still by his side," Regis said, sounding relieved, "he needs your guidance more than ever before."

"I'm afraid I am not able to aid Noctis as I once was," Ignis admitted. He felt guilty and he knew that was irrational, but at time she felt like he was abandoning his duty. There were quite a few things he hadn't been able to do for Noctis since he was hurt—cooking was one of them. Ignis still found it impossible to think about  _that_ particular point. The two walked on in silence for a moment before Ignis spoke again.

"It is especially difficult when I wake," he confessed, "when everything goes dark again."

"You've lost your vision, Ignis, and that is a tragedy, but the royal adviser I appointed always saw with his mind first and his eyes second. Sometimes to his own detriment I might add," Regis said with a smile. Ignis absorbed his surroundings once more. It hadn't occurred to him that all of his rich sensory experience was entirely in his mind.

"Everything you see here," Regis explained, "is in your mind alone."

"Mind over matter, then?" Ignis asked with a bit of s smirk.

"Play to your strengths, Ignis," Regis said as he stopped walking and turned fully towards his young friend, "you have a powerful intellect. Rely on it." Ignis was flattered that Regis had such faith in his intelligence, but he wasn't so certain that he could overcome the limitations created by his loss of vision. Regis clasped his hands behind his back and started to walk along the shore again.

"Do you know why I selected you to be Noctis' adviser?" Regis asked. Ignis was intrigued; it's something he had always wanted to know. He had his suspicions.

"Is it because I had the highest marks in my class?" That much was true. Ignis had achieved the best scores on all the tests he'd been given at the very exclusive school his mother had placed him in.

"That was part of it, of course. But that just confirmed what I had suspected-you are exceptional." Ignis was truly surprised to hear it wasn't his academic achievement that won him the post.

"Then what was it, your majesty?"

"I saw you comforting your mother at your father's funeral. To have such composure, and compassion, in a moment like that-at that age-I knew I'd never find anyone more qualified than you to be Noctis' companion and adviser." Ignis felt overwhelmed at the compliment, and the memory. He didn't feel particularly strong at that funeral. It was more of an instinct; a reaction to his mother's suffering. What Regis didn't volunteer, but Ignis had always suspected, was that the king felt partially responsible for what happened to Ignis' father. He felt obligated to ensure that Ignis had the comfort and education he would have received had his father lived.

"I am overwhelmed by such praise," Ignis replied.

"Then perhaps I will offer a little criticism as well," Regis said lightly, "your compassionate nature leads you to help others, but your stubborn, proud nature leads you to refuse help." Ignis couldn't disagree with what Regis had said. He was obstinate when it came to receiving care, help and even love from others.

"I am uncertain if I am as compassionate as you think, but I must own that I can be a little...stubborn at times."

"You do have a gift for understatement. Then promise me this. You will accept the help your friends offer you. They care for you and your well-being. Don't reject their attempts to help." Ignis paused for a moment before replying.

"I will do my best, your majesty. I promise you." Ignis meant every word, but he couldn't help feeling a little defensive. He was a self-sufficient man who never needed help to do anything. It was extraordinarily difficult for him to admit he needed assistance. It felt like it eroded his core sense of self. But he also knew that to accomplish his mission and remain by Noctis's side, he would have to humble himself.

The two continued on their stroll, smiling at the happy dog splashing through the waves in front of them. Ignis took his time to enjoy every element of the landscape. It wouldn't be long before he was in the dark again. The sound of the surf provided a soothing backdrop. Ignis felt genuinely at peace. But the pleasant respite was suddenly interrupted by his phone. The familiar ringtone had a Pavlovian effect on Ignis-he immediately reached for it. But he couldn't find it. It seemed like the noise was increasing in volume.

"It's time for you to go," Regis said.

"Will I see you again soon?"

"I'm afraid I have no control over it. Just remember, Ignis, see with your mind first. You will overcome this." Regis reassuringly squeezed Ignis' shoulder. Ignis tried to speak, but he couldn't. The world of the dream was rapidly disintegrating.

The ringing became more and more insistent….

* * *

 

Ignis woke to the sound of his familiar cell-phone alarm. He reached for it and switched it off-he didn't intend to wake the others just yet. He sat up and  swung his legs over the edge of the bed. He sighed heavily and ran his hands through his hair. It was always a shock to go from a world of vision to darkness. His neck and back objected to the way he'd slept, leaving him with some uncomfortable knots and aches. Despite all of that, he felt a renewed sense of purpose.

He quietly got dressed and fired off a quick voice-to-text explaining where he was going. He hoped it wasn't typo filled and set off to get some coffee. He'd need coffee before anything else.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit of a shorter update, transitioning into the final phase of their sea voyage. It has always seemed to me that Regis and Ignis were close (it's quite evident in Brotherhood). I'm holding out hope we see some interaction between them in Episode Ignis. I think Regis is one of the few people Ignis truly admires. Fun fact: Angelgard island is somewhat explorable thanks to OOB glitching. It's a surprisingly detailed locale.


	20. Chapter 20

After properly caffeinating, Ignis ventured into the first class library on the  _Imperator_. Ignis was surprised to learn the ship had a library at all, let alone three different ones. The library itself was impressive to look at. Unfortunately, Ignis couldn't see and appreciate the ornately carved plaster walls but he could sense some of the light radiating from the giant chandelier hanging from the very high ceiling. Tastefully upholstered couches and chairs were scattered throughout the room-making it quite frustrating for Ignis to navigate.

The selection of books wasn't tremendous, but there were a number of well-stocked mahogany bookcases with glass fronts displaying all of the attractive books. Ignis hadn't thought through how he might find the books he was looking for; he hoped to cross that bridge when he came to it.

He made his way through the large room slowly, carefully feeling for the edge of the numerous sofas and chairs. He was surprised and disheartened to discover that no one else was in the room-it would make it much harder to find the books he wanted. He was distracted long enough to miss a small hassock in his path. He tripped over it; just barely managing to catch himself at the last second, but his right knee still hit the floor.

"Damn it!" he inadvertently cursed aloud.

"Are you alright?" a concerned female voice said. She sounded fairly young-but he couldn't tell her age for certain.

"I'm sorry, for that outburst, I didn't realize there was a lady present." Ignis was genuinely embarrassed. She laughed a little.

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone you were using profanity in a library," she joked. Ignis cringed.

"I have made quite a bad first impression. I promise you I am not normally that vulgar," Ignis explained, starting to feel a little defensive.

"I'm sure you're not. My name's Cecily, by the way," she said. Ignis nearly offered his name in response, but something made him hesitate. He knew they were safe on the  _Imperator,_ but there was no telling what the Nifs might try. He took a risk anyway.

"I'm Ignis," he said as he dusted off his jacket, "pleasure to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too….do you need some help?" she asked, noticing that he was walking with a cane. She seemed like a kind young woman.

"I can manage, but thank you for the concern….I'm still learning to navigate with this blasted cane," he answered. Ignis was making a concerted effort not to get annoyed by offers of help.

"Then you haven't been blind long?" she asked bluntly. Ignis felt like someone had splashed cold water in his face every time someone mentioned that fact to him. Cecily regretted it. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

"It's alright...to answer your question, no I have not."

"Did it happen in Altissia?" she ventured. The question made Ignis wary.  _Why would this girl want to know that?_

"I'd rather not discuss it," he replied. It had the intended effect. She muttered an _"I'm sorry"_ and stopped questioning him. Ignis resumed his trek towards the book cases and thought better of it. He wasn't going to find a book on his own.

"Cecily, would you mind helping me for a moment?"

"I'd be happy to, what do you need?"

"Would you be so kind as to collect any books on Tenebrae you find?"

"Hmm. Those are reference books so they'll be on the top shelf. I'm afraid I can't reach those."

"They usually have step-ladders for that purpose," Ignis suggested.

"Well, I can't exactly use one of those from this wheelchair." Ignis was very surprised.  _Curse this blindness._

"I'm so sorry, I didn't realize-

"Don't worry! You couldn't have known."

"Were you wounded in Altissia?" Now he was asking the unwelcome questions. But something about her made him wonder if she'd been one of the people he'd been tasked with evacuating.

"No, no. I've been like this since I was a little girl. I had a fever that lasted for days. By the time I finally came out of it, I was…like this."

"I'm very sorry to hear it," he said, but he knew it sounded meaningless. He'd heard dozens of people say it to him.

"So I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to help you get that book."

"Maybe you could direct me to the shelf? If you can spot it for me, I can fetch it," he suggested. She seemed to brighten up at that.

"Yes of course." She moved her chair away from a large table with a few books opened on the surface and towards her companion. She touched Ignis' forearm lightly to let him know she was near. He imperceptibly flinched when she did it. Touch was more startling since he'd gone blind but he was trying to control the response.

"You're in luck because the case you want is just about five paces in front of you." She explained. Ignis slowly stepped forward roughly 5 paces. His cane made contact with the edge of the case. "The books are on the second to top shelf, but I think you are tall enough to reach them."

Ignis felt for the latch on the glass front doors of the case. He opened it delicately and reached towards the upper shelves. With a little guidance from Cecily, he found the proper shelf. He started running his hands along the spines of the books, waiting for her to tell him which ones to select. He was getting a little worried when she hadn't flagged a single one.

"There's one!" she said a little too loudly. Ignis pulled the book off the shelf-it was hefty, probably an encyclopedia.

"Any others?"

"I'm afraid not."

"Can you spot anything on Niflheim?"

"Niflheim? Are you headed there? That's where I'm from-I can tell you about it," she explained.  _Great, she's a Nif._

"Actually, I'm more curious about the countryside. Have you heard of a place called Cartanica?" Ignis had been briefed by Cor before they left. Reliable intel suggested there was a Royal Tomb in Cartanica. Ignis was careful not to reveal much to the young woman.

"It's really just a train station-there isn't anything there-except a mine and some industrial stuff, I think. You better grab that geography book. It might have more information." Cecily directed him to the excessively heavy tome.

"Thank you for your assistance," he said as he tucked the books under his arm.

"I hate to ask, but how are you planning on reading those?"

"I'll figure something out," Ignis answered.

"Well I'd be happy to read to you," she volunteered. Ignis was touched, but he was hesitant. He didn't want to reveal anything to someone from Niflheim-even one who seemed so kind. He remembered what Regis had said about accepting help and relented.

"If it would be no trouble."

"It will be fun," she answered. Ignis held the books in her general direction. She took them and sat them on her lap. They both decided to adjourn to the table. Cecily opened the geography book and smoothed the pages. Ignis took one of the first chairs he could find at the head of the table. She paged her way to Niflheim and looked for Cartanica.

"There it is," she said, "it's just a tiny dot."

"Does it have any information on the sorts of creatures that live nearby?" Ignis asked. Ever the strategist, he wanted tactical information.

"What are you planning on doing there?" she asked, a little incredulous.

"Sightseeing," he said with a smirk. Cecily didn't feel like she knew him well enough to laugh at that, but she couldn't suppress a smile. She appreciated his dark sense of humor.

"It doesn't say much….there's a mine there….uhh, a giant tree? That's weird…..Oh! It does say that there are rumored to be 'Malboros' living near the tree deep in the mine, but it notes that it's likely just hunters telling tales."  _Malboros. Not good._

"Thank you that was very enlightening."

"I hope you're not planning on hunting one of those," she said.

"It's certainly not my intention," he replied.

"...because this book claims they can poison you, confuse you and they seem  _'impervious to physical pain'_ " she finished the passage with real concern in her voice.

"I would hate to encounter one of those," he admitted. He had heard of malboros before, and even seen their bounties posted, but the Royal retinue had yet to take one on. He genuinely hoped they wouldn't have to face one.

Ignis and Cecily decided to move on to the book on Tenebrae, having exhausted relevant information about Cartanica. Cecily began reading the table of contents-allowing Ignis to pick his preferred topics. They read basic information about the geography, the government, their history with the Empire. Then they moved onto to the royal family.

" _Fenestala Manor is the home of the Tenebraen royal family, located high in the mountains of Zoldara Henge, and serves as a bridge connecting several areas."_ Cecily read aloud.

"That sounds so beautiful," she added.

"Indeed. I understand there are few locales to rival it."

"Are you from Tenebrae?" She ventured, a little bored with encyclopedia reading now.

"No, I'm from Lucis," Ignis admitted, deciding it was wiser to offer a little true information.

"Really? Have you been to Insomnia? I've heard it's spectacular," she said excitedly.

"It was," he said very somberly. She went quiet for a few moments, realizing that bringing up the subject of Insomnia was a tactless thing to do.

"I'm so sorry for what happened," she said finally, "so many people in Gralea were against it. It was wrong. Most of us don't want this war."

"I don't doubt you," Ignis replied. Based on reports he'd heard, the citizens of Gralea were not faring well under their current leadership.

"It wasn't like this before--the emperor has changed so much," she began, "almost everyone blames the chancellor."

"Ardyn?" Ignis inquired, now genuinely curious what she might know.

"Yes...there are rumors that he's been working on depraved experiments," she made sure to whisper the rest, "involving daemons." Ignis shuddered. He had seen some of the empire's dirty work in that regard.

"And you think he is responsible for the emperor's actions?"

"I'm sure of it-everyone knows."

"Then why hasn't anyone tried to stop him?" Ignis asked, genuinely puzzled at the situation in Nfilheim.

"They have," she said in an emphatic whisper, "there have been multiple assassination attempts." That came as a shock to Ignis. She continued.

"But each one has failed. The media never reports this to the public. From what I've heard, he survived being shot in the back," she said, "how is that possible?" Ignis had a vivid recollection of the moment he sunk one of his daggers deep into Ardyn's back. It only served to anger and amuse the chancellor—not kill him as it should have. Ignis could feel his heart rate increase at the thought of it.

"We probably shouldn't be discussing these things," he said, eager to end the conversation. He nearly jumped out of his seat when he heard an unfamiliar voice.

"Cecily! Where have you been?" her mother cried out-far too loud for a library. "We've been looking all over for you." Cecily's mother made her way quickly to her daughter and took hold of the handles on her wheelchair. In that moment she got a good look at the young man seated at the table. She happened to know he was a Lucian. It was an open secret on the ship.

"Good morning, sir," she said very coolly, "I hope you'll excuse us." Ignis could tell the woman wanted nothing to do with him. He couldn't necessarily blame her. Their countries were at war-even if the ship was neutral territory.

"Of course," Ignis replied, standing up to properly send them off. He bowed slightly in Cecily's general direction.

"Thank you for all of your kind assistance, Cecily, I hope we meet again."

"Me too, Ignis. Good luck on your sightseeing journey!" They both smiled at that-Cecily's mother could tell it was some kind of inside joke and it made her even angrier. As they exited the library, Ignis overheard their conversation (his hearing was already much more acute).

"Cecily, that man is a Lucian soldier. You are never to speak to him again. Do you understand?"

"But mother-

Their voices trailed off as they exited onto one of the main decks. Ignis truly felt sorry for the young woman. She was being pulled into a conflict that she had no part in creating. Then again, weren't they all?

* * *

Ignis leaned over the railing on the port side of the ship. He enjoyed the feeling of the sea breeze ruffling his hair and the salty taste of the air was refreshing. He could tell the sun was starting to set because the temperature had become cooler. He was able to sense a little light, but not enough to really distinguish between different times of the day. A couple strolling by noted how eerily dark it was getting like it was the dead of winter already. Ignis knew the death of Lunafreya would affect the spread of the Starscourge, but he had no idea it would happen so fast.

He found his thoughts wandering back to Niflheim, the Crystal, and Ardyn. They would be making landfall in the enemy country any day now. If Cecily was right, then Gralea might be in more disarray than they had originally thought. It could be a strategic advantage. But if Ardyn had seized power? He had no idea what to expect. The man was capable of anything. Ignis would never forget the moment his eyes met Ardyn's as he lay on the cold, hard Altissia cobblestone….Ignis nearly jumped when he felt a hand touch his shoulder.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." It was Gladio.

"It's quite alright, I just didn't hear you approach" Ignis explained.

"Deep in thought as usual," Gladio observed and settled in next to his friend. He took in the impressive, sublime view of the open water. The setting sun had cast a beautiful ombre-orange glow across the sky. It was beautiful. The two were quiet for some time, listening to the soothing sound of the ship moving through the water.

"About the other night," Gladio finally began, "I was out of line and I'm sorry." Ignis took a deep breath. He was thankful to hear it.

"Perhaps you could have chosen a better time or place, but you were right. I was being careless," Ignis admitted. As much as Gladio's implication had hurt him and brought back painful memories, it pushed him to reconsider the path he was on. He had been starting to rely on alcohol as a sort of medication rather than a drink to be enjoyed in moderation. Gladio's abrasive approach had made him rethink it.

"Yeah, but I should never have compared you to her," Gladio said, 'it wasn't fair." Ignis didn't directly address the statement

"For all of her flaws, she was my mother. I've never stopped loving her," Ignis said calmly. Gladio didn't know what to say. He had his opinion about Ignis' mother, but there was no point in offering it in that moment. He just squeezed Ignis' shoulder firmly—a nonverbal sign of his friendship and support.

"Come on, it's almost time for dinner. The menu looks really weird tonight so you should like it." Gladio happily informed him. Ignis was suddenly very interested.

"What do you mean by 'weird'?"

"Triple truffle risotto _-_ whatever that is." Even though Gladio butchered the pronunciation, Ignis recognized the dish and was excited to try it. When Gladio, rather roughly, gripped his arm to guide him, Ignis fought the urge to brush him off. He was determined to heed King Regis' advice and accept help--at least some of the time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted Ignis to get the chance to meet someone from Niflheim on more friendly terms. When you play through Episode Prompto, you really learn that Gralea and the surrounding country was not doing well at all and very likely wanted their political leadership gone. The encyclopedia Cecily is reading from, you might have noticed, is the FF wiki! We will be moving on to Cartanica soon! Fun fact: the Titanic, Lusitania and other major early 20th-century ocean liners all had libraries (the Titanic had one for each class).


	21. Chapter 21

The  _Imperator_ reached Satherhaven, an imperial port town, around midafternoon. The sun was already quickly setting. Noctis and his Crownsguard followed the throng of passengers as they exited the ship and headed for the dock. Ignis felt a little overwhelmed by all the crowd noise-it made it more difficult to get a sense of his surroundings. He didn't resist Prompto's offer of help. Ignis had just gotten used to their quarters on the ship. Having to start over again was a little overwhelming.

Once they were on the dock, Ignis recommended that they retrieve the Regalia from the hold. He truly missed driving that car. Because of their travel situation, he hadn't thought about it much. Now that they'd actually be riding in the car, he felt surprisingly moved. He'd spent countless hours behind the wheel and now he'd likely never be able to drive again. He sighed in response to his thoughts, but didn't let his emotions get the better of him.

"Are you alright?" Prompto asked, noticing something was bothering him.

"I'm fine. I will be happy to have the Regalia back." After an unexpectedly long time, Noctis and Gladio were able to convince the cargo crew to bring the car out of storage.

"Who's going to drive?" Prompto asked innocently enough. Ignis hung his head a little-feeling more useless than he had for a few days. Noctis noticed and quickly stepped in.

"I'll do it-been awhile since I've been behind the wheel." In a matter of moments, they heard the distinctive hum of the Regalia's engine as it drove down the ramp onto the dock. A dodgy looking crew member stepped out of the driver's seat. He clearly wanted a tip. Gladio handed him a few gil with a snarl and accepted the keys back. He tossed them towards Noctis.

"Ready for more?" Noct said lightly. Prompto climbed into the passenger seat as he always did (his tendency to get carsick secured the spot for him long ago). Ignis waited for Gladio to open the doors before he attempted to take his seat. He cautiously touched the open door and was able to climb in. Gladio thought better of trying to help him-he knew that wouldn't be well received by his friend. Ignis settled the cane between his legs and held onto it with both hands. Gladio shut the door and took his spot.

"All set. What now?" Noctis asked.

"We need to find the main thoroughfare and review the maps. We should head to Cartanica first."

"Then Tenebrae." Noctis insisted. Gladio huffed.

"Gralea should be our top priority."

"Lunch should be our top priority," Prompto interjected, hoping to calm the mood. Gladio decided to cede the argument for now and leaned back in his seat. Noctis headed for the main street in Satherhaven feeling very unsure of this ability to drive them anywhere in Niflheim, let alone all the way to Gralea.

* * *

The Niflheim roads looked identical to the modern ones found in Lucis, but they were eerily empty. The surrounding environment was an arid, but beautiful desert filled with Acacia trees. Prompto took dozens of photos. Despite the beauty, it was an ominous place given its connection to the empire. Noctis found he didn't like driving there at all. He didn't see any of the familiar businesses that he knew in Lucis and didn't know if he could trust any of the locals. He stayed silent most of the drive, but Gladio was entertaining himself with brochures.

"Hey Iggy, you'll be glad to hear they have Ebony in Niflheim," Gladio said, reading from a restaurant guide he had taken from the port. It elicited no response from the man sitting next to him. Gladio looked up from the brochure and over at Ignis. He was leaning forward slightly; head bent a little downward.

"Are you asleep?" Gladio said, a little shocked. After a moment Ignis responded.

"No, I was just….meditating." Ignis found it very difficult to admit that even he could doze off.

"I've been reading you this brochure for the last 20 minutes," Gladio replied a little annoyed, "you really need some coffee."

"That would be splendid," he admitted.

"That last sign said there is a gas station up ahead, we should stop," Prompto chimed in. Noctis agreed and floored it to a small, family-run place. It looked a lot like the Coernix stations in Lucis, but it was more rundown, more abandoned. They piled out of the car and had a look around. The sun was fading fast despite the fact that it wasn't even 5 o'clock. The gas station looked even more dilapidated up close. The blacktop was fractured and a couple of pumps were out of order. There was even a stray dog eating out of a trash can near the shop entrance. Prompto, being such an animal lover, attempted to pet the dog, but it snarled and charged off with something it had found.

"Tough crowd," Gladio said, and pushed through the door. A tinny bell rung telling the shopkeepers that some customers had arrived. An older woman came to the counter. She was excited to have actual customers at first, but her expression became worried and suspicious once she got a look at them. The royal entourage didn't think of themselves as imposing, but Gladio in particular could be a bit frightening. Prompto started searching for snacks while Noctis absentmindedly walked down the hardware aisle. He instinctively searched for fishing equipment in such shops, but he had no desire to enjoy his hobby at the moment.

"You guys have any coffee?" Gladio asked. "My friend could really use some."

"Yes, we have own blend. I think you will like it." She responded with a little pride. Gladio ordered the largest size available. She nervously poured a steaming cup of coffee. Ignis' sense of smell had sharpened since his injury and he greatly anticipated tasting the aromatic drink. As she handed the cup to Gladio, the woman's husband came out of the office. He was in good shape for his age, not that he could pose a real threat to the four, battle hardened young men, but he had a menacing presence.

"What brings you boys out this way?" he asked. Prompto and Noctis both had a feeling there could be trouble so they moved back towards the counter.

"We are on our way to Gralea," Gladio said, "we have been away on business and really want to get back." It wasn't exactly a lie, but it wasn't exactly the truth. The old man didn't seem to be buying it. Prompto dropped his armful of snacks onto the counter and Mrs. Shopkeeper started to ring them up; her hands were shaking slightly.

"By road? You'd might as well walk," the old man said with a scoff.  _These boys are definitely not from around here_ , he thought. Ignis sensed his thoughts and decided to step in.

"We typically travel by train," he said, knowing his accent would match some of the northern regions in Niflheim fairly well, "but we thought it might be more scenic to travel by car."

"It'd be scenic alright-up until you get to the Ghorovas Rift and freeze your asses off," Mr. Shopkeeper replied.

"Indeed, but I must confess I am a bit curious to see the Glacian's frozen form." Ignis had read about the incident in history books in Insomnia. His 3 friends, were a little more perplexed. In M.E. 745, Shiva had awakened in the Ghorovas Rift. The imperial army attacked and after a sustained and bloody fight, she was defeated. Shiva's physical form was frozen in stone, and a devastating blizzard descended that transformed the desert like region surrounding Gralea into a tundra of ice. The blizzard had still not ceased. Cecily had told him about how much it had affected life in Gralea.

"Young men are so adventurous," Mrs. Shopkeeper said, seeming to warm up to them up a bit. Ignis inwardly breathed a sigh of relief.

"Yes, and stupid too, believe me I know," the older man said with a smile, "I recommend you go by train. You can look out the windows from a safe distance."

"Thanks for the tip," Gladio said as he picked up the bag of snacks and handed Ignis his coffee.

"Farewell," Ignis said in the general direction of the older couple.

"Stay safe out there," Mrs. Shopkeeper replied genuinely.

Once they were outside, they decided it was time to make tracks.

"People are real suspicious around here, aren't they?" Prompto observed.

"Indeed," Ignis said, "it seems our casual attire isn't enough to relax them."

"It's getting dark, we need to find a haven," Gladio observed.

"Are you sure that's a good idea? It might be a long walk before we find one," Prompto noted.

"Are you that much of a wimp? A little exercise would be good. We've been resting for weeks," Gladio responded, not catching Prompto's implication.

"He means Ignis can't handle it," Noctis said in a nearly monotone voice. That wounded Ignis and he didn't hide it as well as he'd hoped. Gladio got annoyed at himself for not realizing and at Noctis for being so blunt.

"Noct," Prompto said with a little reproach in his voice.

"You don't have to spare my feelings, Prompto. Perhaps we should return to Satherhaven for the night," Ignis said.

"Yeah," Gladio replied. "Besides, I think that old codger was right-we should travel by train."

"I agree, I don't want to 'freeze my ass off'," Prompto responded with conviction. Noct nodded, but kept watching Ignis' face. He knew he'd hurt him, but he couldn't bring himself to apologize. That would probably just wound his pride further. He offered an olive branch instead.

"Specs, what do you think we should do?" Noct finally asked.

"I think we ought to make train travel arrangements. The extra funds the First Secretary supplied should be enough to get us, and the Regalia, to Gralea-if we are cautious with our spending along the way."

"Sounds like a plan," Gladio said as he dropped the bag of snacks into the back seat. Ignis reluctantly accepted Prompto's help finding his seat and quietly sipped his coffee for most of the trip back.

* * *

Night had fallen by the time they arrived in Satherhaven. Gladio made arrangements for the train tickets while Prompto and Ignis secured hotel rooms for the night. Once they were settled in, Prompto ordered some room service for dinner.

"This is disgusting," Prompto announced after taking one bite of what was obviously some sort of microwaved pasta concoction. Gladio took a taste-determined to prove that Prompto was a whiner.

":OK, you're right this is awful. What in Eos is it?" Even though Ignis had very little appetite, he was now curious form a culinary perspective what had gone wrong with the dish. He asked to taste it.

"At one point in its life, this was a lasagna, most likely," Ignis said after taking a moderately sized forkful of it, "you have as good a chance of being poisoned by that as you do being nourished." The cuisine on the  _Imperator_ had softened the blow of losing Ignis' fresh cooked meals, but now it was painfully obvious that they'd suffer without the use of his culinary talents.

"Makes me appreciate your cooking more," Prompto said as he scraped the atrocity into the trash. Ignis didn't reply. He appreciated the compliment, but just thinking about the fact that he'd likely never be able to cook at the level he had again caused him too much personal anguish. It wasn't just a skill to him, it was his passion. One of his greatest joys was to see how much people enjoyed the food he prepared. He sat down in a wingback chair he'd nearly tripped over when they came in and leaned forward against his cane.

"OK, cup noodles it is." Gladio announced and set off to find a microwave. Prompto took a seat in the chair opposite Ignis.

"Hey, Iggy. I'd be happy to help you cook if you want. I'm not too good in the kitchen, but I'm not the worst," Prompto suggested. Ignis was surprised by the offer and by how raw his emotions still were.

"Thank you. Perhaps some time in the near future," Ignis responded. He didn't truly have confidence that he would ever be spending much time cooking again, but he was thankful for the glimmer of hope that Prompto's offer gave him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I invented the city of "Satherhaven" on the assumption that there had to be some port town for them to land in. The ocean around the Cartanica region is called the "Sathersea" so I based it on that. If you haven't watched some of the out-of-bounds-glitch videos of the Niflheim region I strongly recommend you do it! There is a lot out there that you never really get to see in game. I added this short road trip in part because there are roads all over Cartanica! Maybe we will one day get these areas in an update. On to the train! As always, thank you for reading and commenting. It is much appreciated.


	22. Chapter 22

"Are you doing alright, Iggy?" Prompto asked from his perch on the top bunk. Their "roomette" on the train was tiny, but the beds were comfortable enough.

"Yes," Ignis responded hazily, "it's only a headache." He was stretched out on the bunk below Prompto with his right arm draped over his eyes. It was strange enough for Ignis to be lying down at any time-let alone in mid-morning. It was an obvious sign that he was more uncomfortable than he let on. Noctis stared at him with some concern in his eyes, but he didn't say anything.

Ignis had a high pain tolerance, but even he found the facial nerve pain occasioned by his eye injury quite hard to endure sometimes. Attacks could happen without warning. It felt like his eye, jaw and sinuses were on fire. The pain would crescendo to a point where he felt like he could scream. He adjusted his position a little, but nothing seemed to make him more comfortable. The intensity of the pain was beginning to nauseate him. He sighed and rested his left hand on his stomach. He tried to focus on the persistent 'clickety-clack' of the train wheels and the whine of the metal track to take his mind off of it.

"I expect these two to be in bed at 11 am, but not you Ignis," Gladio said. It sounded flip, but Ignis knew it was Gladio's way of asking if he was alright. Ignis didn't get a chance to reply before Prompto hopped off the top bunk.

"Cut Iggy some slack, he's not feeling too good," Prompto replied on behalf of his friend.

"I'm fine," Ignis said as he sat up-that was a mistake. The sudden change in movement caused his pain to flare up; he instinctively held his head and leaned forward. He hadn't intended to make this much of a scene.

"That sure as hell doesn't look like fine," Gladio growled with concern.

"Just let him rest," Noctis said as he stood up from his bunk, "I'm going for a walk."

"Typical," Gladio replied. Noctis' temper flared at that, but he let it slide. He couldn't stand watching Ignis in that kind of pain. Prompto was experienced enough with carsickness to know what someone looks like right before they are about to get sick and Iggy had that look. He picked up a trash can and set it down in front of Ignis.

"Just in case you need it," Prompto explained. Ignis felt quite undignified at this point.

"Let's hope it won't be necessary," he replied. Prompto sat down beside him on the bunk.

"Prompto, keep an eye on Ignis. I'm going to find Prince Charmless." Gladio stomped out of the room. Ignis had to admit he was a little thankful to have the Noctis-Gladio cold war in a different part of the train for now.

"My track coach taught me a breathing technique for nausea. Inhale deeply through your nose, then exhale slowly through the mouth, and repeat a few times," Prompto explained. Ignis was very skeptical about this strategy, but he gave it a try. After a few minutes, he was surprised to find how much better he felt.

"Feeling better?" Prompto asked. Ignis nodded.

"Surprisingly, yes."

"What, you didn't trust me? I'm insulted," Prompto said lightly. He stood up and stretched his arms.

"Let's go find you a window seat. That always helps me," Prompto said not really thinking about the implications of his statement.

"I'm afraid that won't do much for me, but if you wish," Ignis replied and smoothed the sleeves of his casual shirt.

* * *

Gladio hovered around the back of the train car. Noctis was sitting by himself while Prompto and Ignis sat together in on a nearby bench. He planned to confront Noctis about his lack of leadership, but he had to find the right moment. It's not something he had any desire to do-he knew Noctis was sinking into depression-but he felt that someone had to do it. He paced while he listened in on the conversation between Prompto and Ignis and waited for his moment to strike.

"So, we're gonna roll through Tenebrae…" Prompto said, trying to break the unbearable silence. He was pretty shocked that Noctis hadn't said anything when the two of them entered the car.

"Not before visiting the royal tomb in Cartanica," Ignis replied softly. He sounded very tired.

"You're sure you're up to that?" Prompto responded carefully.

"The wounds have mended," he replied, hanging his head a little, "eyesight's a matter of time." He hadn't been able to bring himself to tell the others the truth. He knew it wasn't coming back. Loud footfalls on the metal floor told Ignis that Gladio was approaching.

"The hell is wrong with you?" he snarled at Noct. It was surprising for him to be so aggressive with his friend.

"What?" Noct said with surprise-and anger-in his voice.

"We're not stopping in Tenebrae," Gladio answered authoritatively. Noctis and Gladio had been arguing about this point for some time.

"You need to grow up and get over it." Gladio inwardly winced as he said it. He knew Noctis was hurting, but he felt the only way to get him to take on a role of leadership was to push and push him hard. Noct jumped out of his seat and squared up in front of Gladio.

"I am over it. I'm here aren't I?!" Prompto could see other passengers getting uncomfortable. They were definitely making a scene. Gladio grasped Noctis by the shirt. He needed to make this convincing. Prompto was at the edge of his seat now, worried at what they might do to each other.

"Maybe when you're not too busy moping, you can look around and give a shit about someone worse off than you." That seemed to have an effect.

"Let go of me," Noctis said, relatively calmly, but Gladio didn't.

"How's that ring fit ya? You'd rather carry it around than wear it?" Gladio could see Noctis was at his breaking point. He was trying to rile him and it was working.

"She gave her life so you could do your duty, not so you could sit around feeling sorry for yourself," he said gruffly and gave Noctis a bit of shake for good measure.

"You don't think I know that!" Noctis snarled in response.

""You don't! Ignis took one for you too, and for what?" Ignis had allowed it to go on, but now that Gladio intended to use him as a way to push Noctis, he decided to step in.

"Enough, Gladio!" Ignis shouted. The sound of his voice stopped them all in their tracks. He wasn't one to raise his voice or command silence. It's not something Ignis wanted to do, but he wouldn't allow Gladio to make Noctis feel responsible for what had happened and he didn't want to be characterized as a helpless like a victim.

"You think you're a king," Gladio continued, "but you're a coward." That was too much. Noctis lunged forward, grabbing Gladio by his shirt. Prompto jumped up, not willing to watch them actually hurt one another.

"Don't do this!" he shouted. Gladio pushed him away roughly.

"I get it alright! I get it!" Noctis screamed his voice breaking a little.

"Then get a grip," Gladio replied, finally deciding to back down, "pull your head outta your ass already!" His job was done, he hoped. Noct abruptly turned around and walked off.

"Noct!" Prompto called after him, ready to follow.

"Leave him." Gladio said. Prompto stopped in his tracks and let Noctis walk off. He sank back down into the seat across from Ignis.

"Give him time," Ignis said and leaned his aching head back against the seat. The tension in the group was becoming too much for him to tolerate. He turned his head toward the window and imagined what the scenery might be like.

* * *

It wasn't long before the train screeched to a halt in Cartanica. Prompto sincerely hoped that this royal tomb would actually be in a safe place. The train station was a high platform overlooking a barren landscape. There were some buildings scattered around down below-most looked like abandoned factories and warehouses. In the distance, you could see the dark blue water of the Sathersea.

The royal tomb was allegedly located deep in the Fodina Caestino mine. There was an elevator access point not far from the train platform. The government had banned ordinary hikers and spelunkers from entering the mine after reports of some animal attacks and the sudden, rapid growth of a tree inside the mine alarmed experts. Some even suggested it might be a sign of the impending 'wrath of the gods'. Prompto leaned over a railing looking out at the expense-worrying about all of these things and hoping Ignis was going to be able to survive it all.

Gladio was just as concerned and decided to make one last attempt to talk sense into Ignis. Once they stepped off the train, he gripped Ignis' right arm.

"Hey, Iggy. Let's get something to eat," he suggested, "there's a restaurant over there."

"You go on ahead, I am not particularly hungry," Ignis replied politely. He was still feeling a little unwell after the headache he'd just endure. Gladio started to guide him along-rather brusquely, Ignis thought/

"You are losing too much weight. Time to eat," Gladio replied. It did sound a bit like something he would say to Noctis. Ignis decided not to protest. He had to admit a little food would do him some good.

The restaurant itself was just a glorified dining car which still had a charm, Gladio thought. The food options were terrible, though. They only had set menu options like they did on the train itself. The lunch option was some sort of TV dinner like creation. Gladio just wanted calories so he didn't really care what it tasted like. But he was able to convince the "chef" to make Ignis a bowl of tomato soup instead.

The two slid into opposite sides of a booth. Gladio absentmindedly looked over the dessert menu (he wasn't really interested in frozen apple pie). Ignis sat quietly in his seat, feeling a little exposed. He knew people walking by were staring at him-he even heard a little kid whisper about how scary those "men in black" were.

Once the food arrived, Gladio regretted going with the main course. His plate was covered in unidentifiable things, and the ones that were identifiable were not appetizing. He shoveled in a few bites of cottage cheese that had definitely not been stored at the right temperature. Ignis could tell his soup was straight from a can, but it didn't taste so bad.

"How's the soup?" Gladio asked, breaking the ice.

"Tolerable, not something I'd strongly recommend, though," Ignis replied. Despite the faint praise, he kept eating. He found he was hungrier than he expected to be and was happy about that. Gladio finished the rest of his plate, not looking forward to the next part of their conversation. He shoved in the pallid chocolate chip cookie (easily the best part of the meal) and decided to get on with it.

"Iggy, you should stay up here. Just chill out for a while. Prompto, Noct and I can handle this." Ignis wasn't surprised that Gladio was saying this, but he was still hurt. Nevertheless, he did a better job of hiding that than he had back in Altissia.

"I understand your concern," he said diplomatically, "but my place is beside Noctis."

"Look, you've really got balls, wanting to go down there despite everything, but this isn't about proving how tough you are. It's about life and death." Gladio said conclusively, but not in a hostile way. Ignis bristled at the suggestion he would ever risk their lives.

"I would never put your lives in danger, least of all Noctis." Ignis said firmly.

"Not intentionally," Gladio shot back.

"Not ever." Ignis said with some finality. Gladio sighed heavily and wiped his hands off with a napkin. He crumpled it and tossed it onto his tray.

"Nothing I say is gonna convince you to stay, is it?" Ignis didn't reply at first, but a smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth.

"My expertise will still be of great value-even if my combat skills will not," it was a major ego hit for him to say something like that, but he had to be honest. He knew he his courage was not wanting, but it would be difficult for him to have a real impact on the battlefield in his current condition. He was thankful he had studied up on Cartanica when he had the chance.

A waitress cleared their plates and the two fell silent. Gladio leaned forward on the table, hoping he'd think of something to keep Ignis safe in the mine. Ignis stayed silent and listened to ambient conversations. He noticed that his hearing had become much more acute over the last month. Familiar sounding footsteps drew his attention.

"Guys, I think you'd biter finish up here. Noct is already at the elevator," Prompto informed them. Gladio cursed under his breath and threw a few gil on the table. Ignis slid out of the booth. He was determined to follow them, but even he had to admit the prospect of fighting dangerous beasts and wandering around a mine without his sight was a bit terrifying….

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are nearing the end I'm sad to say! There should be a couple of more chapters. A little background-in chapter 10, if you wander around Cartanica long enough, you can find Gladio and Ignis in a diner (Prompto actually tells you where to find them). Sadly, they don't say anything, so I decided to show what was happening there. As always, thanks for reading and commenting!


	23. Chapter 23

Noctis stared at the elevator which led down to the entrance of the Fodina Caestino mine. He wasn't feeling particularly motivated to take the journey down into the mine; he was having trouble seeing the point in continuing the fight. Before Noct could actually activate the elevator, Gladio gently gripped his shoulder and pulled him aside.

"You need to tell Ignis to stay behind," he said in a harsh whisper.

"I'm not leaving him behind," Noctis replied coldly-the tone of voice confirming that the king and his shield were not yet reconciled.

"He can't handle combat. Believe me, I know." Gladio insisted. He thought back to their sparring session a few weeks before. Ignis had barely been able to hold a parry. Noct looked back at his advisor. He was slowly approaching, using his cane to guide the way while Prompto stayed close to his side, ready to help him if need be. It would be impossible to fight effectively with two party members tied up like that.

"The only thing that could keep him from coming with us is if you command him to stay," Gladio said. Noctis knew it was true and he was struggling with the decision. He didn't hear Ignis approach.

"Ready to set out?" Ignis asked as the party approached the decrepit looking freight elevator at the edge of the platform.

"Yeah, I guess so," he paused for a moment, and genuinely considered his options. He knew leaving Ignis behind would probably speed up the mission and possibly keep his friend safe, but he couldn't imagine continuing on with Ignis. He made his choice.

"You're going aren't you?" Noctis said and activated the elevator. Gladio shook his head, disappointed in Noct's choice. He saw it as poor leadership.

"I'll manage somehow," Ignis replied and followed Noctis into the elevator.

* * *

The entrance to the mine did not fill them with confidence. It was a gravelly, slick path with a broken guardrail.

"Footing's bad. Watch your step," Gladio announced for Ignis' sake.

"As best I can," Ignis replied as he carefully navigated around a rusted, abandoned bulldozer.

"Go at your own pace," Prompto said kindly, "we'll wait."

The situation was dragging Noctis deeper and deeper into depression. It was the first time they'd worked together as a group since Altissia. The idea of searching a royal tomb and a large dangerous mine without Ignis at 100% was a bit frightening. A light drizzle started-making the uneven ground more treacherous. Prompto fell into stride beside Ignis. Noctis went on ahead slowly to scout the terrain.

They came to a fork in the road. Noctis swung right and moved a little more quickly than he'd meant towards a small puddle. Ignis followed the sounds of his footsteps, but didn't realize how deep the lip of the puddle was and slipped in. He fell to his knees, splashing the filthy water all over him. Prompto quickly sprang into action and helped him up. Ignis held up his hand in a gesture of thanks. Noctis felt terrible, but his guilt changed into anger when Gladio spoke.

"Is it too much to ask the royal procession sticks together?"

"Is it too much to ask you to shut it?" Noctis snapped back. Despite the commentary, Noctis did continue on more slowly until they arrived at a large, shallow pool filled with Gurangatch. There was no way forward without passing through the pool, so he trudged in slowly. That instantly attracted the attention of the giant beats.

"Watch out," Gladio said, "they're right on top of us."

"Thank you," Ignis replied and summoned a dagger into his right hand-leaving his left hand free to hold his cane. Noctis warped in, delivering a punishing blow to one of the largest beasts. He was clearly planned to make this a solo effort. Prompto and Gladio rushed to catch up with Ignis lagging behind, trying to navigate by sound.

A loud shot rang out and one of the Gurangatch screeched in pain-Prompto's shot had knocked one of them flat. Ignis knew the animal would be vulnerable so he headed towards the sound of the whimpering, but the knee deep water caused him to stumble and nearly fall on his face. He quickly scrambled to get up and smashed his fist in anger against the surface of the water. A strong grip hauled him back to his feet.

"Careful, Ignis," Prompto said as he lined up another shot.

"That was quite careless of me," Ignis responded apologetically.

"Look out!" Gladio rushed towards Ignis and Prompto, just managing to summon his shield in time to block an attack from one of the largest Gurangatch. He was able to repel the animal, but they were flanked by two smaller ones. Ignis held his dagger and cane in front of him, blocking an attack just in time. The Gurangatch was vicious, though and relentlessly snapped at the quickly weakening Ignis. Gladio and Prompto were occupied with two different enemies and couldn't help. One last swipe of claw was too much for Ignis-his dagger disappeared in a flurry of blue light and he went flying to the ground as the claw connected with his flesh.

"Ignis!" Noct shouted from the other side of the pool. He switched to a great-sword and warped directly into the beast's back-felling it in one hit. Prompto and Gladio finished off their assailants and rushed over to Noctis and Ignis.

Noctis knelt down by Ignis' side. He had an ugly wound, but there was still enough time to use an elixir. He cracked open a vial letting the magic-infused substance heal the wound. Ignis was still in a haze as he got back to his feet and brushed himself off.

"I'm in your debt," Ignis said.

"I probably owe you more than one," Noctis replied, "but maybe you should hang back." Noctis sounded concerned, but also a little annoyed.

"Was I in the way?" Ignis asked, sounding genuinely surprised. He had nearly been knocked unconscious by the beast but rescuing each other in battle was something they did instinctively.

"No, you weren't. It's just…" Noctis couldn't bring himself to finish his thought. In all of his years serving Noctis and dealing with his petulant behavior, Ignis couldn't recall ever feeling so hurt by something the prince had said.

* * *

They mercifully reached a haven after a half day of trudging through the murky pools. Ignis was very tired after the ordeal with the Gurangatch and the steep hill they had to climb wasn't helping matters. Prompto and Noctis went ahead to start a fire and set up camp. Gladio walked alongside Ignis, making sure his friend could handle the hike up the hill. He'd taken quite a few hits during the battle.

"Doing alright?" Gladio asked as he splashed through yet another muddy puddle.

"I'm fine. Don't mind me," was the terse reply. Ignis wasn't proud of his performance on the battlefield. He was never the weakest link, but now he felt like a liability. He was determined to change that. He started walking more quickly, perhaps in response to his thoughts, and stumbled forward. Gladio caught Iggy's forearm before he hit the ground. He pulled him back to his feet. Ignis could tell his chronic shoulder pain was going to be acting up tonight.

"Don't push yourself, Ignis," Gladio replied and resumed the trek up the hill. A light drizzle started adding insult to injury. Ignis was starting to feel chilly, and pulled his coat more tightly around his chest. Gladio was focused on the sunset-it was far too early for it to be getting dark.  _A sign of the end times?_

When Gladio and Ignis approached campsite, Prompto hopped up to help Ignis find his seat. Ignis felt embarrassed by the need for help but he made an effort to swallow his pride. That was proving to be one of the most difficult things about the recovery process. Once he was comfortably in his seat, he thanked his friends and leaned forward-trying to let the sting of embarrassment roll off his back. Gladio sat down in the neighboring seat and stared daggers at Noctis, who was just silently watching the fire.

"So, what's for dinner?" Prompto asked, innocently enough. It cut Ignis to the quick. He focused on the feeling of heat from the fire and the fraction of light that he could sense from it. He had mastered his emotions through years of mental and physical training, but even so, the thought that he would never be able to cook again broke his heart.

Gladio shook his head and angrily walked over to the stove. He prepared cup noodles-slightly better than the tin can of mystery meat that Prompto had found-and served everyone their portion. He refused to sit in his usual chair, though, and opted to face away from the group and sit on the cooler near the stove. He couldn't stand to look at Noctis and Noctis couldn't stand to look at him.

Ignis was thankful when Prompto took the seat beside him and started a conversation. The last month or so had really changed Ignis' view of the young man. He always liked Prompto, but he always thought of him as a class clown-good for comic relief. He'd learned now, though, that Prompto had a kind and giving heart. He'd grown to rely on his help and support. Halfway through the conversation, Gladio trudged over to the tent without even bidding them goodnight. Prompto struck up the conversation again after watching his exit.

"So why did the Nifs ban people from coming down here?" Prompto asked in between mouthfuls of Cup Noodles.

"Well, the giant beasts for one," Ignis replied. Prompto shrugged his shoulders. They'd been plenty of places with giant beasts.

"No worse than back in Lucis," Prompto countered.

"I think the tree is their real concern," Ignis said ominously.

"What about it?"

"It's grown enormous recently, blocking access to most of the resources down here, apparently."

"It's just a tree, right?"

"Perhaps, but some scientists have suggested that it might be 'a paranormal prelude to the awakening and annihilation of the gods'". Ignis had overheard a couple of men discussing a newspaper article on the subject back at the train platform. He found that line particularly striking. Prompto was suddenly a little anxious and decided he wanted to be safe inside the tent.

"That's enough ghost stories for me, Iggy. I'm heading to sleep," Prompto said as he stood and stretched. Ignis half smiled. He did enjoy scaring Prompto and Noctis from time to time.

"Have a good night."

Ignis knew Noctis was still sitting nearby-even though he wouldn't speak.

"Noct?" he called, unsure if he would get a response.

"Yeah?" he didn't sound sullen, he just sounded numb.

"Would you mind preparing a few elemancy flasks for me?" Ignis recalled the bestiary Cecily had read to him on the _Imperator_ and knew elemancy might be crucial to their survival deeper in the mine.

"Sure….but should you really be messing with that right now?" Ignis bristled a bit at the suggestion that he would do anything unsafe on the battlefield, but he didn't let his temper affect his voice.

"I seem to recall being set on fire more than once on this journey," Ignis replied, snarkily referring to one of the many instances of friendly fire Noctis had inadvertently visited upon his friends.

"Alright, Specs. I get it." Noctis did have to smirk at the memory of Ignis' hair standing on end after some stray lighting came his way. He affectionately patted Ignis' shoulder as he walked to the elemancy deposits nearby.

Ignis smiled and felt for a moment like things could return to normal-they all just needed time to heal.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the delay—I’ve been really swamped with work lately. One more chapter to go! A lot of those incidental lines are taken from chapter 10. Honestly, it was difficult to revisit that camp scene. It really gut punched me the first time I watched it. As always, thanks for reading and commenting!


	24. Chapter 24

" _...a king pushes onward, always, accepting the consequences and never looking back…"_

The sound of Regis' voice stirred Ignis from a deep, but not peaceful sleep. He half expected to see when he woke, but he clearly wasn't in the realm of his dreams this time-he was in the dark. He slowly sat up and put on his glasses—as was his habit. He stretched his arms and felt a sharp twinge in his left shoulder. He tried to massage the knot out to no avail-it was going to be one of those days. Coffee was a necessity. He would have been making breakfast by now, but that wasn't an option for him. Not yet anyway.

He crawled over to the small bag of supplies they always kept near the entrance and tried to feel for a can of Ebony. The rustling must have woken Prompto.

"I hope you found something edible in there because I'm starving," Prompto said as he pulled himself into a sitting position.

"I just want some coffee," Ignis said as he fortuitously chanced upon a can of Ebony. He opened it and took a healthy sip. He could already feel the caffeine jolting his brain awake.

Prompto started to fish in the bag himself. He was disappointed to find a limited range of breakfast options. He finally produced a loaf of bread—almost stale—from the bag. He stared at it hopelessly.

"Stale bread. Mmm, Can't wait."

"If you stir the fire a little, you could toast that bread," Ignis noted.

"Good idea, why didn't I think of that?" Prompto said and walked out of the tent. Ignis decided not to answer that question and followed his friend outside.

Ignis briefly explained how to place a grate over the fire and cook the toast. Prompto followed the instructions and, in short order, they had some flame-roasted toast. A little fresh butter or preserves would have made it much better, but it was nice to have some warm food. Prompto ate two pieces by the time Ignis had got halfway through his first.

The smell of food roused Gladio—and even Noctis.

"Toast, Ignis? Not your finest work," Noctis joked. He was genuinely happy to see Ignis cooking anything—even that.

"I'm just the sous chef today," Ignis answered. None of them knew what that was, but they were all glad to be having a simple meal together. Once the toast feast was complete, they packed up and started to leave the haven.

"Hey Ignis," Noctis said just before his adviser started down the path, "you should put on your jacket."

"It's a little warm this morning," Ignis answered.

"Yeah, but it looks like it's going to rain," Noctis replied, but he was really considering how it might give Ignis a little more protection in combat. Ignis was touched by the consideration. It was the sort of thing he'd usually do for Noctis.

"If you insist," Ignis said as he untied his jacket from his waist.

"I insist," Noctis said with mock gravitas and fell into stride next to his friend.

* * *

" _Maybe you should hang back."_ Noctis' words ricocheted in Igns' head as the party trudged through the maze-like mine. He was the dependable and capable one-he never needed help. Ignis had been Noctis' adviser and confidante since he was 6 years old. Not once in the 16 years since, had Noctis ever doubted Ignis' competence. For Noctis to now see him as a liability was an indescribable feeling. He was both angry and crushed, but he had no time to indulge those feelings.

" _Don't let it get to you,"_ he repeated silently to himself as he often did in such difficult situations. His internal monologue had distracted him enough to make him forget his surroundings briefly. He was startled when Gladio gripped his shoulder firmly and pulled him back a few steps.

"One more step and you'd be taking the fast way down that ladder," Gladio said. Ignis reached forward with his cane and could clearly feel that there was a large drop off. He felt a little embarrassed.

"This is proving to be a challenge," he admitted a little somberly.

"What'd you expect?" Gladio shot back-not angrily, but Ignis could detect annoyance and frustration in his voice. He decided not to respond.

"Noct-slow down," Gladio said testily, "Ignis can't keep up." Ignis was beginning to discover that one of his biggest challenges would be enduring humiliation. He didn't think of himself as a proud person before his injury, but now he felt each slight keenly.

Eventually, they found the lowest chamber of the mine, but the entrance was blocked by a giant piece of drilling equipment. They quickly discovered they needed to turn on a power generator in order to move the machine. That meant another long and treacherous trip through the labyrinth of the mine. Ignis dreaded every second; he had to be at peak concentration not to get tripped up. The persistent drizzling amplified his despondent mood.

* * *

"Did you hear that?" Noctis said as the giant drill sprang to life.

"Sounds like we're clear!" Prompto said excitedly.

"Grand," Ignis added.

"Then let's move," Gladio grunted. Noctis sprinted down the stairs from the generator and headed for the blocked path. Gladio growled his disapproval and Ignis followed along behind-feeling like he was slowing the party down.

It wasn't long before they re-discovered the entrance to the lowest chamber. The path down was slippery and steep. Despite his best efforts, Ignis stumbled and fell. The foul smell of the water that splashed in his face nearly caused him to be sick. Prompto reached down to help him, but Ignis waved his friend off. He wanted to take care of himself. Prompto took a couple of steps back and walked into the cavern.

"This cave is huge!" Prompto exclaimed.

"The tomb's further in?" Ignis asked as he tried to follow the sound of their footsteps. His voice sounded a little hesitant.

"You wanna wait here?" Noctis asked-misinterpreting the trepidation in Ignis' voice.

"Alone? Here?" Gladio asked incredulously.

"Not what I said," Noctis replied curtly.

The party continued on, with Ignis trailing a little ways behind. He was carefully trying to avoid falling into the fetid water-as Prompto had wisely advised him to avoid. Once they were near the center of the cavern, Noctis could see something that looked like the entrance to a royal tomb nestled in the trunk of the large tree, but he stopped in his tracks when a giant, angry Malboro sprang from the depth of the swamp.

"That looks like a mouth. Is that its face!?" Prompto screeched in terror as he whipped out his pistol.

"What? What is it?" Ignis asked, the anxiety obvious in his voice. The giant Malboro attacked too quickly for anyone to respond. Gladio took two giant swings at its long, vine-like arms but nothing happened. Noctis went for a warp strike and was immediately swatted away like a gnat. Prompto fired round after round but it didn't even seem to annoy the monster. Ignis kept his distance at first, concerned that he might actually impede their progress against the enemy.

"It's useless!" Gladio shouted as he retreated slightly.

"This might be a good time to panic," Noctis replied only half-jokingly. Ignis' heart rate was increasing. It was his duty to protect Noctis and he was just a spectator. He had to do something.

"No! There must be a way," Ignis replied, partly to himself.  _Think, Ignis, Think_. He thought back to the ship and the book Cecily had read to him.  _Malboro._ He remembered hearing her words describing the foul creature...but what was its weakness? He focused, his pounding heart made it difficult to recapture the memory.  _Fire. That's it!_

"Noct, I have an idea. If I may…" Ignis took the flask of fire that Noctis had prepared the night before into his left hand. He listened as intently as he could to monster's hideous grunts and threw the flask with as much force as he could muster towards the creature's mouth. In moments, the monster ignited and screeched in pain as it perished.

"Ah, as I suspected." Ignis said, very pleased with the result.

"It really worked!" Prompto shouted.

"Iggy, you saved us." Gladio said with real gratitude and a touch of guilt. He had been adamant that Ignis stay behind ever since he'd been injured. Noctis didn't say anything-which annoyed Gladio-and headed for the tomb's entrance. Ignis, Prompto and Gladio followed him in and remained at a distance as Noctis collected the Katana of the Warrior.

"Now let's haul ass," Gladio said abruptly and turned to leave. Ignis was finally fed up. They weren't working as a team and he could no longer stand the open hostility between Noctis and Gladio.

"A moment?" Ignis signaled that he wanted to talk.

"Is everything OK?" Gladio asked, suspecting that their wounded friend needed to rest.

"It bloody well isn't. And I won't suffer this pointless bickering any longer," Ignis said with conviction in his voice. It surprised Noctis and Prompto to hear him curse like that.

"Let's be frank. My vision hasn't improved and probably won't." His voice was steady but he felt a lump form in his throat-it was the first time he had said that out loud to them. Noctis turned to look at him. He'd been telling himself that one day Ignis would wake up with his vision healed. That hope was taken away all at once.

"...yet in spite of this I would remain with you all-" he paused to steady his voice, tears were genuinely threatening now, "-till the very end."

"Sorry. But I object-war is a matter of life and death," Glaido interjected brusquely.

"But we'll be there!" Prompto shot back, a little heatedly. He very rarely stood up to Gladio.

"It's not about us looking out for him!" Gladio returned.

"Well, then he should be free to choose," Prompto insisted-refusing to give ground.

"There's more to it than just what he wants!" Gladio was losing his temper. All the emotion that had built up since Altissia was boiling over.

"I know full well!" Ignis shouted. That silenced them all-he never raised his voice. "I won't ask you to slow down," he continued, " If I can't keep up, I will bow out." It was humbling for him to say it, but liberating at the same time.

"What says 'his majesty'?" Gladio said with mock deference. Noctis couldn't respond, it was all too much to bear.

"Noct, you are king," Ignis said in a soothing voice. In that moment, Ignis vividly recalled, King Regis' words. "One cannot lead by standing still. A king pushes onward always, accepting the consequences and never looking back." Ignis could see Regis perfectly in his mind's eye as he said it-and so could Noctis. Ignis paused and walked closer to Gladio. It startled Gladio a little-Ignis was already adjusting to his lack of vision.

"Gladio, Noct will take his rightful place, but only once he's ready," Ignis said with gentleness and authority. It was the kind of leadership they had been desperately lacking ever since Ignis had been injured. Gladio knew he'd been defeated.

"Have it your way," Gladio said as he turned to leave. "We're still taking a big risk. We better  _all_ be ready."

Prompto took off after Gladio, hoping he might be able to smooth things over with the angry giant. Noctis couldn't really move. He was still reeling from the news that Ignis might be permanently blind. After a few moments of silence, Ignis began to walk slowly towards the sound of Prompto's quickly vanishing footsteps.

"Specs, wait." Noctis said. Ignis stopped in his tracks. "What happened….what happened in Altissia?" Ignis didn't turn to face Noctis. He felt a surprising amount of anxiety at the question. His throat went dry and his heart started beating fast enough for him to feel it against his chest. The drizzle of the rain took him back to that moment on the altar, lying flat on the ground. Rain pouring. Ardyn's malicious smile. For a moment, Ignis couldn't catch his breath.

"Nevermind," Noctis said with disappointment, but not anger. He understood Ignis may not want to talk about it. When he started to walk away, Ignis spoke.

"I recall," he began shakily, "when the Hydraean raged-in the midst of the empire's retreat-one conspicuous craft remained behind, the chancellor's." He paused for a few moments to collect his thoughts. The soft rain filled the silence. "The last thing I remember seeing was his ship heading for the altar….I fell unconscious and was powerless to stop him." It was part apology, part confession. Noctis walked in front of Ignis and gently squeezed his shoulder.

"I'm just glad you're alive," Noctis said-intentionally stopping Ignis from saying more. He wanted to make it clear he didn't blame his oldest friend for anything that happened that day. Ignis nodded, but clearly was still shaken.

"Because I can't do this without you," Noctis said. It wasn't his habit to give hugs-in fact he almost never did-but he decided to make an exception. He put his right arm around Ignis' shoulders and pulled him close for a brief hug. He couldn't stop the tears from welling in his eyes and neither could Ignis. After a few moments, Noctis stepped back and started to walk slowly towards the entrance of the cavern. His usual swagger and light demeanor had returned.

"Got my back?" Noctis asked over his shoulder.

"Always," Ignis replied and started to follow his king. He smiled genuinely for the first time in a long time. The road ahead would not be an easy one, but he knew now for certain that nothing could shatter the bond he shared with the king and the Crownsguard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: A number of the lines in this do appear in game, but I rewrote the setting of the last scene. In the game, Ignis says his brief comment about Altissia at the start of ch. 11. I felt it made more sense for them to have a heart to heart right after that speech. I can't wait for Episode Ignis so we can find out more. This has been so much fun to write! Thank you for all of your lovely comments and support. There is a lot more I want to write about Ignis, but I plan to set that in the WoR (with Comrades launching today/tomorrow I hope to get lots of new background info). I hope you enjoyed!


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